


Got It Backwards

by kikikryslee



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Sex, Banter, Blow Jobs, Bottom Louis, Emotions, Established Relationship, Face-Sitting, First Dates, First Kiss, First Time, Flashbacks, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Light Angst, Literary References & Allusions, M/M, Mpreg, Mpreg Louis, Multiple Orgasms, Power Bottom Louis, Rich Harry, Riding, Rimming, Smut, Tears, Teasing, Top Harry, Tutor Harry, so many tears and emotions in this fic omg, these tags are so out of order haha, they'll make sense when you read the fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-13
Updated: 2017-09-13
Packaged: 2018-12-23 14:00:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 45,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11991282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kikikryslee/pseuds/kikikryslee
Summary: Harry said the baby's name again. “It’s perfect.”“Just like its daddy,” Louis told him. He placed a hand on top of his stomach and rubbed small circles into it.“Just like its papa,” Harry replied.“There you go again, being all cheesy.”“You started it.”“Yeah, I guess I did this time.”Harry leaned in to kiss Louis softly on the lips. As Louis kissed him back, all he could think about was how lucky he was. He had a loving boyfriend, a baby on the way and a house that he could have only ever dreamed about.At this point in his life, just a year and a half ago, everything he had was all just that – a dream.---Or, the one where Louis and Harry are having a baby and Louis is afraid that he isn’t ready, until he remembers how he and Harry first fell in love.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [denisemuriel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/denisemuriel/gifts).



> This work was a pinch hit, and definitely a true labor of love, so I really hope you enjoy it. I knew going in that this fic would be long, but I didn't realize how long until I actually started writing. Everyone in my gc's and my betas will tell you the same. But I finished! 
> 
> Thank you's especially go out to my betas, who started working on this fic when it was just a little 15K story, and kept going all the way through the 45K mark. [K](http://harrystinyshorts.tumblr.com/), [S](https://sweariwouldnt.tumblr.com/) and [G](http://tomlinshires.tumblr.com/) this fic would not be complete without all of your hard work! 
> 
> Follow the dates in each of the chapters. Half of this story is told through flashbacks, which I'm a huge fan of. But I know not everyone is, so if you'd like to read this story chronologically, you'll go Ch. 2, 4, 1, 3, 5. 
> 
> The fic was written for this prompt: Louis moves to a new city where he starts to study english literature or something. He struggles a little bit and his profs suggests that Harry tutors him. Harry and Louis don't really interact much before that, but when Louis sees Harry on campus or something he always smiles at him. Harry is from a rich background and everyone wants to be his friend because of that. Louis doesn't know he's rich and Harry is so happy that he gets treated like a normal person by Louis. They hook up, fall in love and Louis gets pregnant.
> 
> **DO NOT post this story or any of my other stories on any other websites. I'm not comfortable with that, and I hope that you can please respect that. If you see any of my stories on another website, please let me know. I am also NOT currently authorizing translations of any of my stories at this time. I hope you can respect that, as well. Thank you!**
> 
> I think that's about it. Enjoy!

**May 2017**

 

“OK, that’s perfect. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

Harry hung up the phone and placed it on the coffee table in front of him. The sound barely registered to Louis.

Louis had had some trouble really focusing on anything in the last hour or so, and was fortunate that Harry had the sense to take the phone from him after the doctor told him what he already knew in his heart.

“We can go to the doctor tomorrow at ten,” Harry said happily.

Louis nodded. “It’s a good thing we’re done finals, then, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, something tells me I wouldn't be very focused on them even if I did have them.”

Louis took a deep breath, but otherwise sat silently, still processing his thoughts.

“Are you OK?” Harry asked.

Louis stared down at his lap, still not knowing how to react to the news that he’d just received.

Of course, Louis had noticed that he’d been having more mood swings, throwing up more and not eating as much, but he’d thought it was stress, which made sense because he and Harry were graduating from college in three days. Just three days away from their adult lives.

Turns out, it was the early signs of pregnancy, which Louis hadn’t been expecting, pun not intended. This didn’t fit into his plan at all.

He and Harry were supposed to be on the job search for something that would make use of their education degrees. They were supposed to finally move in together and spend time decorating Harry’s house in a way that they both loved, even though Louis spent most of his time there anyway, and had already done some remodeling of his own. They were supposed to talk about getting engaged and when they would get married. Probably sometime in the next year or two, as they’d been dating for just over one year already. Then they were supposed to plan a wedding and maybe buy a bigger house, because then, and only then, would they talk about when to have their first baby.

But right now, it looked like everything would have to be a little backwards, because an at-home pregnancy test could give a false positive, but not the blood test from the doctor’s that he had taken two days ago.

They had a baby on the way.

A huge part of him was terrified - scared that he wasn’t ready and scared that he didn’t have what it took to be a father at all.

Part of him - a smaller part, admittedly - was nervous that Harry would think that Louis had gotten pregnant on purpose, wanting to trap him. But he knew Harry would never think that. Even though they only got together last year, Louis knew that he and Harry were in this relationship for the long run, forever. From their first date to the first time they had sex to the first time they met each other’s parents, the two of them had been very serious about each other. They never had time for any games and, for the most part, had always been very open and honest with each other. There was no doubt in his mind that he loved Harry and wanted to be with him, just like he had no doubts that Harry felt the same about him.

But then there was the big part of him that outweighed all of the anxious parts of him - the part that always wanted to be a father. He was no stranger to children, having six younger siblings and a mom who always welcomed help in taking care of them, and had been thinking about what his own children would be like since he was a teenager. Now that it was a reality, it was exciting. He would actually have a child soon that he could spoil and love and care for, and that child would love him back from the bottom of its heart.

And an even better thing to think about was that the child would share Harry’s DNA - sweet, frustrating, charming, goofy, stubborn, patient, loving Harry, the absolute love of Louis’ life.

And, well, what could be better than that?

Harry knelt down by Louis. He took both of Louis’ hands in his and looked Louis in the eye. “What are you thinking right now?” he asked gently.

Louis hesitated. That was a loaded question, seeing as, at that moment, his mind was racing in every single direction imaginable.

So he answered in the best way that he could. “We’re having a baby,” he whispered.

Harry nodded. “We are. Are you OK with that?”

“I don’t know.”

\---

That night, Louis lay in Harry’s bed - even though, despite Louis’ protests, Harry called it  _their_ bed since Louis slept over nearly every night - and stared at the ceiling. He hadn’t been acting like his normal self over the last few hours. Dinner that evening had been really awkward, with both him and Harry eating in almost complete silence.

Harry had tried to get Louis to talk to him after hanging up with the doctor, but only got one- or two-word responses from Louis, whose mind was still racing with thoughts about the future.

Of course money wasn’t an issue. It wasn’t like Harry didn’t have enough money from his trust fund and inheritance to support both them and the baby. But what about work? Would Louis really try to find a job now that he had a baby on the way? He could only work for a few months before having to take his parental leave. Would it even be worth it to do anything right now?

And they were young – so young. Both of them were only 22, and could only just technically be considered adults. How were they supposed to be responsible for a little baby?

The door to the connecting bathroom opened and Harry walked out. He slid under the covers, leaving a few inches of space between him and Louis. He stared straight ahead of him and risked a glance over at Louis.

“Lou?” he asked quietly.

Louis hummed in acknowledgement, but didn’t say anything.

“Are you OK? I know this was a huge surprise, but… I’m excited.”

Louis turned to look at Harry, shock clearly written across his face. “You are?”

“Yeah. Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?”

Louis scoffed and sat up. “I don’t know. Maybe because we’re not ready? We’re just about to graduate college and instead of throwing parties this summer to celebrate it, we’ll be having a baby shower and having to decorate a nursery. I won’t be getting a job because we’re having a baby. We’re young and have our whole lives ahead of us and now we’re having this baby and…” Louis sighed and put his face in his hands. “This is just so much.”

They sat in silence for a minute before Harry asked, “You… you do want this baby, right?”

Louis dropped his hands and turned on Harry. “Of course I do! How could you say that?”

“I don’t know! Because you don’t seem happy at all. I mean, I’m scared, too, but I’m excited for this. We’re having a baby, and I know we both want kids. It’s just coming a little earlier than planned.”

“A lot earlier. This is so unfair. Stuff like this just doesn’t happen to me.”

“Well, you know what? Life doesn’t always work out the way we want it to,” Harry said, his voice getting the tiniest bit icy. “I’m sorry that this is the first time you’re learning that, but some of us aren’t as lucky as you, you know.”

Louis’ face fell. “Baby, that’s not what I meant.”

“Whatever.” Harry shifted in the bed so he was lying down. He turned on his side so he was facing away from Louis. “Our appointment is tomorrow at ten. Don’t forget.”

Louis sighed before lying down, too.

He put his hands on his stomach as he drifted to sleep, wondering what tomorrow would bring.

\---

The next morning, Harry and Louis sat in the doctor’s office, waiting for someone, anyone, to come in. They’d only been sitting there for about five minutes, but you could cut the tension in the room with a knife. Both of the men were on edge and likely wouldn’t relax until the doctor came in.

Just then, a blonde woman came into the room with a wide smile on her face.

“Hello, gentlemen, my name is Dr. Davis,” she said, introducing herself. “You must be Mr. Styles?”

“That’s me,” Harry answered, holding out his hand to shake hers. “It’s great to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you, as well.” She turned to Louis. “So I guess you’re Mr. Tomlinson?”

Louis nodded. “Yes. Hi.”

“Hi. So, you’re having a baby?”

Louis just nodded again.

Harry answered for him. “Yes. We are. It’s still a bit of a surprise for both of us.”

Dr. Davis smiled. “That’s OK. It happens. But you know what? Some of the best parts of life are unexpected.”

“That’s what I’m hoping,” Harry said.

“I’ll tell you what. How about we see your baby first? Then we can talk about some other stuff?”

“OK.”

“Louis, do me a favor and just lay back on the bed for me. You can prop your legs up, too.”

As Louis got into the correct position, Dr. Davis went to a cabinet and pulled out a white tube of gel. She put on a pair of gloves and warned, “This will be a little cold.”

“Just like in the movies,” Louis joked.

Dr. Davis chuckled. Then she squirted the gel all over Louis’ belly.

Louis let out a deep breath. “Yeah, you weren’t kidding.”

“Sorry. I hope you’ll feel better in a minute.” Dr. Davis pushed the paddle of the ultrasound machine to Louis’ stomach. Almost immediately, a loud beating sound filled the room.

Louis’ eyes widened. He sat up just enough to prop himself up on his forearms. “Is that it?” he asked. “The heartbeat?”

“That’s your baby’s heartbeat,” Dr. Davis confirmed. “Nice and strong, too.”

“Oh. Wow.”

“Now let’s see if I can find your baby.” She moved the paddle around, and neither Harry nor Louis saw anything, until a little gray peanut shaped blob appeared on the screen.

“And there’s your baby,” Dr. Davis said, smiling. She pointed right to the blob, and Harry knew it was the most adorable blob he’d ever seen. He stared at the screen, unwilling to tear his eyes away from it for even a second. There it was: his baby. Right there.

Only when he realized Louis was crying did he do anything.

“Louis, what’s wrong?” Harry asked.

“I’m sorry!” Louis wailed. “I’m so sorry! I was horrible to you last night and you’re wonderful, you know that?”

Harry smiled as he started to tear up. “Louis, it’s OK.”

“No, it’s not! Harry, look, that’s our baby right there!” He pointed at the screen, at the little blob, as if Harry had been able to think about anything else for the last thirty seconds.

“I know, Louis. It’s right there. And soon, it’s going to be right here, in our arms and we can hold it and love it forever, OK?”

Louis nodded and wiped his cheeks, even though tears were still falling from his eyes.

“Would you like a picture to take home?” Dr. Davis asked gently, when she was sure the boys were ready.

Louis nodded eagerly and looked back at the screen, still in amazement.

“OK. I’ll do that for you and when I come back, we can talk about your due date and all of the fun health and safety precautions, OK?”

“Yes. Thank you,” Harry said.

“You’re welcome. I’ll be right back.”

Harry took Louis’ hand in his own as the doctor left the room. “I love you,” he whispered in Louis’ ear.

“I love you, too,” Louis said. “So much.”

Harry pressed his lips softly against Louis’, so in awe of this amazing man in front of him, and the fact that in a matter of months, they would have a beautiful little baby to love and spoil. And he couldn’t wait.

\---

As Harry opened the front door to his house, he didn’t bother to hide his smile at his boyfriend’s excitement.

Louis couldn’t contain it anymore. He pushed right past Harry, walking straight into the kitchen and up to the fridge. He grabbed a spare magnet and hung up the black and white picture he held in his hand.

After he adjusted the corners to make sure it was straight, he took a slight step back, wanting to admire the photo – the one that showed his future, what he’d always wanted.

He got so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t even notice his boyfriend enter the room behind him until he felt strong arms wrapping around his waist. Louis leaned back against Harry’s chest and rested his hands on top of Harry’s where they lay across his growing stomach. He sighed, wanting to stay in this moment for just a little while longer.

“That’s our baby, Lou,” Harry whispered in his ear. “We’re having a baby.”

“I know,” Louis whispered back. “How could I forget? It’s why I’ve been waking up every night to go throw up in the toilet and is the reason I can no longer fit into my skinny jeans.”

Louis didn’t have to see Harry’s face to know that he was rolling his eyes. He took one hand off Harry’s and brought it up to Harry’s cheek, rubbing his thumb along his jawline.

“You know I’m just kidding, babe.”

“I know,” Harry said. “I also know that you’re amazing for carrying our baby and you look absolutely perfect to me.”

Louis sighed again. “You know, every time you say something cheesy, I think to myself, ‘that’s it. He’s done it. He’s said the sappiest thing I’ve ever heard.’ But you always find a way to top yourself, don’t you?”

“Well when I have the most perfect man in the world as my boyfriend, I just seem to have constant inspiration.”

“See what I mean?”

Harry chuckled. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Louis started to yawn, bringing his hand away from Harry’s cheek and over his mouth. “I also love naps.”

“So let’s nap, then.”

Harry stepped back and took Louis’ hand in his own. With one last, long stare at the sonogram on the fridge, Louis turned and smiled at Harry, letting him know that he was ready.

Harry led them upstairs to the bedroom and Louis immediately took off his T-shirt and yoga pants, dropping them near the bedside table. He told Harry he would pick them up later.

Harry nodded as he undressed as well. “Sure you will.”

Louis lay down on the bed first, and got under the covers. Once he got comfortable, he realized that Harry was staring at him.

“What?”

“Um… Can I try something?” Harry asked carefully.

“Sure? What is it?”

Harry slid in next to him. He rested his head against Louis’ chest so that his lips were nearest to the top of Louis’ developing baby bump.

“Hi, baby,” he whispered. “It’s me. It’s your dad. We have six more months until we can meet you, and we’re so excited.”

Louis smiled and brought his hand up to the back of Harry’s head, running his fingers through his hair.

“We can find out next month what you are,” Harry continued softly. “I can’t wait, only because I really want to start buying you things. I already know your papa doesn’t want anything white.”

“Because it gets dirty and gross too quickly,” Louis argued quietly. “You’ll see, baby. When you start spitting up every day, your pretty white onesies will become a disgrace.”

“Louis, shut up.”

“Don’t say that around the baby. We don’t want that to be its first word.”

“Technically it’s two words,” Harry said.

“You’re annoying.”

“You’re still dating me.”

“Remind me why again?”

Instead of answering, Harry just started humming, instantly calming Louis down.

He continued running his fingers through Harry’s hair and felt extremely relaxed, so relaxed that he started to doze off. As he did, he thought back to that day two years ago, the day that was the catalyst for bringing Harry into his life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up, all of the books and discussions in this chapter are taken from SparkNotes and I sort of interpreted them a little. I haven't read any of the books I talk about, I'm sorry to say. So I can't promise anything, but I hope they don't sound like total bullshit! 
> 
> Also, this chapter does have references to Robin's death toward the end. Just wanted to warn you if that makes anyone uncomfortable. It is important to the story, though, I promise.

**October 2015**

 

Louis stood nervously outside of Room 134 in Coleman Hall. He had been trying to talk himself into going in for the last few minutes, knowing that once he entered the room, that was it. He was admitting that he needed help.

There were worse things, he guessed, than failing English Literature. He could be addicted to drugs, or living on the streets with nothing but an oversized sweater and pants that were a hair too short.

The problem was that, Louis had never needed help with school before. He’d always breezed through school up to this point, getting straight A’s in every subject, except for, ironically enough, gym class. The damn rope climb got him every year.

The point was, standing outside of the room for the Tutoring Club felt a bit like he was admitting defeat, that there was actually a class that was too difficult for him. Of course, the literature paper in his hand that had a big red ‘D’ on it probably could’ve told him that, too.

He heard a loud burst of laughter down the hall. A group of frat guys stood near the bottom of the staircase joking obnoxiously about something.

Louis just rolled his eyes, but then saw  _him_ coming down the stairs.  _Him,_ the guy whose name Louis didn’t even know, but always saw around campus.

The guy got to the bottom of the stairs and, keeping his head down, pushed his way around the frat boys, only two of whom actually paying any attention to him.

Louis watched the guy pull a beanie on top of his brown curls without looking back at the frat guys. As he reached the door to the building, he looked down the hallway and saw Louis standing there. The guy smiled before pushing open the door and exiting the building.

The frat guys finally wandered away, taking their loud volume with them. Louis turned back to the door, knowing he had to go in.

With a deep breath, Louis put his hand on the doorknob and turned it. He walked into the small room, which had one large desk directly to his left and a few student desks against the far back wall. There were a bunch of stereotypical motivational posters on the wall and the windows were completely uncovered, so sunlight flooded the room.

“Hey, how are you?”

Louis looked to the left, completely oblivious to the girl sitting behind the desk.

“Oh,” he said. “Hi, I’m sorry. I’m Louis Tomlinson, and sort of, need, um, a-, uh…”

“Tutor?” the girl finished for him. Louis could see the hint of a smirk on her lips.

“Yeah.”

“Well, you’re in the right spot! I’m Perrie. Have a seat.”

She gestured to the two folding chairs in front of the desk. Louis could see they were the definition of professional around here.

But Louis sat down anyway, and waited for Perrie to finish typing something on the laptop in front of her.

“OK, you said you’re Louis Tomlinson, right?” Perrie asked.

“Right.”

“Email address?”

“Tomlinsonl@smith.edu,” Louis answered. 

“What year are you?”

“I’m a junior. Just transferred here this fall.”

“What subject are you having trouble with?”

“Uh, 20th Century American Lit. It’s ENG-352.”

Perrie nodded as she typed in his answer. “What is it that you’re looking for help with?”

“Um… Well, my professor said my essays lack depth, that I’m understanding the point, but I’m just sort of skimming the surface with what I write. So, I guess I need help with… finding more details? And making more comparisons?”

Perrie nodded again. “That’s fine. I know what you mean. I have a few English lit tutors, so I’m just thinking about their strengths when it comes to the subject, you know what I mean?”

“Yeah, that makes sense.”

“OK, Louis, what kind of schedule with your tutor were you looking for? Once a week? Twice a week? Weekends only? Night time only?”

“Well, I live on campus, so it’s not a problem to meet up on nights and weekends. I guess my best days would be Tuesday and Thursday; I have two classes in the morning and then I’m free the rest of the day.”

“Do you have a preference if your tutor is a guy or girl?”

Louis raised an eyebrow. He hadn’t exactly thought about something like that.

Perrie looked away from the screen when Louis took a little too long to answer.

“Oh, sorry," Louis said. "Um, no, it doesn’t matter.”

“Perfect. OK, well the good news is that I have an idea of who I want to assign you,” Perrie told him.

“And the bad news?”

“He has a few people on his roster already, so I don’t know if he’d want someone else. No offense!”

“None taken. Can’t have my tutor getting overwhelmed and slacking on his own classes.”

Perrie snorted. “Harry would never slack on his own classes.”

“Oh, Harry? Is that his name?”

“Yeah… Will  _that_ be a problem?”

Louis frowned. He looked side to side, trying to remember if there was anybody he knew named Harry that would be difficult to work with.

When he couldn’t think of anyone, he just said, “No…? Why? Should there be a problem?”

“No, just because it’s-” Perrie stopped talking. She furrowed her brow and pressed her lips together, like she was remembering something. “You said you just transferred here this semester?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh.” She cleared her throat. “Anyway, I’ll talk to Harry and see what he thinks. If we can’t get him, I have some other people I can pair you up with. I’ll be in touch by the end of the week.”

Perrie’s tone by the end of her sentence was clearly dismissive, so Louis just nodded and stood up, headed for the exit.

As he left the office, he couldn’t help but wonder what was up with this Harry kid. Did he have problems working with other people in the past? If he did, it wasn’t affecting him now, if Perrie’s ‘has a lot on his roster already’ comment was anything to go by.

He just hoped he didn’t wind up with someone weird, or someone who actually confused him about English lit more than he already was. He’d wound up at Tutoring Club because of a second ‘D’ paper he’d gotten back yesterday. The last thing he needed was another one.

\---

On Wednesday afternoon, Louis left his English lit class with a new assignment, and he was determined to get something done for it today while the class discussion was still fresh in his mind. He went to the library and immediately went to the third floor, where it was always the most deserted, or, in more obvious terms, the quietest.

He went to a wooden table and put his bag down on it. He took a seat and pulled out his notebook and laptop, where he had typed the question he had to answer.

“ _Half of the chapters in_ The Grapes of Wrath  _focus on the dramatic westward journey of the Joad family, while the others possess a broader scope, providing a more general picture of the migration of thousands of Dust Bowl farmers. Discuss this structure. Why might Steinbeck have chosen it? How do the two kinds of chapters reinforce each other?_ ”

“What?” Louis asked. Louis read the question to himself two more times and still didn’t understand what the fuck it was asking him.

How was he supposed to go more in depth with this? Some chapters focused on a certain part of the family’s life and the other chapters had a broader story. The answer was literally in the question. How else was he supposed to explain it? And the chapters were about the same family. He could literally answer this in two sentences, and yet, he needed to write three pages by next week.

Louis sighed and sat back in his chair. He opened his notebook and looked through the notes he’d taken in class earlier, hoping that something would pop out at him and give him some kind of inspiration.

As he read, movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention.

He looked up and saw the only other person on this floor. It was the guy with the beanie that he saw in Coleman the other day.

He wore jeans and a simple Smith University sweatshirt with the hood up. When the guy sat down at a table just a few over from Louis, he pulled the hood down, revealing his shoulder-length brown curls.

‘Are you any good with English lit?’ Louis felt like asking. He didn’t, because he didn’t want to creep the guy out. His staring, however, made the guy turn to him.

Unsure of what else to do, Louis just smiled, feeling relief when the guy smiled back. He even added a little wave.

 _Stop staring at cute boys, Louis,_ he thought to himself. Louis looked down at his notes, trying to make heads or tails of this essay question. If he snuck a peek at the cute guy every now and then, no one else had to know.

\---

It was the next night, and all Louis could think about was how he needed a tutor more and more with every passing second. He was working on his English essay and he still didn’t  _get it_.

He sat back in his desk chair and tried to break the question down into parts, hoping that would help him.

When he was about eight words in, his door burst open.

“Hey, Tommo,” his roommate Niall said, walking into the room.

“Hey, Niall. How was night class?”

“It was great. When the professor gave us a break, I went to the coffee shop in Morris Building and would you believe they actually had peppermint creamer in stock? I was in peppermint heaven for the rest of class.”

“Niall, it’s October. Why do you need peppermint in your coffee?”

Niall suddenly turned serious. “It’s never too early to get in the holiday spirit, Louis.”

“I guess.”

“You still working on English stuff?” Niall asked, looking at Louis’ computer, which had a blank Word document opened on the screen.

“Yup. I’ll be here for the rest of the night, too, most likely.”

“Did you look into getting a tutor like your professor suggested?”

“Yeah. They should hopefully let me know tomorrow.”

“Well good luck. How long have you been sitting here with all of that… progress?”

Louis glared at him. “Not long.”

“Louis…”

“Since you left for night class.”

“Louis, that was three hours ago!”

“Well, I got distracted!” Louis whined.

“By what?”

“Well, my mom called, and then, I had to, you know, do my laundry, so that took some time, and my shoes were looking pretty crooked on the shoe rack, so I had to straighten them up, and did you know that the window squeaks when you open it too quickly? We should put in a work order for it.”

Niall frowned. “Louis, it’s almost November. When are we going to open the window in the next like, five months?”

“We might! It’s supposed to be a mild winter this year.”

“Louis!”

“I know! I know; trust me.”

“If you don’t get a tutor tomorrow, I’m gonna tutor you myself.”

“I knew it! You want me to fail, don’t you?” Louis cried.

Niall just rolled his eyes and went to his own desk, kicking Louis’ chair as he went.

“Ow!”

“Just get your work done, Louis.”

Louis pouted, but looked back at his computer. He had a feeling he was going to have to do a lot of bullshitting. Again.

\---

On Friday morning, Louis woke up with a new email in his inbox, from the tutoring club.

Louis sat up in his bed and quickly opened it, hoping it had good news.

_Dear Louis Tomlinson,_

_After careful review, we have matched you with a tutor for your requested class, 20th Century American Literature, ENG-352. Please find your tutor’s contact information below. Please let us know if there are any questions or concerns. Good luck with your current and future studies._

_Tutor: Harry Styles_

_Email: Styles@smith.edu_

_Cost for appointed tutor: $0/session_

Louis read the email with relief. Finally, he could have someone to help him. He paused at the $0/session part of the email. He knew that tutors weren’t expensive, but they didn’t usually work for free, either. They usually charged $10-20 for a session, sometimes more if it was a difficult subject or if there weren’t many tutors available. Louis shrugged it off, knowing a good deal when he found one. He immediately started a new email, wanting to meet up with Harry as soon as he could.

**_From: Tomlinsonl@smith.edu_ **

_Hi Harry, my name’s Louis, and I just got the email that said that you’re my new tutor for English lit. Thank you so much in advance for your help. I’m sort of a lost cause when it comes to the subject, so I hope you know what you’re in for. =/_

_I really need the help ASAP, so can you meet up at all this weekend? We should probably also figure out a schedule to meet. The email didn’t give me one? Not sure if that’s right._

_Anyway, just email me back when you get a chance. Thanks again!_

_\- Louis_

Louis read his email once through before sending it, hoping Harry was quick to check his email.

He laid back down, scrolling through his phone. A few minutes later, he heard Niall’s alarm go off. He looked over at his roommate’s bed to see Niall pulling his phone from under his pillow and tapping the screen repeatedly before sliding it back.

“Who made the morning so early?” Niall mumbled, pulling his comforter over his head.

“I hear you buddy,” Louis said.

Niall just grunted.

Louis shook his head and checked his email, surprised to see a response from Harry already.

**_From: Styles@smith.edu_ **

_Hi Louis!_

_I’m sure you’re not a lost cause! There’s hope for everyone, and I’m sure you’re no exception. We’ll work through this together, I promise._

_As for the scheduling thing, I like to set up all my own tutoring sessions, so I can give everyone the most flexibility. But I’m free this weekend! Would you want to meet tomorrow? I do have two sessions tomorrow – one at 11 and one at 3, so 9-10 works, or 1-2 or any time after 4. It’s up to you!_

_Harry_

Louis thought it over and figured he should probably meet with Harry as early as possible, just to give him the most time to work on his essay during the day. He quickly emailed Harry back.

**_From: Tomlinsonl@smith.edu_ **

_Harry, could we do tomorrow at 9? I like to work in the library if that’s OK, usually on the third floor where it’s quiet._

_Louis_

Louis hoped Harry’s response would be as quick as the first one, so he kept refreshing his inbox every minute until there was a new email.

**_From: Styles@smith.edu_ **

_That sounds great. I love working on the third floor, too. Maybe I’ve seen you before! Is there anything in particular we’ll be working on so I can try to prepare?_

_Harry_

Louis sighed as he realized he would have to get up from his bed so he could send Harry the question he had to write about.

He rolled off his mattress and booted up his laptop. As he waited for it to turn on, Niall poked his head out from under his blanket.

“Are you doing work right now?” he asked.

Louis shook his head. “Nah, I have to email something to my tutor.”

“Oh, you have one? Damn, they weren’t kidding about letting you know on Friday.”

“Yeah, it’s a good thing, I guess.”

Louis sat down at his desk and pulled up his essay, where he had the question typed at the top. He copied it and opened Chrome. In a new tab, he pulled up his school email and sent a new message to Harry.

**_From: Tomlinsonl@smith.edu_ **

_Yes, we’re talking about_ The Grapes of Wrath,  _and this is the question I’m struggling with._

“ _Half of the chapters in_ The Grapes of Wrath  _focus on the dramatic westward journey of the Joad family, while the others possess a broader scope, providing a more general picture of the migration of thousands of Dust Bowl farmers. Discuss this structure. Why might Steinbeck have chosen it? How do the two kinds of chapters reinforce each other?_ ”

_I can’t make heads or tails of it, but it needs to be three pages long by Wednesday. Please tell me you can help._

_Louis_

Louis closed his computer and got back into bed. He still had another hour before his first class of the day started, and he really didn’t feel like moving yet.

By the time he got comfortable, Louis already had a response.

**_From: Styles@smith.edu_ **

_Of course I can help. Lucky for you, I’ve already read that book. I’ll see you tomorrow at 9._

_Harry_

Louis breathed a sigh of relief. Things were looking up already.

\---

On Saturday morning, at 9 o’clock sharp, Louis sat at his table on the third floor of the library. His coffee cup sat untouched in front of him. Despite liking to have some coffee on the weekends, he was too jittery about meeting his new tutor to drink it.

He hoped this Harry guy wasn’t going to judge Louis for needing a tutor. Although, since it was his job, Harry was probably happy to have someone else to work with.

He wondered if Harry was an education major, and that’s why he didn’t need the payment for his sessions. Louis had to admit, he still wasn’t over finding out that Harry worked for free. How many other college kids worked for nothing? It had to be an experience thing for him, unless he had another job that was paying his bills somehow.

Louis sat up straight when he heard someone coming up the steps. This was it: the moment of truth.

Imagine his surprise when the guy with the brown curls, the cute one from the library a few days ago, walked in with a book bag slung over his shoulder. There were a few other people in this part of the building, so Louis didn’t know if this was Harry, or if he just liked the library as much as Louis did.

Curly saw Louis staring and, with a nervous smile, made his way over to the table.

“Are you Louis?” he asked tentatively.

“That’s me. Are you Harry?”

“That’s also me. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Yeah, you too. Uh, have a seat.”

Harry sat down in the chair across from Louis, and opened his bag. He pulled out a beat up copy of  _The Grapes of Wrath_ , and dropped it to the table.

Louis raised an eyebrow as he looked over the book. The spine had multiple creases down it, from being held open so many times and for so long. Louis could see a few post-its sticking out from between the yellowing pages and the edges of the cover were bent up.

“So you really did read the book, then?”

Harry chuckled. “Once or twice.”

“I can see that.”

“OK. So, I read over the question you sent me and I did some thinking about it. But why don’t you show me what you have so far?”

Louis’ eyes widened. “Uh…”

“Don’t be shy. I know you think you’re a lost cause, but it’s probably better than you think.”

“Well… Um…”

“What’s wrong?” Harry asked.

“Promise you won’t quit on me.”

“Of course I won’t quit on you.”

“You say that now.”

“Louis, just show me what you have.”

“I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t have anything,” Louis answered.

“Louis, come on.”

“No, seriously.” Louis opened his laptop and brought up the Word document he’d been working on for the last three days.

He turned the screen and tried not to wince at Harry’s expression.

“Louis, this just has your name, the course number and the question.”

Louis blushed. “Yeah. I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t be sorry. We’ll just take it one step at a time, OK?”

Louis nodded. “OK.”

Harry read the question off Louis’ laptop again. “How would you describe Steinbeck’s writing style? Let’s start with that part.”

“All over the place.”

Harry grinned. “Besides that. How does he write his chapters overall? What are they like?”

“Well… Like, he writes really long chapters that kind of give you all the details like a story should. Like, there’s dialogue and there’s plot advancement and you get a sense of who the characters are. And then he turns around and writes a three-page chapter about a turtle trying to turn over because it flipped over on the side of the road.”

Harry snorted. “Yeah, that’s typical Steinbeck. Does the turtle remind you of anyone?”

Louis frowned. “Of any _one_? Like, a person?”

Harry nodded.

Louis sat back in his chair, thinking about the chapter that literally talked about a car almost running over a turtle, the turtle getting flipped onto its back and then struggling to turn back over so that it could get away safely.

Wait. Struggle.

“Are you going to tell me it’s all symbolic or some shit for the Joad family trying to find work and not giving up until they do?”

Harry pressed his lips together, trying to hide a laugh.

“It is, isn’t it?” Louis whined.

“Basically?”

Louis glared. “Seriously?”

“Yeah? But there’s more to it than that, as well. Think of the time when this story was taking place.”

“The Great Depression? Oh, so it’s like, everyone was struggling and trying to get back on their feet? Literally?”

“Right. How would you have felt if you were alive during the Great Depression?”

“Poor?”

Harry burst out in laughter, clapping his hand over his mouth to silence himself, as they weren’t the only ones there.

Louis grinned, too, feeling a bit better about himself. At the end of the day, he could still make other people laugh.

“Besides poor,” Harry said when he finally stopped laughing.

“Um, I guess pissed? And... frustrated? Maybe scared, but also determined? Like, wanting to try to get a better life instead of dying in poverty?”

“Maybe a little resilient?”

“Yeah, that’s a good word for it, too.”

“Any other people sound like that?”

Louis shrugged. “Like, everybody.”

“Any specific group of people? Say, people who nobody wanted around?”

Louis thought over Harry’s question for a moment before he understood what he was getting at.

“You mean the okies?”

“Who are the okies?”

“You read the book. You know who the okies are.”

“Tell me anyway.”

Louis sighed. “They’re migrant workers, but the word ‘okies’ means scum. Basically, they’re people who keep moving around, trying to find work, but nobody wants to give them work because they’re super paranoid because land is so scarce and they’re afraid that the okies will steal their land.”

“So Louis, tell me, why did Steinbeck bother to write his story the way he did? Because like you said before, it’s all over the place. He has the story of the Joads and talks about the okies, and there’s stories about turtles that are super short. Why does he do all of that? Why not just tell the story of the Joads and be done with it?”

“Um… I guess because, he wanted to kind of show you the situations that people were in, and like, to make it more realistic, he told you the story of one family in particular, the Joads. Like, it was like he was going, ‘see, I’m not making this up. This really happened. Read about this family.’ And then he added different examples to make it more credible, like the turtle and… oh! Mae the waitress.”

“What happened with Mae the waitress?” Harry asked.

“I thought you read the book?”

Harry raised his eyebrows and then gave Louis a wink.

“Oh, I see. So, there was this waitress working in a diner, and this guy and his two kids come in. They want to buy some bread, but they don’t have enough money. So, Mae tells them no, at first, because, you know, she’s trying to survive, too, and doesn’t want to lose her job, but then the cook gets mad at her, and then she feels bad for the family, so she gives them the bread for what they have, and then gives the kids some candy, too. So, I guess Steinbeck added that as an example, because, he… didn’t want to take away from the story of the Joads, but wanted to highlight another example of how hard times were? And like, it would be easy for people to identify with it, because we’ve all wanted something we couldn’t have, and know what it feels like when can’t have it, even if it’s something as important as food.”

Harry smiled. Louis didn’t know if that was good or not.

“What does that face mean?” Louis asked.

“It means that you should probably write some of this down because you have the start of a damn good essay coming.”

“Really?”

“Really. Do you need a pen or do you want to type your thoughts up?”

“I’ll type them.”

Louis opened a new document and started typing up what he’d just said to Harry. He had a feeling this whole tutoring thing was going to work out. Very well.

\---

An hour later, Harry read the few paragraphs that Louis had managed to type while they worked.

“This looks great, Louis. I like how you said Steinbeck’s writing style was ‘varying’ instead of ‘all over the place.’”

Louis grinned. “Thanks. I think it seems a bit more professional, don’t you agree?”

“I definitely do. So, you said this was due on Wednesday. Did you want to meet up again before then to go over it before you submit it?”

“Um, yeah, would that be OK?” Louis asked shyly.

“Of course. Hang on.”

Harry reached into his bag and pulled out a pink planner with white polka dots. Louis smiled at how cute it was.

“OK, so…” Harry checked his schedule for the next few days. “We could do Monday afternoon, if that works for you. One o’clock? Or Monday night? Or what about Tuesday? What does that look like for you?”

“I have my Lit class on Monday at one,” Louis said. “But we could do Monday night. Tuesday might be cutting it close, you know?”

“Yeah, definitely. Um, is 6 too late for you? I could push it to like, 5:30, as long as my four o’clock doesn’t keep me too long with her chattering again.”

Louis laughed. “No, six o’clock is fine. Want to meet here again?”

“Sounds good.” Harry grabbed a pen and wrote down ‘Louis – 6.’

“Have I told you how much I appreciate your help?”

“You have, a few times. But it’s nice to hear. And I really don’t mind. I love talking about literature.”

“I can tell. You must be a huge nerd,” Louis joked.

“Something like that.” Harry was smiling, so Louis knew he hadn’t offended him. “I have to head out now to meet my other person. But, keep working. You’re on the right path, so I think it’ll turn out well. If you have any questions, you can always email me, or I can give you my number, too, and you can text me?”

“Yeah, that’s cool. Here, just type it in.” Louis handed Harry his phone.

“There you go,” Harry said after he saved the number to Contacts. “Text me later so I have yours, OK?”

“Awesome. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. I really have to go, but I’ll see you on Monday night?”

“Six o’clock. I’ll be here.”

“All right. Later.”

“See you.”

Harry grabbed his stuff and made his way out of the library. Louis may have watched him walk away. He couldn’t help it. It wasn’t his fault that Harry looked as good from the back as he did from the front.

Once Harry was gone, Louis turned back to his computer. He had been on a roll, and didn’t want to lose his momentum.

\---

On Monday night, Louis sat in the library, looking over his essay. He’d been working on it all weekend, and it was done, but not  _done._ It was the right length – almost four pages – and flowed well, but it was missing something. And Louis couldn’t tell what it was. He hoped Harry would be able to help with that.

“Hey.”

Louis looked up and smiled involuntarily as he saw Harry approaching his table. “Hey. OK, so my essay is sort of done, but I think it needs one more thing. I’m hoping you can help?”

Harry raised his eyebrows as he took a seat next to Louis. “You finished already? That’s pretty impressive.”

“I know. So my essay probably sucks, but it’s done.”

Harry shook his head. “You need to have more confidence in yourself about this stuff. I told you, it’s probably not as bad as you think it is.”

“Well, just read it first and then let me know.”

“OK.”

Louis slid his laptop closer to Harry so he could read it. He tried not to stare at Harry’s face while he read, but he couldn’t help it. He was nervous about what Harry would say, about how he would react, about if he would think Louis was a complete idiot.

Louis sat silently, his lips pressed together to prevent himself from asking, ‘What do you think?’ every five seconds.

“Stop looking at me,” Harry whispered when he got to the second page.

“I’m sorry. You read slow.”

“I do not. I’m reading and processing, trying to think of anything else I want to see here.”

“OK. Well do that faster.”

Harry rolled his eyes, but smiled anyway.

Louis sat back in his chair and extended his legs out in front of him, crossing them at the ankles. He laced his fingers together and placed his hands on top of his stomach. After a minute, he sat up straight again, and looked back at Harry. He was nearing the bottom of the third page, so he would be done soon.

Louis leaned forward, resting his forearms on the table in anticipation of what Harry would say.

Finally, Harry pushed the laptop back to Louis and said, “Why don’t you talk about the narration in the story? How the point of view feels like it shifts around in different chapters?”

Louis thought about it. “You mean like, how it should be one person throughout the whole story, but sometimes it feels like it’s someone who’s like, involved in the scene? Like, it should be some all-knowing narrator, but sometimes it’s actually a farmer?”

Harry nodded. “I like that. And how does the narrator – whoever it is – present the characters?”

“Um… I guess like, sad? Like, whoever it is always feels bad for the people in the book, and it’s like Steinbeck is putting his own thoughts into the story that way.”

Harry smiled.

Louis hesitated. “So is that, like, good?”

“I like it.”

“You know, you don’t have to be all cryptic all the time,” Louis said as he looked for a good spot to input his new thoughts.

“It’s not cryptic; it’s encouraging.”

“Is not.”

“Is, too.”

“Are we really doing this?”

Harry laughed. “You started it.”

“Oh, my God.” Louis looked over at Harry and said, “You’re annoying. I don’t like you anymore.”

If Louis hadn’t been staring right at Harry, he would’ve missed how Harry’s smile faltered and his eyes suddenly looked crestfallen. It only lasted a second, though, and then Harry’s smile returned and he looked away.

“Well, too bad for you, isn’t it?” Harry tried to joke, but Louis could tell he’d hurt Harry’s feelings.

“Hey, you know I was just kidding, right?” Louis turned his torso so that it was completely facing Harry. “I talk to people like that sometimes. I know, it’s super obnoxious.”

“It’s not obnoxious. And I know you were kidding. Really, it’s fine.”

“It’s not fine if I made you upset. I don’t want you to be sad. I don’t want you to hate me, either.”

Harry chuckled. “Louis, didn’t I tell you that I could never hate you? I meant that.”

“Yeah, well you’ve only met me twice. There’s still time.”

“Are you always so self-deprecating?” Harry wondered.

“Only when I’m an idiot, which is like, ninety percent of the time.”

“You’re not an idiot. I know you were kidding, OK? I’ve just had a long day, so I’m a little tired. That’s all.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. You can head out if you want; I think I’m all set here.”

“No, that’s not what I meant. Sessions are an hour, so you have me for an hour.”

Louis nodded, but still didn’t feel right about the situation. He wanted to make sure Harry knew he was sorry.

He looked at his laptop and made a quick decision.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked, watching Louis close his computer and put it into his bag.

“Since I’m pretty much set, and just have to add one or two more paragraphs, what do you say about going to the diner for some food? I’m starving. My treat, I promise.”

“You really don’t have to-”

“I know. I want to, though. Come on. We’ll get some greasy fries that are really just not good for us, and wash it down with some really sugary milkshakes that will probably make us bloated for the next like, three days.”

Harry grinned.

“Come on,” Louis urged.

“That does sound really good…”

“So let’s go. Come on. If it makes you feel better, you can still talk to me about literature and shit and we can consider it just a watered-down version of tutoring.”

Harry sighed. “You’re gonna kill me, Tomlinson.”

Louis just shrugged. “Chocolate milkshakes… crab fries… you know you want to.”

“Fine. Let’s go. But I’m paying for my own food.”

“Sure you are, Styles.”

The two of them got their things together and headed out of the library, making their way down a sidewalk to the right toward the campus diner.

“So how’d you get into this whole tutoring thing, anyway?” Louis asked as they walked.

“Um, same as anyone else, I guess? I really like English and I'm good at talking about it, so I figured I would try to help? My friend Perrie started working there our freshman year. She did some math tutoring first, and then got some more responsibilities, like matching people up and stuff.”

“Oh, yeah. She matched me up with you; said you had a bunch of people you were working with already, but she’d see if you could take me on, too.”

“Yeah, she knows my favorite subject is English, so she always tries to give me those people first.”

“How many people do you have?”

“Five,” Harry answered. “You and someone else for English lit, one person for creative writing and two people for freshman writing.”

“Wow, you’re busy.”

“Yeah. But it’s fun. I enjoy it and I get to meet new people every semester.”

They reached the diner then, and Louis grabbed the door first, holding it open for Harry.

Harry smiled as he walked in and went up to the kiosk and started to place an order for his food.

When he noticed Louis hovering behind him, he said, “There’s another kiosk, you know. You can order your food while I order mine. That’s like, the whole reason why there’s two.”

“Yeah, but it’s going on one order; why get everything separately?”

“Louis, I can pay for my own food.”

“I know, but I want to. Now hurry up. You’re taking forever.”

Harry shook his head, but finished ordering. Right as he was about to hit ‘Submit Order,’ Louis pushed his hand away.

“My turn.”

Harry sighed. “Louis-”

“Nope. I can’t hear you. Too busy ordering delicious, fatty food.”

“Louis, I really appreciate the gesture, but you don’t have to buy me food. It’s OK.”

“I know.” Louis submitted the order and grabbed the receipt that came out of the printer. “That’s just how I am, though.”

“Modest, too.”

“Yup.”

Louis gave the receipt to the guy behind the register and paid for their food. Then they sat down to wait for it to be done.

“So you’re a junior, too?” Louis asked.

“Yeah. Since you said ‘too,’ I take it that you’re a junior.”

“Yes, sir. Look at your wonderful understanding of the English language.”

Harry laughed. “That’s why I tutor it. I’m just that good.”

“Now who’s being modest?” Louis raised his eyebrows and Harry blushed. “So what are you studying?”

“Elementary Education and English, with a minor in Middle School Education.”

“I knew it.”

“What?”

“I knew you were an education major,” Louis said. “You’re too good at teaching not to be.”

“Thanks. What are you studying?”

“Uh, something very similar: Secondary Education and Drama with a minor in English.”

“Wow, that is pretty similar. I mean, drama and middle school, that’s like the same thing.”

Louis laughed. “It’s pretty much identical.”

“So why haven’t I seen you around before if you’re an English minor? Did you just transfer here?”

“Yeah,” Louis said. “I went to community college the last two years, so this is my first semester here. It was just easier, you know, like, financially.”

Harry nodded. “Got it.”

“Yeah, I don’t know how people like you do it.”

Harry stiffened. “People like me?”

“Yeah, people who go here all four years. You and my roommate Niall. This place is expensive as shit. If I didn’t have my scholarships, I never would’ve been able to go here.”

“Ahh…” Harry visibly relaxed. “Well, you know. You manage, I guess.”

“I guess. I mean, Niall’s parents are divorced, so he got a lot of money from the state, so that helped.”

Harry hummed in acknowledgement, but didn’t say anything else. Louis picked up on Harry’s hesitance right away.

“Um…”

“Order for Louis!”

The two of them looked up at the counter and saw one of the cooks waving them over.

“I got it.” Harry snatched their ‘Paid’ receipt from Louis’ hand and went up to get their food.

Louis just frowned. He didn’t know what it was, but he just couldn’t stop putting his foot in his mouth when he was talking to Harry. First the comment with Harry being annoying, and now what he said about parents seemed to rub Harry the wrong way. Pretty soon, Louis was going to just have to stop talking around Harry at all. He didn’t want to lose him as a tutor already.

\---

When Louis got back to his dorm that night, Niall was laying down on his bed.

“Going to sleep already? It’s like, 8:30,” Louis said.

“It’s been a long day.”

“I hear you.”

“Were you at tutoring?” Niall asked.

“Yeah. It’s going pretty well so far, I think.”

“Really?”

“Really. Like, my paper so far already feels stronger than the last two combined.”

“That’s good, Lou,” Niall told him. “Who is this miracle worker, anyway?”

“Uh, his name’s Harry.”

“Styles?”

“Yeah. You know him?”

Niall scoffed. “Uh, yeah? Everyone knows Harry, Lou.”

“Oh.” Louis felt like he was missing something, but he decided to just play along. He didn’t feel like playing any of Niall’s guessing games tonight. “Oh, right. Yeah, yeah.”

“I’m surprised he’s tutoring. Doesn’t seem the type.”

“Well, I’m glad he is, honestly. He’s really good.”

“Oh, yeah?” Niall asked. He raised his eyebrows a few times. “How good?”

Louis rolled his eyes. “Shut up, Niall.”

“Hey, I’m just saying! You’re all smiley after a tutoring session! Like, who even does that?”

“I don’t know. Harry’s cool. What’s the big deal?”

“Cool?" Niall asked. "I don’t think that’s the word anyone would use to describe him.”

“Well everyone’s wrong, then.”

“If you say so.”

“I say so. Now if you don’t mind, I’m gonna finish this essay so I can finally submit it and be done with it.”

“Good luck with that. Does this one at least have potential for a B?”

“Honestly? It fucking better.”

\---

On Friday afternoon, Louis walked out of his English Lit class with the biggest smile on his face. He’d gotten his essay back and he was actually happy with the grade this time.

Once he was outside the building, he took out his phone to take a picture to send to Harry, because he couldn’t wait until tomorrow to share the news.

Before he could even send it, though, he saw his intended recipient walking toward another building across the lawn.

“Harry!” he called out. He hurried past a few people and crossed the grass. “Harry!”

Harry stopped walking and turned around, smiling when he saw Louis running over.

“Hey, Louis, what’s up?”

“I got an A-!” Louis practically shouted, holding his essay right in Harry’s face.

Harry’s eyes widened and he snatched the essay from him. “You got an A-!”

“I know! My professor said he graded my paper first because I told him I got a tutor, and he wanted to see how it went. He said he was really impressed with my details in this, and my analysis of Steinbeck’s motives for writing. Can you believe it? I got an A-!”

“Louis, I’m so proud of you!”

“Thanks. Anyway, you’re sort of the first person I’ve told about this, so I hope you feel honored.”

“I do, honestly.”

Louis took his paper back from Harry, unable to wipe the grin from his face.

“Hey, Harry.”

Louis and Harry looked up, and Louis saw another guy walking up to them. But this wasn’t just any guy, it was someone that he’d seen Harry walking around campus with before. It was also someone who looked like he could bench press Louis a thousand times if he wanted to without breaking a sweat.

“Hey, Li,” Harry greeted. “Liam, this is Louis. Louis, this is Liam.”

“Hey, man,” Louis said easily.

“Hey.” Liam gave Louis a stiff nod before looking him over without any hint of subtlety.

Louis instantly felt uncomfortable, unsure if he’d done something to offend Liam.

 _Wait,_ Louis thought to himself.  _Does Harry have a boyfriend? Is Liam his boyfriend?_

“Um…” Louis started to say.

Harry noticed the sudden tension and bumped his shoulder into Liam’s. “Louis is one of the guys I tutor, and he just got an A- on his essay.”

Liam immediately relaxed, even going so far as to smile at Louis. “Oh! That’s awesome, Louis, good job!”

“Thanks…” Louis said hesitantly, unclear of what Liam’s initial reaction to him was supposed to mean. “Um, I have to head back to my room, but I’ll see you tomorrow, Harry?”

“Yup. Nine o’clock. What’s the question for this week?”

“Well, we have a new book, but we’ll get our question on Wednesday. It’s  _To Kill a Mockingbird._ ”

“Perfect. I’ve read that book, too.”

“Of course you have.”  

Harry laughed. “What are you trying to say?”

“That you’re kind of a bookworm?”

“Yeah, I can’t deny that, I guess.”

Now it was Louis’ turn to laugh.

Liam cleared his throat, looking quickly between the two of them. “Uh, H, we have to get to class.”

“Oh,” Harry said. “Yeah. Tomorrow?”

Louis nodded. “Yeah, sounds good. I’ll probably bring coffee; do you want anything?”

“Nah, that’s OK.”

“You sure?” Louis asked. “I don’t mind.”

“No, really. I don’t really drink coffee, anyway.”

Liam snorted and looked at Louis. “As if he needs any caffeine. He’s got enough energy in the morning; trust me.”

“Shut up, Liam,” Harry hissed. Then he turned to Louis and said, “I’m a bit of a morning person.”

“Yeah, just a bit,” Liam muttered. 

Harry rolled his eyes. “Anyway, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow,” Louis repeated. “Nice to meet you, Liam.”

“Yeah, you, too,” Liam said with a smile.

Harry and Liam turned and walked away.

Louis stood where he was, not sure why he felt disappointed that Harry was seeing someone.

He looked back at his essay in his hand and felt excited about it, but for whatever reason, not as much as he had before.

\---

“Well, it’s also a book about racism and losing your faith in your society,” Louis said.

“Why do you say that?”

“Don’t do this, where you make me answer all of the questions even though you know damn well what I mean because you’ve already read the book.”

Frustratingly, Harry just winked at him.

Louis sighed.

It was Saturday morning, and since Louis didn’t have a question to be working on yet, the two of them were sitting in the library, discussing  _To Kill a Mockingbird_ so that Louis might be able to get started working on his essay before their scheduled meeting next Saturday.

“OK, so,” Louis started. “Atticus is defending Tom Robinson in court, right? And Tom is clearly innocent, like there’s no way that he actually assaulted anyone, but people want to believe it because Tom’s black and his ‘victim’ wasn’t. So Atticus makes this amazing case, and is just like, if you find this man guilty, then you’re racist. He didn’t do what you think he did and he’s innocent. But then, big surprise in a 1960s town in fucking Alabama, they found him guilty. Now, we have Jem, whose mind is literally blown by the fact that justice doesn’t always prevail. You know, he sees Tom go to jail even though he knew Tom was innocent, so he’s like, well, what does this mean for the country? What does it mean for my town? Does this mean that good doesn’t always win in the end? That good people get punished for things they didn’t do? That the law isn’t there to protect everyone in the same way? He doesn’t know. And he doesn’t know how to deal with it.”

“And then you have Scout,” Harry said, “and she’s this cool little five-year-old who has never seen any kind of evil in her life. You know, she lives in this nice little town, where everyone knows each other, and everything is all fine and good. Then there’s this trial, and people are getting mad at her dad for defending a man that’s innocent. So she’s confused about how people could be upset about that. Then she sees Tom be found guilty and have to go to prison for a crime he didn’t do. Now she also is faced with this good vs. evil moral standard she hadn’t really had to deal with before. And for good reason: she was only five.”

“Yeah, but she still had her faith in people after everything that happened. It was Jem who really had his eyes opened to how, just,  _bad_ people can be.”

“Right, but up until that point, neither one of them had really faced the good and evil idea as anything more than just something in a fairy tale. And that’s just one of the themes in this book: the good and evil comparison and how it affects people differently. While Jem is, more or less, scarred, and has to change his entire outlook on life, on people, on justice, Scout sort of accepts it and is like, ‘OK, some people are evil, but it’s OK. So many more people are good, and that’s what’s important.’ Two kids in the same time, raised by the same person, just seeing a situation differently. That’s a big part of the book.”

Louis smiled as Harry finished his thought.

“What?” Harry asked.

“Nothing, it’s just, um, you’re different when you’re talking about this stuff.”

“What do you mean? Is that a good thing?”

“Yeah, it is,” Louis assured. “You’re like, more alive, more…  _passionate_. Is that a weird word to use here?”

“No. It’s accurate. I like talking about literature and having debates and stuff.”

“I can tell. It’s cool, though.”

“Thanks.”

Louis smiled and checked his watch, his eyes bulging when he saw the time. “Shit, it’s already quarter after ten. You have to go meet someone else, don’t you?”

“Oh, crap. Yeah, I do. Time flies when you’re having fun, I guess.”

Louis and Harry stood up and started to pack up their stuff.

“So I should be getting my new essay question on Wednesday, so I’ll text you if it’s anything rough.”

“Sounds good. Do you want to meet up again during the week or just wait until next Saturday?”

“We can just wait. I’ll actually try to write this essay on my own before I bother you with it.”

“You’re not bothering me, Louis,” Harry said with a laugh. “It  _is_ my job. Plus, as you saw, I love talking about this stuff.”

“I guess. But still, I’ll see you next Saturday.”

“OK.”

“So, you have any plans this weekend?” Louis asked conversationally. “Any parties or anything?”

Out of the corner of his eye, Louis saw Harry stiffen. He looked up to see that Harry had paused exactly where he was, his hands frozen on the zippers of his book bag.

“Parties?”

“Yeah…” Louis said. “Um, you know, Halloween’s in a few days, so there’s probably a few parties happening tonight.”

“Oh. Yeah, um, no. No parties for me. I don’t really like them.”

“Oh.”

Harry nodded and finished packing up. “Yeah. Um, I’ll see you Saturday, then.”

“See you Saturday,” Louis said to Harry, who was already walking away.

Louis waited until Harry was gone from the room before literally slapping himself in the head. He just had to go and say the wrong thing. Again.

\---

_Analyze the trial scene and its relationship to the rest of the novel. What themes are presented in this scene that we are meant to take away from the novel?_

Louis read the question again on Wednesday night, unbelievably excited with his luck. This had been what he and Harry had talked about on Saturday at the library. He was so prepared.

He cracked his knuckles and started a new Word document for his essay. He couldn’t wait to show Harry what he could do on his own when he saw him on Saturday.

 

**November 2015**

 

On Friday morning, Louis was sitting in the hallway outside of his last class for the day. His first class had let out early – a special gift from the professor – and Louis didn’t have anything else to do, so he went to the next one. There were still students inside, though, so Louis was quietly scrolling through Facebook, waiting for them to come out.

He looked up at a noise down the hallway, as another class was just getting finished. Students started streaming out, having side conversations in the hall away from their professor and classmates.

And then Harry walked out. He had his head down, and didn’t seem like he wanted to make any conversation, unlike other students who were happy to talk to each other even if it was just to say ‘have a good weekend!’

That had been something that Louis had noticed about Harry. Whenever he was on campus, he was alone. Or with Liam. Maybe Louis just missed it, but it seemed like Harry never walked with other friends or classmates.

Interesting.

Louis stared as Harry pulled a set of headphones out of his pocket as he walked. He was just a few feet from the stairwell when he looked up long enough to see Louis sitting there.

Louis smiled and waved, and Harry returned the gesture. Then he started walking over.

“Fancy seeing you here,” Louis said.

Harry sat down next to Louis. “I could say the same to you.”

“Yeah, my first class let out early, so I figured I’d just come here.”

“Lucky you.”

“Yeah… You all done for the day?”

“Sure am,” Harry said. “Is this your last class?”

“Yeah. It starts in like, fifteen minutes.”

“Oh, I’ll keep you company, then.”

“Really?” Louis asked. “You’ll keep me company sitting on the floor in this dirty hallway while hundreds of people just walk around us just because I’m early for my next class?”

Harry shrugged. “Yeah.”

“You’re a strange one, Styles.”

“And yet you keep me around.”

Louis watched as Harry’s face fell, like he hadn’t intended to say that.

“Um…” Harry looked away. “You don’t, um, have to answer that. Or respond to it. Or whatever.”

Louis could feel his heart breaking, at this guy, this wonderful guy, who could be so comfortable with himself one second, and then lose all of his confidence the next.

He took one of Harry’s hands in his and gave it a light squeeze. “I do keep you around,” he started, “because I like hanging out with you. And you’re the best tutor ever.”

Harry blushed. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” Louis reluctantly let go of Harry’s hand and went back to his phone.

The two of them sat in silence for a few minutes before Louis said, “Oh.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Uh, my class got cancelled,” Louis said. He had just checked his email, where a message from his professor was waiting. “Apparently, he sent it a half hour ago. Probably should’ve checked this sooner.”

“Yeah, probably.”

“Hmm… Well, OK then. Guess my weekend can begin!”

“Awesome! What will you do with all of your free time?”

“Uhh… I might go get coffee, actually. Do you want to come?”

“Really?”

Louis smiled. “Yeah! We can just go to the one in Morris. Apparently, they have peppermint creamer.”

“I like peppermint.”

“So let’s go, then. Come on.”

Louis stood up and held out a hand to Harry to help him up, which he gratefully accepted.

The two of them left the building, walking across the academic quad to get to Morris.

“So how’s your essay coming along?”

“Um, it might be sort of done?”

Harry stopped walking. “It’s  _done_?”

“Yeah. It was this awesome question about the trial scene, and I had to analyze it and then it asked me about the themes that I was supposed to take away from the book, and it was pretty much what we-”

“What we talked about on Saturday,” Harry finished. “Louis, that’s great.”

“I know. I mean, it’s not completely finished, like I still have to edit and maybe add some more stuff, but for the most part… Yeah.”

“I’m impressed,” Harry told him. They started walking again. “Wow, it’s almost like you don’t need me anymore.”

Louis laughed obnoxiously. “Yeah, right! I still have two more papers after this one, plus a final exam, and I’d like to pass this class, thank you very much.”

They reached their destination, and Harry pulled open the door, holding it so Louis could go in first.

“Thanks,” Louis said as he walked in, rubbing his hands together. The November air was starting to cool, and Louis hoped he would be able to avoid getting his annual winter cold.

The two of them approached the coffee shop, and both looked over the menu.

“What are you getting?” Harry asked.

“Probably just a medium coffee. Have to get that creamer, you know.”

“Wouldn’t have pegged you as a huge peppermint, holiday kind of person.”

“Nah, I love the holidays,” Louis said. “Christmas is my favorite. My birthday’s on Christmas Eve.”

“So it’s a good holiday, then.”

“Most definitely. I might get a bagel, too, now that I think about it. What are you getting?”

“Well, they have fruit smoothies. Those sound good.”

Louis shook his head. “Fruit smoothies. Please, Harry.”

“What’s wrong with that?” Harry asked.

“Nothing. Just, why drink your fruit when you could just eat it like a normal person?”

“Because I can get protein in it and maybe some vegetables, too, and then I won’t even taste it.”

Louis pretended to gag. “Vegetables… Who even are you?”

“I’m Harry Styles, since you seem to have forgotten. And I love fruit smoothies.”

“If you say so.”

It was Louis’ turn to order, then, so he stepped up to the register. After he placed his order, Louis moved further down the line, thinking about what else he should do with the rest of his day. Then he had an idea.

“Wait, so you were done for the day, right?” Louis asked Harry after he paid.

“Yeah, why?”

“Do you want to just come over to my dorm now? And I can show you what I have? That way you don’t have to wake up early and meet me at the library tomorrow?”

Harry shrugged. “Sure. I mean, I’ll probably still be up early, anyway. I’m a-”

“Oh, that’s right… a  _morning person._ ”

Harry laughed. “Yeah. But yeah, we can do it now. That’s fine.”

“Cool.”

After they got their food, Harry followed Louis back to his dorm.

“You’ll have to pardon the mess,” Louis apologized in advance.

“It’s fine. I won’t be bothering your roommate, will I?”

“Nah. Bastard doesn’t have class on Fridays, so he actually went home for the weekend last night after his night class.”

“Oh, wow. Lucky him,” Harry said.

“Tell me about it.”

They walked up the steps to the second floor, and then turned left at the top of the staircase to go down the hallway.

Louis unlocked the door, feeling suddenly nervous. He’d already apologized for the mess, but what if Harry didn’t like his room? What if he thought it smelled? It did, but what if Harry picked up on it? Louis hadn’t thought this all the way through.

But, they were already here, and the door was opening and there was no going back now.

“Welcome to my humble abode,” Louis joked, holding the door open so Harry could go in first.

He held his breath as he watched Harry look around the room.

“I like it,” Harry finally said.

“Don’t lie. No you don’t.”

“Yes, I do! Which side is yours?”

“Guess,” Louis challenged.

Harry raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything. He looked at both sides of the room, both with soccer posters, stacks of books on the desks and blue comforters, but that was where the similarities ended.

One side had piles of clothes all over the floor while the other at least had everything inside of a hamper stuffed under the bed. One side had a trashcan that was literally overflowing with snack wrappers while the other had one that looked like it had been recently emptied. The closet on both sides were open; one showed lots of colorful denim and T-shirts and the other had only blue or black jeans with white or black shirts and lots of hoodies.

“This side is yours,” Harry eventually said, pointing to the correct side.

“Damn it,” Louis swore. He shut the door behind him, convinced that Harry wouldn’t be running for the hills any time soon. “How did you know?”

“ _That_ tipped me off.” Harry pointed at something above Niall’s bed. Louis rolled his eyes when he saw that Harry had seen Niall’s Irish flag. Of course.

“That’s cheating,” Louis whined.

“You told me to guess. I did.”

“Not fair.”

Harry shrugged. “Sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

“You’re right; I’m not. Now let’s see that essay.”

“Oh, yeah.”

Louis went over to his computer and loaded it up. The essay was still open on his laptop, so he gestured to the chair, letting Harry know he could sit as he read.

Just like last time, Louis hovered, wanting to know what Harry thought of his paper the second he finished reading. He was a little more at ease this time, though, since he was in his own dorm room, in his own space.

He sat down on his bed and watched Harry’s eyes move side to side as he read. Louis figured it was pretty creepy to do that. He still did it, though.

After a few minutes, Harry sat back in his chair and stared at Louis.

“Oh, no,” Louis said. “What’s wrong with it? I knew it was too easy. I screwed it up somehow.”

“You didn’t screw up anything. It’s really good, Louis.”

“It’s- What? It’s good?”

“Like,  _really_ good. Better than the last one, that’s for sure.”

“You’re not kidding, right?” Louis asked. “Because if you are, it’s not funny.”

“I’m not kidding.”

“I’ll kick you. Right now.”

Harry laughed. “I’m not kidding! I really like it.”

Louis breathed a sigh of relief. “Good. I’m glad you really like it.”

“I do. What else do you want to add to it?”

“Um… I might talk a little more about how Jem and Scout’s morals came about, and how it’s important for parents to teach their kids about right vs. wrong and good vs. evil. And maybe try to paint the picture of how they would’ve been different if they’d been taught differently.”

Harry nodded. “I like it. Do you want to do it now while I’m here?”

“Not really.” Louis laughed. “I kind of want to just finish my bagel and coffee, and maybe just relax for a little while.”

“That’s fine. I can head out, and we can try to meet up during the week. Maybe Monday again?”

“No, you don’t have to. I was gonna ask if you wanted to watch a movie?”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I’m sure we can find something on Netflix. What are you in the mood for?”

“Um, I don’t know.”

“Well, let’s see what they have.”

Louis held out his hands for his laptop, which Harry brought over. But then he stood kind of awkwardly in the center of the room.

“Um, so should I…?”

Louis rolled his eyes. “Come sit next to me on the bed, Harry. Come on.”

Harry smiled and happily climbed onto the mattress. He kicked his shoes off, letting them fall to the floor.

“Your boyfriend won’t mind you sitting next to me here, will he?”

Harry frowned. “What boyfriend?”

“Liam.”

“What?” Harry snorted. “Liam’s not my boyfriend.”

“Oh. Oh, I thought- I thought he was.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. I mean, he seemed kind of protective over you when he found us talking, and he made that comment about you being a morning person.”

“That’s because he’s my best friend, and he’s seen me in the morning a lot. We’ve had a few classes together over the last two years, too.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah. And Liam  _is_ protective, but that’s just, um, that’s just who he is.”

Harry shrugged off the last part, but Louis had a feeling there was more to it than that. He didn’t want to push, though.

“Well, let’s see what we can find.”

Harry smiled and looked at the screen. “Yeah. Let’s.”

\---

A few hours later, Louis woke up in his room. His laptop was now on his computer desk, the lights were off and there was a Post-It on his face.

Louis stretched and stood up, walking over to the light switch by his door. He turned on the lights, squinting at the sudden brightness and blinking his eyes to get them to adjust quicker.

When he felt a bit more comfortable, he read the note, which he assumed – correctly – was from Harry.

_Louis, you looked so peaceful I didn’t want to wake you up. Also didn’t want to overstay my welcome. Sorry I left without saying goodbye! =(_

_Text me if you still want to meet up tomorrow, but with your essay looking as good as it does, I’ll understand if you don’t. We could also meet up Monday night again. If we do, I’m paying for the milkshakes this time. =)_

_\- Harry_

Louis smiled at the note and searched his bed for his phone, finding it in between the bedframe and the mattress.

**_Louis: you didn’t have to leave! you could’ve stayed if you wanted_ **

**_Harry: I didn’t know if that would be ok?_ **

**_Harry: I didn’t want to bother you._ **

**_Louis: you know you don’t bother me, right?_ **

**_Louis: but it’s OK. I should probably catch up on some other homework for once._ **

**_Harry: OK. Do you want to meet up tomorrow?_ **

**_Louis: that’s alright. we don’t have to. monday night sounds good, though!_ **

**_Harry: Cool. 6 in the library?_ **

**_Louis: it’s a date!_ **

Louis stopped and reread his last message, hoping Harry didn’t think it meant what it sounded like.

Although, there was a small part of him that wouldn’t have minded if he did.

\---

Over the course of the semester, Louis and Harry continued their regular Saturday morning tutoring sessions. He wound up getting another A- on his _Mockingbird_ paper, so the pressure was on to do well on the last two. Sometimes, Harry actually helped Louis with his work, other times they just talked about the book he was reading that week so he could be prepared for any possible essay questions. They also talked about other things, but mostly the books.

They also started spending time together during the week that weren’t tutoring sessions, because they just felt like hanging out. Monday night diner runs became the norm, and they usually texted each other every day.

Everything was going really well.

And then there was one day, in early December, when everything just went wrong.

The boys were in Louis' dorm room. Louis was sitting on his bed, typing up some thoughts he was having on  _The Great Gatsby._ Harry was sprawled out on the floor, highlighting some notes for a final.

And apparently, Louis thought it would be a good time to ask Harry a question that had been plaguing him for a while.

“Hey, Harry,” Louis asked while he typed. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Why don’t you charge any money for your tutoring? I mean, with all of the people you’re with and how good you are, you could make a killing.”

Louis looked away from his computer to see that, suddenly, Harry looked very tense.

“Harry?”

Harry shook his head. “Sorry. Um, no, I don’t want to charge people.”

“But why? Seriously, you would make so much.”

“Because I don’t need the money, Louis.”

Louis snorted. “You’re in college.Of course you need the money. I could definitely use the money. Niall could use the money. Liam probably could, too.”

“No. I don’t.”

“OK… Um, well I’m getting you something before we leave for break. Like, to show my gratitude and all that.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Harry, seriously,” Louis said. “I want to. I have to. Like, you saved me from failing English lit. I owe you a lot.”

“You don’t owe me anything.”

“Yes, I do. I’m getting you a gift before Christmas break.”

“Louis, keep your money,” Harry said angrily, practically growling. He sat up on the floor and fixed Louis with an icy glare. “You need it more than I do. Trust me.”

Louis raised an eyebrow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You heard me.”

“Is that some kind of dig at me?”

“What are you talking about?”

“What, because I’m a scholarship kid, I can’t afford to get you a gift? Is that what you’re saying?”

“That’s not what I’m saying,” Harry said.

“You know, I don’t appreciate that, Harry. Why would you think that just because I’m on scholarship that I can’t afford to do something nice for you? I’m not getting you a fucking Benz, but a Wawa gift card would suffice.”

Harry shook his head. “I’m not saying that you can’t afford a gift, and you know that. I would  _never_ talk that way to you, or to anybody else.”

“So what’s the big deal, then?”

“The big deal is that you don’t have to pretend! OK? You don’t have to act like you’re being nice and getting me something out of the goodness of your heart so I feel bad and buy you something in return. You really want something, then just ask. Stop beating around the bush. I thought you would be better than that.”

“Excuse me? I never asked you for anything except tutoring! And I wanted to show you how thankful I was for your help with a gift. So what?”

“Because people don’t just do that!” Harry shouted. “People don’t just buy things for people and expect nothing in return, Louis. That’s not real!”

“It  _is_ fucking real!” Louis yelled right back. “Because that’s what’s happening! But you know what, if you’re gonna be an ungrateful asshole, then forget it!”

Harry scoffed and started to clean up his stuff. “You have a lot of nerve to call me ungrateful.”

“Yeah, well you have a lot of nerve to act like a fucking prick just because I want to say 'thank you.'”

“Yeah, right.” Harry put his shoes on and stuffed his things in his backpack before slinging it over his shoulder. “It’s never just ‘thank you’ with you people. There’s always more.”

“‘You people’? What does that mean?”

“Just… everyone.” On the last syllable, Harry’s voice cracked just the slightest bit. If Louis hadn’t been listening intently, he would’ve missed it.

Harry grabbed his coat from where it hung near the door and stormed out, slamming the door behind him, leaving Louis to wonder what had happened, and wanting to know who had hurt Harry so badly that he couldn’t accept a simple ‘thank you’ gift.

\---

A week went by and Louis and Harry didn’t speak once.

Of course, Louis saw Harry around campus a lot, either alone or with Liam –  _only_ Liam – but neither one of them said a word to each other. It hurt Louis more than it should’ve, considering the semester was just about over and Louis really didn’t need Harry anymore anyway. He had taken all of his finals and would be leaving campus for winter break in two days, and after that, well, it looked like Louis and Harry would just go back to seeing each other randomly around campus.

He stood in his dorm room, folding clothes to pack when he felt the shirt in his hands getting suddenly knocked out of them.

“What the fuck, Niall?” he cried, seeing his T-shirt now on the floor.

“Stop pouting. What’s the matter?”

“Nothing.”

“Don’t give me that shit,” Niall said grumpily. “You’re pouting. You haven’t been acting like yourself all week. What’s the deal?”

Louis sighed and stared down at the floor, really not wanting to have this conversation.

“Does this have something to do with Harry?” Niall asked. 

“Why do you ask that?”

“Because I saw him in Morris yesterday and he looked worse than he did last semester.”

Louis’ eyes shot up to Niall. “What do you mean?”

“Last year. Harry on the quad. Come on. You know.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Yes, you do!” Niall insisted.

“No, I don’t know what you’re talking about Niall. Something happened last semester?”

“Yeah, stop acting. You know what I mean. Like, everyone knows.”

“Niall!” Louis yelled. “Just tell me what happened!”

“You really don’t know?”

“No!”

“Fine. Harry had a… I guess, mental breakdown last year.”

Louis’ jaw dropped. “What?”

“Yeah. It was… well. It wasn’t good.”

“What happened?”

“You might want to sit down for this.”

Louis sat on his bed, waiting for Niall to tell the story.

“OK. So, Harry’s rich. I’ll just start out with that. Like, really fucking rich. His stepdad had a lot of money in some oil company and stock market something or other. I don’t know the full extent of it, but Harry’s got money. You know how some people have off-campus apartments?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, Harry has an off-campus  _mansion_. Or,  _had_. He sold it over the summer.”

“Why?”

“Hang on. I’ll get to that. So, freshman year and the first half of last year, Harry was this super rich kid who loved to party. OK? Like, drove a Range Rover and had a BMW for fancy occasions, had people at his house every weekend, bought all his friends Rolexes for Christmas, never had to worry about any money kind of rich kid. Needless to say, Harry was pretty popular. And you know those stereotypes, of how like, rich people don’t know who their real friends are because they’re just surrounded by like, leeches who just want the lavish gifts and fun parties and stuff?”

Louis didn’t like where this was going. “Yeah.”

“Well, that fit the situation to a tee. People were seriously just after him for that. And that all became clear when, well, here’s where it gets really sad.”

“Oh, God,” Louis whispered. “What?”

“Well, Harry’s stepdad passed away before Spring Break.”

“Oh, no.”

“Yeah. So, he left Harry a shit-ton of money, more money than he’ll ever know what to do with, right? And Harry basically had two options. He could keep doing what he was doing, wasting his stepdad’s money and just partying his college years away – how he didn’t flunk out in the first year and a half, I’ll never know, but that’s besides the point – and just being a generally annoying rich kid.  _Or_ – and this is clearly the option that Harry chose – stop doing what he was doing and actually make something of himself. He got his shit together. He started tutoring and going to classes and actually participating. He stopped throwing parties and wasting the money on stuff that just didn’t matter. And like I said, he sold his house and one of his cars – I think it was the BMW – and really turned his life around.”

“This all sounds positive and uplifting, so how did he have a nervous breakdown?”

Niall sighed. “OK, so… yes, Harry turned his life around. But there were some people in Harry’s life, mostly college ‘friends,’ I think, who didn’t want to let that go. They were excited about their lavish lifestyle and, I guess, feeling important or whatever. So they wouldn’t give it up. They kept asking Harry when the next party was, or left hints about gifts they wanted – jewelry, clothes, iPads, everything. The old Harry would’ve just bought them what they wanted. But the new Harry said no and kept saying no, so they turned on him.”

“Stop.” Louis started to feel like he couldn’t breathe.

“They spread nasty rumors about Harry, about how he really didn’t have any money anymore because his family disowned him because of how much of a disappointment he was, and then they brought his stepdad into it, and talked about his death like it was just celebrity gossip.”

“Niall, stop.”

“It was bad, Lou. Like, Harry just lost it one day. It was in the quad, of all places, and there were people just, everywhere. He started yelling at them, saying how they weren’t real friends and how they just used him like the parasites they were, and they just called him ‘poor little rich boy,’ because now he had no friends and they hoped he would enjoy being alone. Harry was crying, and that guy Liam came in from out of nowhere and took him out of there and, I honestly think that’s Harry’s only real friend now… the only one who stuck by him with or without the money.”

“Niall, stop! I get it!”

Louis took a deep, shaky breath, unaware that he’d even started crying during Niall’s story.

“I’m sorry,” Niall said.

Louis just shook his head. “It’s OK. I asked.”

They stood there in silence while Louis calmed down.

“Do you want to tell me what happened, then?” Niall finally asked gently.

“Yeah… Um, I asked Harry why he doesn’t charge for tutoring. Since I didn’t know about last semester, I told him he could make so much money. And he didn’t take too kindly to that. He said he just didn’t need the money. Then I told him that I wanted to get him a gift, just to say ‘thank you’ for saving my ass with English lit this semester. He told me to keep my money because I would need it more, which I took to be an insult because I’m a scholarship kid. I mean, I know Harry would never look at me like that, but in the moment… and then he said something about how it’s not possible that someone would just give him a gift without expecting something in return. Now that I know what you just told me, that makes a lot more sense. And he said that with ‘you people,’ it’s never just a thank you; there’s always more.”

“Makes sense. After dealing with his ‘friends,’ I guess that’s just how he sees the world now.”

“I feel awful,” Louis admitted.

“I really thought you knew.”

“I can’t believe I didn’t hear it through the grapevine or something, like, just from someone else.”

They sat in silence again as Louis processed everything.

“So, what are you going to do now?” Niall wondered. 

“Well, I have to talk to him. Like, now. Before we leave for break and I never see him again.”

“Is this gonna be like, a dramatic declaration of your love? Like, rushing to his house and telling him that you were wrong and that you’re sorry and want to be with him forever?”

“Well, no,” Louis said. “One, because I don’t love him, and two, I don’t know where he lives.”

“Only one of those is true. I’ll let you figure out which one.”

“You think I like Harry?”

“I know you do. And he likes you, too, if him hanging around here with you when he’s not tutoring you is anything to go by.”

“Niall, we’re friends.”

“Who like each other. I know.”

Louis rolled his eyes. “You’re ridiculous.” He pulled out his phone. “I’m calling him, though.”

“Atta boy. Go get your man.”

“Not my man.” Louis stepped out of his room and made his way toward the common area in the middle of the hallway for their floor.

He called Harry, unsurprised when it went straight to voicemail.

“Hey, Harry, it’s Louis,” Louis said when the beep went off. “Call me, please. Right away. It’s important.”

He hung up then and just sent Harry a text.

**_Louis: please call me. I really need to talk to you._ **

**_Louis: I’m sorry for what I said. I know you’re not like that. I hope you know I’m not what you think I am, either._ **

Louis waited a few minutes before calling Harry again. It went to voicemail again. He didn’t leave a message this time. Instead, he just hung up and called again.

He called three more times before sending another text.

**_Louis: if you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m not going to leave you alone. you might as well just talk to me._ **

**_Louis: harry, I’m really sorry! I talked to niall and now I have to talk to you. come on please!_ **

**_Louis: harry, I don’t want our friendship to end like this =’(_ **

Louis hesitated before sending the last one, but he figured that he had nothing else to lose, so he tapped ‘Send.’

Louis waited a few minutes before calling again. It went to voicemail. Louis groaned and wanted to throw his phone, but restrained himself.

He took a deep breath and called again. But this time, Harry picked up.

“Louis, what do you want?” he asked.

“Harry! Thank God you answered. I need to talk to you.”

“I know. I saw the missed calls. And the texts. What do you need to talk about?”

“I didn’t know about last semester, Harry,” Louis blurted out. “I didn’t know about it. Any of it. I just found out, and if I’d known about it before, I never would’ve made my stupid money comment. And I never would’ve made you feel uncomfortable about parties or about Liam being protective or anything. I’m so sorry, Harry. Can you forgive me?”

He was met with silence. Harry wasn’t talking, and Louis was breathing heavily from rushing out all of his thoughts at once.

Harry was silent for so long that Louis checked to make sure that he hadn’t hung up.

When he saw that the call was still connected, Louis asked quietly, “Harry? Did you hear me?”

“Yeah, I heard you,” Harry answered in a strained voice. “Um, what do you mean you didn’t know about last semester?”

“I mean that I didn’t know, babe. I swear. No one ever told me. I’m so sorry about everything.”

“Don’t be sorry. It wasn’t your fault.”

“It wasn’t yours, either.”

Harry sighed so quietly Louis almost didn’t hear him.

“Do you want to come over?” Harry asked carefully, like he was afraid to scare Louis off.

“Yeah. Yeah, of course.”

“OK. Um, I’ll text you my address.”

“I’m leaving in ten minutes. I’ll see you soon.”

“See you soon.”

They hung up, and Louis sat there until the message from Harry with his address came through. Then he was up and running back to his room.

He burst inside, making Niall let out a loud squeal.

“What are you doing?” Niall asked.

“Getting my stuff,” Louis answered as he quickly put his sneakers on. He grabbed his keys and wallet. “Going to talk to Harry.”

“Yes! Get your man.”

“Again, not my man. And don’t think we’re not going to talk about that noise you just made when I get back.”

“Oh, fuck off!” Niall yelled as Louis ran out the door, not bothering to shut it behind him.

\---

Fifteen minutes later, Louis was pulling into an expensive-looking development. There were rows and rows of condos, each one looking nicer and pricier than the next.

 _Of course he lives here,_ Louis thought to himself. He found Harry’s condo easily enough, though. He pulled into the second driveway space outside of Harry’s house, number 219. He put the car into park and stepped out. Before he could make his way to the front door, the garage door started to open.

Louis stood still, watching as the door went up, revealing Harry standing in the garage.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hey. Nice place.”

“Thanks. You can come in this way.”

“OK.”

Louis locked his car, although he figured it was probably the cheapest one in a five-mile radius and therefore the least likely to get stolen.

But he walked through Harry’s garage, which had a wide assortment of tools on benches and attached to the walls and extra lawn chairs in one corner.

Harry went up to a door that led into the house. As Louis walked in, he pushed a green button next to it, which closed the garage door.

Louis followed Harry inside, and found himself in Harry’s laundry room. Then they walked through that room and got to a short hallway. They followed it down to a large foyer. There was a staircase to the right of them that most likely led to bedrooms. There was an office next to the staircase and across from it was a dining room. Louis assumed the kitchen was connected to it, because while he didn’t see that, he did see a living room with black leather sectional furniture.

Harry walked into that room and sat down. Louis sat near him, but with a few feet still between them.

“So…” Harry started.

“I’m sorry for my money comment,” Louis said.

“Don’t be sorry. You didn’t know how your comment sounded to me.”

“I am sorry, though. It was stupid. It really wasn’t necessary, and I should’ve realized that it was bothering you and just laid off.”

“It’s OK. Really.”

“And I, um, talked to Niall,” Louis continued. “And he told me what happened last semester, with your friends.”

Harry shook his head. “They’re not my friends.”

“I know. Now I do.”

“You didn’t know before? About them or my money or my- um, my stepdad?”

“No. I promise I didn’t,” Louis assured him. “But can I tell you something?”

Harry nodded.

“If I had known about it, I wouldn’t have treated you any differently than I did the last few weeks.”

Harry sighed. “You can’t say that.”

“Why not?”

“Because you do know about it. You know I have money. You know I have a house when most other kids my age are in dorms. You saw my car in the driveway. You know I don’t need money from tutoring. You do know all of it. So you can’t sit there and say that if you had known about all of this that you wouldn’t have treated me just like they did. Even if it took some time to get to be that way.”

Louis frowned, unsure of how to follow that up.

“But can I tell you something?” Harry asked.

Louis nodded.

“I liked spending time with you. Away from tutoring, even though tutoring was always fun, too. When I was with you, you treated me like… a person. And I liked that. You didn’t treat me like someone who could do stuff for you or get you into a cool club or invite you to a crazy party. I was just Harry to you. You never asked me for anything, which is why I started to get paranoid when you brought up the ‘thank you’ gift. That’s what  _they_ used to do: buy me some stuff knowing full well that I would feel like I had to do something nice for them, too. With  _them_ it was never just ‘Oh, I saw this and wanted you to have it.’ There was always an ulterior motive behind whatever they did. And there was this one guy, Grant, who was my ‘best friend’ at the time, and now...” Harry shuddered. “Now he’s not anything, but he was the worst in particular.”

“But, Harry, I’m not like that,” Louis insisted. “I promise I’m not like that. I don’t care about money. I mean, when I offered to buy you food or whatever, it really was just me being nice. I knew I had hurt your feelings that first night we went to the diner, and I wanted to make up for it. Please believe me.”

“No, I do.” Harry sighed and sat back in his seat. “I do. I know you’re not that person, and deep down, even that night, I knew it, but I just- I got scared. Scared that you were turning into one of  _them_ , too. And I didn’t want to believe that I’d lost another friend because of my stupid money, money that I don’t even touch besides getting this house and paying off my college tuition. It’s just not important, you know? In the grand scheme of things, money is the least important thing to me. My family is important. My friends are important. My real ones are, anyway. After my stepdad died, I…”

Harry trailed off, and Louis moved closer to him, taking one of his hands in his own.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

“No, I want to,” Harry said. “It’s just hard.”

“I know. Take your time with it.”

Harry took a deep breath. “Um… After Robin died, just, all of the parties and blowing through my money and everything just seemed so pointless. Like, I was wasting my life away. So I stopped spending the money and I sold the house I had – it was bigger than this one, actually – and tried to do better with myself. And then  _they_ turned on me because if I wasn’t buying them presents or throwing extravagant parties, they didn’t want anything to do with me. I really learned who my real friends were.”

“Like Liam?” Louis asked.

Harry nodded. “Definitely Liam. Liam was there for me when no one else was, and he’s the only one who’s still here. He’s a real friend. And I thought you could be, too.”

“I am,” Louis promised.

“I know.” Harry smiled. “I know you are. I was just-”

“Scared that I wasn’t?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, will you let me prove to you that I’m a real friend? I mean, winter break is coming up, but next semester?”

“You don’t have to prove anything to me, Louis,” Harry said. “You just have to be there.”

“I know. And that’s what I’m going to do.”

Harry smiled again, even wider than before. “OK.”

“Cool. So, um, did you have any plans today?”

“No, actually. All of my finals are done, and I’m heading up to my mom’s tomorrow.”

“Great! Do you have any popcorn in this place? Let’s watch another movie. I promise I’ll stay awake for this one.”

Harry laughed. “Of course I have popcorn. I am still a college kid, after all.”

“It’s not like that fancy, gourmet shit, is it? Like, the kind you have to put in a pan and pop yourself?”

Harry blushed. “Um… No?”

Louis rolled his eyes before rubbing his temples with his fingers. “You’re killing me, Styles.”

“Sorry! It’s really good, though. I promise.”

“If you say so. Let’s go make it.”

“OK.”

They went into the kitchen and as Harry started getting out the tools they would need to make the popcorn, Louis just smiled.

He had been scared for a little while there, but he knew that he and Harry were going to be just fine. It might take some work to get their friendship right back to where it had been, but Louis was OK with that.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a lot of tears and emotions in this chapter. Blame Louis' hormones for that!

**June 2017**

 

Louis poured himself another glass of sparkling cider before making his way out to the living room of the new house. Before he did, though, he stopped at the fridge to stare at the sonogram of his happy baby.

In another week, he and Harry would be finding out what they were having, and he couldn’t wait to start buying things for his little prince or princess.

“Lou!” Harry called out to him from the living room. “Babe, you all right?”

“Yeah!” Louis called back. “Coming!”

With one last look at the picture, he turned around and went back to the living room, sitting down on the couch next to Harry.

It was their housewarming party, a small one that they had wanted to throw at a later point in the summer, once they were more adjusted into the house, but once they realized how much they still had to get done before the baby arrived, they figured they should have it sooner rather than later.

After finding out that Louis was pregnant back in May, Harry decided that they would need a bigger house than Harry’s townhouse, even though Louis insisted it would be fine. But since the house was actually Harry’s, with Louis just staying over almost all the time, he sold it and bought this new one, with five bedrooms and four bathrooms, a three-car garage, a pool in the spacious backyard and state of the art security. Louis told Harry over and over that it was too much, that they didn’t need a huge mansion when they were only having their first baby.

 _“But it_ is  _only our first baby, right?” Harry asked. “I mean, you want more, don’t you?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“With me, right?”_

_Louis snorted. “Of course with you.”_

_“Then it’s OK. We’ll need the space. Besides, I got a good deal on the place.”_

Louis never asked what a ‘good deal’ meant for a five-bedroom house, and honestly never planned to. The price tag would probably make him faint, anyway.

Then, with the general chaos of their graduation last month, they still didn’t have time to get the house the way they wanted it because their families were too busy giving them graduation parties.

So now, here they were, still with several packing boxes located randomly around the house and kitchen cabinets getting reorganized once a week.

But it was home, and right now, before the baby took over the rest of their lives, was the best time to have a party to welcome their friends into it.

“Are you doing any more work to the place?” Liam asked, taking a sip of his beer.

“Is that an offer to help?” Louis joked.

“I guess, if you need it, I could help with painting and stuff.”

“Aww, that’s so nice, Liam,” Niall said. “I, on the other hand, will not help with that. I’ll help with moving furniture, though.”

“I think they have most of that done already, though, Niall,” Perrie pointed out.

“I know.”

Everyone laughed, and then they heard a knock at the door.

“Oh, that must be Gemma,” Harry said, standing up and running to the door.

“Oh, you didn’t tell me Gemma was coming!” Sophia said.

“She was so excited,” Louis told her. “She actually helped us find this place. We had no idea where to even look, but she has a friend who lives a few miles away and always had nice things to say about the area, so we checked it out.”

“Hi, everyone!” Gemma said as she entered the room, announcing her presence. “There’s my favorite niece or nephew!”

She went right to Louis’ side and put both hands on his stomach. “How are you feeling?” she asked him.

“Good. Hi, Gemma.”

“Oh, right. Hi.” She leaned up and quickly kissed him on the cheek. “Sorry about that.”

Harry came back into the room with Michal, Gemma’s boyfriend, the two of them in a discussion about something that Louis couldn’t make out.

But then Harry and Michal both looked fondly over at Louis and Gemma, and then Louis had a good idea.

“So what were we talking about?” Gemma asked, addressing the whole room. “And is there wine? I see wine glasses.”

“I’ll get you a glass, babe,” Michal said.

“I’ll show you where everything is,” Harry offered.

The two of them left the room, and Louis answered Gemma’s question.

“We were talking about if there was anything we wanted to still do to the house.”

“Oh, fun! Is there?”

“I don’t think so,” Louis said. “Like, the house is brand new, so everything is in excellent condition. We talked about maybe just painting some of the walls, adding some more color? But with me being pregnant, we might have to make it like, a weekend job and recruit everyone to help, and I’ll stay at my mom’s while all of the paint is drying.”

“You mean you’ll hire painters to do that, right?” Gemma asked. “That’ll be much quicker.”

“Yeah, but why pay someone to do what we have friends volunteering to do?”

“Yeah, I’ll totally help,” Perrie offered. “I love painting.”

“So will I!” Sophia joined in. “I call the nursery, though.”

“No way,” Gemma said. “If everyone else is helping, I want to help, too. The nursery’s mine.”

“None of you will be getting the nursery,” Harry decided, walking back into the room with Michal, who gave Gemma a glass of wine. “If anyone’s getting that, it’ll be me or my mom.”

“Not fair. Why does she get it?” Gemma asked, genuinely seeming offended.

“Because it’s her first grandchild, so she sort of gets first dibs.”

“Well it’s my first niece or nephew! What do I get?”

“Lots of presents for the baby, Gem,” Liam answered. “That’s what you get.”

Everyone laughed and Gemma just smirked.

“Ha ha,” she said. “I mean,  _obviously_ I’ll spoil the kid. Guess I’ll just have to settle on furnishing the nursery.”

“Yeah, have you started thinking about what you want that to look like?” Perrie asked.

Louis scoffed. “Yeah, right. We just moved in two weeks ago and still have boxes that we haven’t unpacked yet. Plus, we don’t even know what we’re having yet.”

“When do you find that out?” Niall asked.

“Next week,” Harry answered. “So, seven more days and then we’ll let you all know.”

“Are you planning one of those gender reveals?” Michal wondered. “Like, balloons or cake or something?”

Harry and Louis exchanged a glance.

“I don’t think so,” Louis finally said. “I mean, everything about this pregnancy has been a surprise and happened pretty quickly, so we might just keep that part simple, with like a text or something.”

“But you have to have a party,” Gemma insisted.

“No, we don’t. I mean, in the last three weeks, we’ve had two graduation parties, and the four of them are having parties at some point in the summer,” Louis replied, referring to Niall, Liam, Perrie and Sophia. “Also, we’ll be having a baby shower probably in September. We’ll be all partied out in the next few months.”

“I guess.”

“Well, is that OK with you, babe?” Louis asked Harry, realizing he hadn’t checked.

Harry just nodded, though. “Of course. Whatever you want, you know that.”

“I just wanted to make sure.”

“It’s fine. I agree with you. We have enough going on. We don’t have to worry about planning a gender reveal party, too.”

“OK.” Louis turned back to everyone else. “So we’ll text you guys next week about what we’re having.”

“Can’t wait,” Perrie said. “Also, I’m just going to go ahead right now and say that this baby should probably be named after me in some way. You know, since I’m the reason you guys got together.”

“Whoa, if anyone gets the kid named after them, it’s me,” Gemma said. “I’m going to be the favorite aunt.”

Louis frowned. "Um, I have five sisters..." 

“I’m pretty sure I deserve something,” Niall cut in, ignoring Louis entirely. “I mean, I’m the one who saw it first that the two of them wanted to be together.”

Liam scoffed. “You were not! That was me.”

“Was not. You didn’t even like Louis when you first met him.”

“Sure I did.”

“You kind of didn’t, Liam,” Louis gently told him.

“I just wanted to make sure you weren’t like everyone else,” Liam replied. “Had to make sure you were good enough for my friend. That definitely deserves some credit.”

The four of them went back and forth for a while, each arguing their point over why the baby should be named after them.

Sophia and Michal instead turned to each other and started talking about Michal and Gemma’s recent trip to Paris.

While that was going on, Louis turned to Harry and asked, “Just making sure… We’re not naming the baby after any of them, are we?”

Harry took a sip of his drink and shook his head. “Nope.”

“OK. Good.”

\---

As Louis got dressed, he couldn’t keep his mind off what he and Harry were going to do today. It was time –  _finally_ – to find out if their baby was a boy or a girl.

Louis was convinced it was a girl. His mom was, too. Despite finding out that there was only one baby in Louis’ belly, Harry still joked that they would be having twin boys. Since twins ran in Louis’ family, it wasn’t a complete impossibility, but based on the fact that Harry had one sister and Louis had five, the idea of two boys at once seemed a bit like a pipe dream.

Louis went up to the full-length mirror in their bedroom to make sure he looked all right. He was in his standard outfit of yoga pants and one of Harry’s T-shirts. Now that he was nearing the halfway mark of his pregnancy, it was all that fit him until he bought more paternity clothes. He turned to the side, examining his bump.

It had popped in the last couple of weeks, making it undeniable that he was expecting. He ran his hands over his belly, wondering what the baby would be like. Would it be athletic like Louis in soccer? Or more like Harry and take up boxing and weightlifting? Would it be creative with art like Harry or with words like Louis? Would it be loud and outgoing like Louis or have more of a dry sense of humor like Harry?

He couldn’t wait to find out. He just had to make it until November.

He was so focused on his reflection that he didn’t realize Harry had entered the room.

“You almost ready, babe?” Harry asked quietly.

Louis slowly pulled his eyes from the mirror to see Harry leaned against the doorframe of their room. He had a soft smile on his face, watching Louis’ movements.

Louis nodded. “Yeah, I’m ready.”

“You look beautiful.”

Louis smiled. “You have to say that.”

“No, I don’t.” Harry walked over to Louis and stood behind him. He wrapped his arms around Louis’ shoulders and kissed the back of his head. “I don’t have to tell you that you look beautiful carrying our baby. I don’t have to tell you that you have a glow about you or that I’ve never seen you happier than when you’ve been pregnant. I don’t have to tell you any of that but it doesn’t make it any less true.”

Louis felt himself tearing up and tried to wipe his eyes before he started completely crying. He could already see Harry smiling in the mirror.

“Babe, don’t be upset.”

“I’m not upset,” Louis cried. “It’s the fucking hormones.”

Harry chuckled and turned Louis around, pulling him closely against him. Louis buried his face into Harry’s chest and sobbed quietly while Harry rubbed his back and made comforting shushing noises.

“It’s OK, babe,” Harry whispered. “It’s OK.”

After Louis finished crying, he just held onto his boyfriend, the smell of Harry’s cologne flooding his nose. He’d always loved that smell, in all of the past year and a half that they’d been together.

It had always been one of the most attractive things about Harry – his smell. That and the curls he’d chopped off a few months ago, his strong arms, his brilliant green eyes, and of course, there was his…

Louis took a deep breath. He nosed at Harry’s chest through his shirt, wondering why he was still wearing it. He put his hands under the hem of it, squeezing Harry’s adorable love handles that he just couldn’t get rid of and ran them up his back.

“You feel better now?” Harry asked gently.

Louis nodded and looked up at Harry. He captured his lips in a rough kiss and giggled at the surprised noise that Harry made.

“I guess you do feel better,” Harry said when Louis pulled away.

“I want to suck you off,” Louis told him.

“What?”

“Then you can suck me off. Come on.” He reached for the button on Harry’s jeans, pouting when Harry pushed his hands away.

“Louis, stop. We have a doctor’s appointment.” He tried to step back, but Louis just took a step forward and grabbed Harry around his waist.

“So?”

“Louis, we don’t have time,” Harry said in a strained voice. He was struggling, though, and Louis knew it. He could tell by his eyes.

“Please, Harry,” Louis begged. “Please? Please?”

Louis leaned up and attached his lips to Harry’s neck, starting out with soft kisses until he got to the special spot under Harry’s jaw that he knew really got him going. He sucked the skin into his mouth, running his tongue over it before nibbling at it gently with his teeth.

“Louis, come on,” Harry said weakly. He couldn’t stop his hands from running all over Louis’ body, though. “Babe, we have to go.”

Louis smiled and pulled off Harry’s neck, seeing the small red mark he’d left behind. Then he cupped Harry through his jeans.

“You sure about that?” Louis asked seductively.

When Harry didn’t answer, Louis started unbuttoning Harry’s jeans. He knelt down and pulled them down to his ankles. He grabbed Harry’s briefs and slowly tugged them down, as well, coming face to face with Harry’s very red, very hard dick.

Louis took it in his hand and immediately licked a broad stripe up the bottom of it. When he got to the tip, he took it into his mouth, suckling on it for just a moment before sinking down.

“Fucking hormones,” Harry muttered.

Louis pulled off. “What was that?”

“Your hormones will be the death of me.”

Louis just winked. He sank back down on Harry’s cock, running his tongue all around it as he bobbed his head. When he went down as far as he could go, he hollowed out his cheeks and slowly pulled almost all the way off, letting his lips drag across Harry’s dick. When he got to the tip, he flicked his tongue across it, lapping up all of the precome that was already gathering there.

He slowly sank back down, able to go almost all of the way. He wrapped one hand around the part of Harry’s cock that his mouth didn’t reach and started to move his head and hand up and down in sync.

“Shit,” Harry moaned. He put his hands on either side of Louis’ head and Louis stilled.

With one look up at Harry, he dropped his hold and put both hands behind his back. He waited for Harry to do what they both knew was coming.

Louis kept his lips in a tight circle as Harry shifted his hips forward, moving slowly at first, giving just shallow thrusts.

When he was sure Louis wasn’t going to choke, he picked up his pace. He had been close when Louis put his hands behind his back. He knew it wasn’t going to take much longer.

Louis made sure to breathe through his nose as Harry’s thrusts got more erratic. His cock felt heavier on his tongue as he moved, so he knew Harry was going to come soon.

“Fuck,” Harry said. After a few more thrusts, he pulled out of Louis’ mouth and wrapped a hand around his cock.

Louis kept his tongue out as Harry jerked himself and closed his eyes as Harry started coming, catching as much as he could. Some got across his cheeks, but he wasn’t bothered by it.

Harry let out a shuddery breath as he finished, and stood there heavily breathing for just a moment. He watched Louis run his index fingers across his cheeks, getting everything off his face and sucking his fingers into his mouth.

“Fucking tease,” Harry said.

Louis pulled his fingers out with a pop. He grinned and said, “Your turn.”

“Get on the bed.”

Louis giggled and got up as quickly as he could with a growing belly in his way. He sat on their bed and leaned back, holding himself up on his forearms.

Harry walked slowly over to him and when he was close enough, ripped Louis’ yoga pants and underwear down. He threw them behind him and knelt down between Louis’ legs.

Without warning, he grabbed Louis’ knees and pushed them slowly forward so that his bent legs were in the air.

“Is this good?” Harry asked, wanting to make sure the position wasn’t uncomfortable for Louis.

“It’s good.”

“Good.” Then he dove in, shoving his face between Louis’ cheeks and licking over his hole.

“Fuck!” Louis dropped his head back as Harry lapped over his rim. He could feel Harry kissing and sucking there and Louis’ toes were already beginning to curl.

“Harry!”

When his boyfriend didn’t respond, Louis grabbed the comforter and squeezed it tightly, needing something to hold. Harry just knew how to use his tongue so well, and Louis felt so good he could barely breathe.

Louis could feel himself heating up as Harry licked him out, and he didn’t know what else to do.

“Harry!” he cried out again.

Harry just hummed before pulling off. “Did you say something?” he asked.

He didn’t give Louis a chance to actually answer, because then he was wrapping his lips around Louis’ cock and sinking down.

Louis moaned and made himself turn his attention back to Harry. He watched Harry bob his head up and down on his dick. Louis wished he could see his beautiful eyes, but he couldn’t, as they were closed.

“Harry,” Louis said. “I’m gonna come.”

With those words, Harry pulled off Louis’ dick and wrapped a hand around it instead. He started to tug Louis off and returned his lips to Louis’ hole, licking across it and poking his tongue just inside.

It was quickly too much. The hormones had made Louis much more sensitive to everything, and the feeling of Harry all over him was no exception.

“Oh, God,” Louis yelled as he came, spilling out over Harry’s hand. He felt himself clench around Harry’s tongue, too, and the realization made him come just a bit harder. When he was finished, he slowly fell back against the mattress, trying to catch his breath. He felt Harry take his cock into his mouth once more, just to get him as clean as possible.

“Baby,” Harry whispered. “We really have to go now.”

Louis started laughing. He opened his eyes to see Harry licking his hand clean, a smile on his lips as he did so.

“Yeah, we probably should, huh?”

Harry put one knee on the bed and leaned forward, kissing Louis softly on the lips. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

\---

Once they were in the car, Louis called the doctor to let them know that they were on the way, but would be late. Luckily, it was only by about ten minutes, so they could get into the office not too long after their original appointment.

“So, Mr. Tomlinson and Mr. Styles,” Dr. Davis started, “we’re finding out what you’re having today, aren’t we?”

“Yes, we are,” Louis said. He took a seat on the bed, leaning back and propping his feet up.

“Any ideas before I actually start?” Dr. Davis turned down the lights before pulling a white bottle of gel out of her cabinet. She sat down on a rolling stool next to the bed, waiting for their answer.

“I still think it’s twin boys,” Harry answered immediately.

“He’s not actually serious about that,” Louis told her. “I think it’s a girl, though.”

“You never know. There could be another one hiding in there. We could be the first in the family to have twin boys.”

“So, you already told me that twins run in your family, Louis, but I take it boys aren’t common in either of yours?” Dr. Davis asked as she pulled on a pair of gloves.

“Not at all,” Louis said. “So it would definitely be a shock, but I can’t see it happening.”

“Well, let’s see then.”

Dr. Davis popped the cap on the bottle in her hand and warned Louis, “This will be a little cold.”

“Not the first time I’ve heard that,” Louis joked.

Dr. Davis just smiled. Then she squirted the gel all over Louis’ belly.

Louis let out a deep breath at the familiar sensation.

Dr. Davis grabbed the paddle for the ultrasound machine and pressed it firmly to Louis’ belly.

A loud beating sound quickly filled the room.

“There’s the baby’s heartbeat,” Dr. Davis said.

Louis smiled at the screen and held out a hand. Harry quickly took it in his and gave it a light squeeze.

“And there’s your baby.”

“And it’s still one, right?” Louis asked for confirmation.

“Yes, still one.”

Harry shrugged. “We’ll see.”

Louis just rolled his eyes.

“Now, were you taking bets on what the baby would be? We have a lot of couples who do that.”

Louis laughed. “Not that I’m aware of.”

“Nah, it’s just for fun,” Harry said.

“OK. Well then, Louis, it looks like you were right.”

Louis gasped. “We’re having a girl?”

“Yes. You will be having a baby girl in November.”

Louis let out a squeal of excitement and clapped a hand over his mouth. Harry kissed the side of his head and brought their joined hands up to his mouth so he could kiss Louis’ hand. Louis could feel himself tearing up already. He sniffled, trying to hide it, but Harry already knew what was up.

“Babe, it’s OK,” Harry said gently.

Louis shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut.

“Louis…”

“I don’t want to cry again today,” he got out before breaking down in tears.

“Lou, it’s OK.”

Louis could hear Harry trying not to laugh at him, which made him cry even more.

“Here are some tissues,” Dr. Davis said. “I’ll give you some time alone, and then I can print out another picture if you would like.”

“That would be great; thank you,” Harry told her.

Louis heard the door to the office open and close. Harry wrapped an arm around his shoulders, pulling him close to him. For the second time that day, Harry held onto Louis, rocking him back and forth and comforting him with quiet noises.

“We’re having a little girl, Louis,” Harry whispered.

“I know,” Louis replied tearily. “A little princess. God the girls will have a field day when we tell them.”

“I know. But we’ll have so much help raising them.”

“I know.” More tears started falling down Louis’ cheeks. “They’ll be so great.”

Harry smiled. “They will be. And so will you.” He pulled back just enough so that he could see Louis’ face. When Louis looked up, Harry let go of his hand and used his thumbs to wipe Louis’ tears away. “And you still look beautiful.”

Louis stared at him for a moment before letting a small smile spread across his face.

“I love you,” Harry said.

Louis tilted his head up and puckered his lips for a kiss, which Harry was only too happy to give him.

“I love you, too. We’re gonna be dads.”

“We are.”

“To a little girl!” Louis’ smile got even wider.

“We are,” Harry repeated. He pecked Louis’ lips twice more, happy to just let this moment between them last a little bit longer.

 

**July 2017**

 

“What do you think about red?” Louis asked one night, laying in bed. He had his computer out on his lap, looking through different ideas for nursery themes. He and Harry had already decided against regular pink, but still hadn’t picked a definite color. But the theme he was looking at would nicely complement the surprise that Louis wanted to add to the room.

“Red’s nice,” Harry said, coming out of their bathroom. He got on the bed and slid over next to Louis to see the[ picture](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/f8/4b/79/f84b796c1bfed68bd9a00ddb0df15835--baby-girl-rooms-baby-girls.jpg) that Louis had up on the screen. “Oh, that’s pretty.”

“I think so, too. I mean, we don’t have to put up the paneling like in this one, but I like the idea of that red color with maybe white on the bottom, like the last third of the wall could be white? But I really want that sort of frame that’s in this one.”

“Would you want to put up pictures there, too?”

“Yeah,” Louis answered quietly.

“Then we’ll put pictures there.”

“OK. I was thinking three pictures like in this one. The ones on the end could be shots of each of us with her, and then the middle could be just her. Or it doesn’t have to be.”

“I love it.” Harry told him. He ducked his head and kissed Louis’ belly. “And I love you, baby girl. And your papa is OK, too.”

Louis chuckled. “Rude. Why do I like you again?”

Harry glanced up. “Because I’m awesome.”

Louis just smiled. Two years ago, Harry would’ve frozen at that question. But now? He could joke right back. Louis loved that.

“I guess,” Louis finally said.

Harry winked and moved down the bed so that he could rest his head on Louis’ chest.

“Hi, baby,” he whispered. “How do you feel about red for your room? Hmm? Is that a good idea? Your papa has all the best ideas, doesn’t he? He’s pretty cool. I’m not that cool, so I hope you take after him in that way.”

“You’re cool,” Louis said. He put a hand on top of Harry’s head and ran his fingers through his short hair.

“Nah. Baby, would you believe your pop called me a bookworm once? Bookworms aren’t cool.”

“Yes, they are. And I was flirting with you, by the way, when I said that.”

“You flirt by calling people bookworms? That’s a little-”

Louis suddenly gasped, sitting straight up.

“What?” Harry shot up, as well, turning to face Louis. “What’s the matter?”

“Um…” Louis started. “Keep talking.”

“What?”

“Keep talking!” Louis grabbed one of Harry’s hands and put it on the side of his belly. “Go!”

“Um, uh, baby, your pop’s looking at me with some crazy eyes if I don’t keep talking, and I don’t know what else to say. But, I think you’re kicking, and I really want to feel you kick, so just go ahead and kick.”

“Keep going.” Louis moved Harry’s hand down a little bit.

“Um, I think papa just wants you to start kicking so he can start making Mia Hamm comparisons,” Harry said. “But you and I both know that you’re actually punching, because you’re going to take boxing lessons with me. Isn’t that right?”

“Shut up.”

“Shh! Louis, I’m having a conversation with our baby here.”

“Oh, my God.”

“Your Aunt Gemma and Aunt Lottie already said that they would help you when you want to dye your hair,” Harry continued. “They can’t wait to try some pastel colors out for you. And Aunt Fizzy is going to teach you all about journalism and politics. Although I’m sure you’ll be plenty outspoken because of Papa.”

“You’re not funny,” Louis said.

“All of your aunts can teach you about makeup and fashion, actually, if you don’t want to talk to me about it. Except Aunt Doris. She’s too young for any of that right now, but she’ll teach you how to beat anybody in a foot race. And Uncle Ernie? Forget it. You’ll get a lot of injuries following him around. He’s a regular daredevil, so get ready to jump down from the top of the monkey bars if you hang out with him at all-”

Harry stopped talking as he felt a strong fluttering against his hand. “Oh, my God.”

“That’s our baby in there, Harry.”

Harry looked up at Louis and then back to his stomach. “Oh, my God.”

Louis giggled. “I know! Isn’t it exciting?” He rubbed small circles into the side of his belly and looked at Harry, surprised at what he saw.

“Babe, it’s OK,” Louis said softly.

“I know it is,” Harry sniffled. Tears were starting to peek out from the corner of his red eyes. “I know.”

“Don’t cry! We can’t both be emotional.”

“Well it’s exciting!” Harry cried. “Louis, she’s really in there.”

“I know, baby.” Louis put a hand on Harry’s back and started rubbing up and down. “She’s really in there, and she’ll really be here soon.”

Harry sniffled again, but couldn’t keep up with the tears falling down his face.

Louis smiled and leaned back, getting comfortable again. “I really should make fun of you for this, since you always laugh at me when I cry. But I won’t.”

“Thank you.” Harry kissed Louis’ stomach and rested his head against Louis’ chest again. Then he whispered, “I can’t wait to meet you, baby girl.”

“Me, either,” Louis said.

They sat that way for a while, neither one of them ready to let go of this moment.

\---

“Louis! Can we get this? Please?”

Louis and Harry were in a baby boutique called Mamas and Papas, a shop that had traditional baby items, but also had things that were friendlier to same-sex parents.

Louis stopped looking at the ‘Lucky to be Loved By Two Daddies’[ onesie](https://img1.etsystatic.com/137/0/11071203/il_570xN.1028798153_2hi6.jpg) in his hand to see what Harry was so excited to show him. When he saw it, he rolled his eyes.

“Harry, we’re not putting that on the registry.”

“Why not?” Harry asked. “Come on! It’s funny!”

“Babe, that’s so cheesy. Even for you.”

Harry pouted, but held on tightly to the sign in his hands that read ‘Welcome to My Crib!’ in pink and purple swirly letters.

“Come on,” Harry whined. “Please?”

“No.”

“Please? Put it on the registry. Someone will get it.”

“Who would ever buy that?” Louis wondered. “Seriously. Who?”

“My mom will. I’ll text her right now. Don’t think I won’t.”

Louis sighed, knowing he was fighting a losing battle. Without a word, he held up the scanner, and with the push of a button, added it to their baby’s registry.

“Yes!” Harry cheered. “Thanks, baby.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Louis fondly rolled his eyes as Harry kissed him on the cheek. “Have you found anything else that you like yet?”

“Yeah, would you be interested in matching clothes?”

“I’m listening.”

“There’s a [set ](https://shirtsforyou.net/8463-thickbox_default/papa-bear-and-baby-bear-matching-t-shirt-and-onesie.jpg)that comes with a onesie that says ‘Baby Bear’ and two shirts that say ‘Papa Bear,’” Harry told him. “I would totally rock that.”

“I like it. We can add that.”

“Cool. And of course, there’s some blankets that would look really cute, and some bibs. You know, the boring stuff.”

“They’re not boring; they’re necessities.”

“Same thi- Oh, my God, we have to get this!”

Harry rushed off and Louis chuckled at Harry’s excitement.

“Louis, look how cute this is!” Harry came back clutching a hooded, pink[ onesie](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/2f/c3/0c/2fc30cd76e9943fb8e6ce66792f03116--cute-baby-clothing-auntie-baby-clothes.jpg) with purple spikes down the back, so when the baby wore it, she would look like a dinosaur.

Louis smiled. “That  _is_ really cute.”

“I know! Come on, add this, too.”

With no hesitation, Louis scanned the tag. How could he refuse, looking at the happiness on his boyfriend’s face.

“This place is like Disney World, but for baby shopping.”

“It is pretty great, isn’t it?”

Harry walked off to put the onesie back, and to look for more things.

Louis wrapped an arm around his belly. He leaned down and whispered, “That’s your daddy. He’s amazing, I promise. He’s a little goofy, and makes awful jokes, but you’ll love him a lot.”

“Louis, look at this!” Harry yelled across the store.

With a fond sigh, Louis made his way over. “Sorry,” he apologized to the people he passed, whose shopping was probably disrupted by Harry’s excitement. Louis couldn’t find it in him to care too much, though.

 

**August 2017**

 

Liam sat at the dining table, trying not to gag as he sat across from Louis, watching him eat.

He and Niall had come over for dinner that night, and Harry had already warned them that Louis would be eating something a bit different than the rest of them.

The meal that Harry had prepared was a simple chicken fettuccine alfredo, served with garlic bread and mixed vegetables. But it was what Louis was adding to his food that had Liam confused.

For starters, he was dipping his garlic bread into a bowl of strawberry jelly and Nutella, which he supposed wasn’t the strangest thing he’d ever seen. But then, he’d put watermelon cubes and frozen grapes on top of his vegetables, saying he couldn’t possibly eat his vegetables when they were so hot, so the fruit would not only sweeten the vegetables, but cool them down, as well. OK. Fine. But to top it all off, he’d mixed soy sauce in with his pasta, and was eating everything like it was no big deal.

If he didn’t know how delicious Harry’s cooking was, it would’ve made him lose his appetite entirely.

“Can you pass me another piece of garlic bread?”

Liam turned to the left and saw Niall holding out a hand, completely unaffected by the scene in front of them.

“Uh, yeah.” Liam grabbed a piece from the plate next to him and passed it to his friend.

“Thank you,” Niall said.

“How’s your food, babe?” Harry quietly asked Louis.

“It’s good! Do you want to try any?”

Harry smiled, trying to hold back a laugh. “No thank you; I’m getting a bit full, actually.”

“I hear you. The food is great tonight, H.”

“Thank you.”

“Did you do anything different to it?” Louis asked. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but it tastes like, better tonight.”

Harry shook his head. “Nope. Same recipe. Liam, Niall, do you like the food?”

Niall shook his head enthusiastically. “Love it,” he answered with a mouth full of pasta.

“Yeah, it’s good,” Liam said.

Harry eyed up Liam’s plate and smirked. “You sure, Li? You’ve barely eaten anything.”

“I’m just pacing myself.”

Niall looked over. “If you don’t eat it, I will. It’s great.”

“Back off, Niall.”

Liam took a few bites of his food, watching Louis shovel his own down the whole time.

Harry chuckled. “This is every night,” he told Liam, but said as if he was addressing the whole table.

Liam just shook his head.

“What’s every night?” Louis asked confusedly.

“Us having a great meal,” Harry lied easily.

“Oh. Got that right. You know what this could use? More Parmesan!”

“Now we’re talking!” Liam agreed.

“Right? Babe, can you get me some?”

“Sure.” Harry got up from the table and went to the table, grabbing the green container of Parmesan cheese.

“Here, baby.”

“Thank you,” Louis said. He popped the lid on it, but instead of putting it on his pasta, Liam watched in horror as he shook cheese out over his watermelon/grape/vegetables combination. Then he used his fork to mix it all in. When he was satisfied, he took a large bite.

“Mmm, that’s much better,” he said.

Liam looked next to him to look at Niall, who watched Louis eat for a second before shrugging a shoulder and returning to his own food. Then he looked at Harry, who absolutely loved this.

After trying – and failing – to contain it, Harry snorted at Liam’s face and started laughing. When Louis asked him what was so funny, he didn’t have an answer.

\---

“Do we want like, a classic name?” Harry wondered from his spot on the couch. He and Louis each had a baby name book and were closely looking through them.

“Like what?”

“Like Elizabeth? Or Catherine?”

“I don’t know,” Louis said. “I mean, my sisters all have traditional first or middle names. Maybe we could go a bit different.”

“Isabella?”

“Too  _Twilight_.”

“So I guess Rosalie and Esme are out, too.”

Louis rolled his eyes. “Definitely.” He shifted around on the loveseat where he sat, trying to find a comfortable spot.

“You OK over there?” Harry asked.

“Yeah, it’s just getting harder to sit still.”

“I’m sorry, babe.”

“It’s OK.”

“Um, what about, like, Brooklyn? Or Averie?”

“Averie Tomlinson-Styles?” Louis thought it over. “Yeah, it has a nice ring to it. What about a middle name, though?”

“Shit, you’re right.”

Louis shushed him. “Don’t swear in front of her!”

Harry rolled his eyes.

“Rude.” Louis turned the page again. The problem was that Louis already knew what he wanted the baby’s middle name to be. He just hadn’t told Harry that yet. It was a surprise, meant to go along with the special painting he ordered for the nursery that should be arriving next month. So he was secretly trying to find a first name that went well with it, but it was tough, especially without Harry’s input.

“Gabriella?” Harry suggested. “Or, do we want something cooler? Like Harper?”

Louis scrunched up his name. “No.”

“Oooh, October!”

“What? Be serious!”

“I am! Well, November is in here, but that’s the month she’ll be born, so I don’t want to do that.”

“Yeah, that’s what’s wrong with naming our baby November.”

“I don’t know! There’s so many names!” Harry whined. “This is impossible.”

“People come up with baby names every day. If they can do it, so can we.”

Harry groaned.

“Keep looking.”

Harry looked through the pages, trying to find something. “Greyson? Easton?”

“Isn’t that a Palin?” Louis asked.

“Oh, shit. Yeah, you’re right. Never mind. OK, here we go. How about a gender-neutral name? Hayden? Morgan? Riley?”

“No.”

“Why do I have a feeling you have an idea of a name and you’re just not telling me?” Harry accused.

“I don’t know. Why do you think that?”

“Because you keep shooting down everything I say, but you’re not giving me any suggestions, either.”

“Maybe because I’m thinking about how each name sounds with our last names before blurting one out,” Louis shot back. “Instead of just saying every name I read. Did you ever think of that?”

“That’s not what you’re doing. You’re just as clueless about names as I am.”

“Am not.”

“Are, too.”

“Am not!”

“Are, too!”

“Fine!” Louis yelled. “How about this? Amelia! Amelia Rose Tomlinson-Styles!”

Harry’s jaw dropped.

Louis just raised an eyebrow.

Harry cleared his throat. “That’s… That’s really pretty, Lou.”

“Thanks. I mean, we don’t have to use it if you don’t want to.”

“Of course I want to use it.”

“You just want to be done looking for names,” Louis said.

“That, too.”

Louis laughed.

“But I’m serious. I love it.”

“OK. Amelia it is.”

“Should we start getting it embroidered on blankets and stuff?”

“No!”

Harry jumped back slightly, surprised by Louis’ outburst.

“I mean, not yet,” Louis said. “Let’s get the rest of the nursery planned first. Then we can do all of that.”

“OK. That sounds good.”

Harry tossed his baby book to the coffee table and leaned back into the sofa. “Glad that’s over.”

“Yeah, me, too.”

Louis put his baby book on the coffee table, as well, not planning on telling Harry the real reason he didn’t want to get Amelia’s name embroidered on anything. Rose wasn’t the middle name he had in mind, but it did start with the letter R.

 

**September 2017**

 

“Harry, what is this?” Louis yelled as he walked – waddled probably would’ve been more accurate – downstairs, clutching a piece of paper in his hand.

When he reached the bottom of the steps, he put a hand on his back to steady himself. He wasn’t used to walking that fast anymore.

“Kitchen!”

Louis sighed and followed Harry’s voice to the other room, finding him at the counter, getting dinner ready.

“What’s this?” Louis held it up to Harry’s face so he could read the receipt.

“Oh, I bought the crib.”

“You bought a [crib](https://s7d2.scene7.com/is/image/BedBathandBeyond/13057083332621m?hei=2000&wid=2000&qlt=50,1) that costs eight hundred dollars.”

“Yeah. Are you mad because you didn’t see it first? Because I promise I showed you before I ordered it.”

“I remember you showing me this crib, but I never saw the price tag.”

“Oh. So why are you mad?” Harry wondered.

“Because it’s eight hundred dollars!”

“OK. So? You like it, don’t you?”

“Of course I like it!” Louis yelled.

“So what’s the problem?”

“We can’t afford an eight hundred dollar crib, Harry! What are you thinking?”

Harry fixed Louis with a blank stare and tilted his head. “Really?”

Louis paused, remembering who he was talking to. “Oh, right.”

“Yeah. Right. Babe, relax. I know we don’t really talk much about the whole money thing, but I promise it’s OK. If it makes you feel better, it’s one of those convertible ones, so she’ll have it for like, ever. And when they deliver it, they’ll assemble it for us, too.”

“I just hate spending your money on stuff like this.”

Harry snorted and pulled Louis into a hug. “Stuff like this? You mean  _our baby_? And it’s not exactly my money anymore, is it? It’s  _our_ money.”

“It’s not, though. Not really. We’re not married.”

“Yet.”

Louis stilled and looked up at Harry. It hadn’t been the first time marriage had been brought up before, but this was the most serious tone in which Louis had ever heard Harry mention the subject.

“You know I want to be with you forever, right?” Harry asked.

Louis nodded.

“Good. Just give me some more time, OK?”

Louis smiled softly. “OK.”

“OK. Now, just don’t freak out on my mom when you find out how much she spent on the changing table.”

“What?” Louis yelled, taking a step back and slapping Harry on the arm. “Harry!”

Harry, however, just laughed. “I’m kidding! As if she would ever tell you, anyway.”

Louis groaned and walked away.

“Love you!”

“Yeah, yeah.”

\---

When Harry walked into their bedroom a week later, the last thing he expected to see was Louis still in bed.

“Baby, what are you doing? Did you forget the baby shower is today?”

Louis pouted. “No.”

“So why are you still in bed? Our moms will be here in an hour and everyone else will start arriving soon after that.”

“I’m not going,” Louis said.

“Huh?”

“I’m not going.”

“You’re not going to your own baby shower?”

“No.”

Harry sighed. He walked over to the bed and sat down next to Louis, trying to approach the subject as carefully as he could.

“Louis, why don’t you want to go?”

“I have nothing to wear.”

“Of course you do.”

“No, I don’t.”

“What about that button-up we bought last week?”

Louis’ bottom lip started shaking and tears began lining his eyes.

“Louis, what’s the matter?” Harry asked worriedly.

“It doesn’t fit!”

“What?”

“It doesn’t fit! In the last week I’ve gotten so big that I couldn’t even button up more than three buttons. I looked awful, Harry.”

“Louis, you’re seven months pregnant. You do not look awful.”

“Yes, I do!” Louis insisted. “I can’t wear that shirt.”

“OK, so don’t wear it, then. Just wear a T-shirt.”

“No! I don’t want to look like a bum!”

“If you wear it with jeans, you’ll look great,” Harry assured. “Perfect, even.”

“I don’t want to wear jeans. They’re too uncomfortable to sit around in all day.”

“So don’t.”

“But what will I wear, then? All that’s left are my sweatpants and pajamas.”

“Go in your pajamas, then.”

Louis shook his head and wiped his eyes. “I can’t wear my pajamas to my baby shower, Harry. Everyone else is going to look all nice, and I show up in plaid flannel pants and a T-shirt? Please. How awful will that look?”

“Who cares?” Harry asked gently. “Seriously, who cares? We’re all here to celebrate you and our baby. No one will care what you wear.”

Louis sniffled.

“I want you to be comfortable. That’s all any of us care about.”

“But I can’t stand next to you in a pair of sweatpants, Harry,” Louis said quietly. “Not when you look like that.”

Harry looked down at his outfit, a print button-up shirt with the sleeves folded up, black skinny jeans and black boots.

He looked at Louis’ sad face and made a decision right then. He got up from the bed and went to his walk-in closet.

“Harry, what are you doing?” Louis called after him. He could hear Harry opening drawers and shuffling around in the smaller room, but couldn’t see him from the bed.

A few minutes later, Harry emerged in an entirely new outfit. He was wearing a pair of black joggers with a green Smith University T-shirt and a pair of fuzzy blue winter socks with yellow ducks on them.

Louis started laughing, so hard that he had a new set of tears streaming down his face. “Baby, you look ridiculous,” he eventually said.

“But you still love me, right?”

“Of course I do.”

“So will this get you to wear what you want to the shower today?”

Louis smiled at Harry.

“I just want you to be comfortable,” Harry said.

“OK.”

“Good.”

“But what about our guests? I know my mom got a new dress for this.”

“I’ll tell them it’s a pajama party and they’ll just have to deal.”

“I really don’t deserve you,” Louis said, feeling like he was making a confession.

“You’ve got that backwards, sweetheart. Now get up and get dressed. I’ll go tell everyone about the change in plans.”

He knelt on the bed and pecked Louis on the lips.

“I love you,” Louis told him.

“I love you, too. Now let’s get a move on.”

\---

Within a few hours, the pajama party/baby shower was in full swing. Everyone had been excited to come to the house in their comfiest clothes, despite Louis’ worries.

Right now, though, Louis was keeping a lookout by the front door of the house for Harry as his mom and two of his sisters, Lottie and Fizzy, tried to hurry up and sneak Louis’ surprise addition for the nursery inside the house.

“Go, go, go,” Louis hissed.

Fizzy came in first and rushed up the stairs to make sure nobody else was up there. Lottie and Jay came in next, carrying the wrapped painting in their hands.

With one more look around, Louis followed them up the steps.

“Which way?” Jay asked.

“This way.”

Louis made his way down the hallway as fast as he could to one of the empty bedrooms. It was the one farthest away from his and Harry’s room, so he hoped Harry wouldn’t find it.

“Let’s put it in here,” Louis said once they were in the room.

“Is there like, a closet or something where we can hide it?” Fizzy asked. “I don’t want to just leave it out in the open.”

“I don’t hide things in closets anymore,” Louis told her.

Jay’s eyes narrowed. “Is that a gay joke?”

“Being gay isn’t a joke, mom.”

“If you weren’t pregnant…”

“How about in there?” Lottie asked while Louis laughed, tilting her head toward a white door in the room. “Is that a bathroom?”

“Yeah, this room has a bathroom. We can put it in there. Maybe in the linen closet.”

Jay and Lottie nodded and put it where Louis suggested.

“And you’re sure he won’t look in there?” Jay asked when she walked out. Lottie closed the door behind them.

“I’m positive,” Louis answered. “We don’t use these rooms yet.”

“Yet?”

“Yet. We plan on turning one or two of them into guest rooms. Then we’ll still have the nursery plus an extra room.”

“Isn’t it weird having all of this extra space?” Fizzy asked as she walked over to one of the room’s windows. “Like, you could fit like, five of our house into this one house.”

“Yeah,” Louis admitted. “I mean, I was fine with staying at Harry’s townhouse, just because that’s more my speed, you know? I think it goes without saying that I never thought I’d be living in a house this size that my boyfriend bought with his own money.”

“But you’re happy, right?” Lottie wondered.

“Of course. I didn’t mean any of that in a bad way. This was all definitely a wonderful surprise. I mean, I’m having a baby with the love of my life. Like, Harry’s…  _everything_.” He placed one hand on top of his stomach, feeling the spot where his little girl had just been kicking a few seconds ago. “And then once the baby’s here, then we’ll really have everything. And I’m only 22. Like, it’s crazy to think of how life could get any better.”

Jay smiled at him. “Life does sound pretty great for you, baby.”

“It is. I’m unbelievably happy.” He paused. “And sometimes I really just can’t wrap my head around the fact that out of everybody, Harry chose me to spend his life with.”

A knock captured all of their attention.

“Hey,” Harry said quietly, standing in the open door to the room. “Sorry to interrupt, but my mom wanted to know where you were. She wanted to open presents.”

“Oh, yay, presents,” Lottie cheered. “Where are we opening them? The living room?”

Harry nodded. “Yeah, so if you want to get a good seat, you should probably head down now to beat the crowd of, well, your other siblings.”

Jay laughed. “Yeah, it  _is_ mostly my brood down there, isn’t it?”

“Sort of,” Harry agreed.

“Come on, then, girls. Let’s get down there.”

Jay brought Lottie and Fizzy out of the room with her, making sure to leave Harry and Louis alone.

“Once again, you’re getting things backwards, baby,” Harry said, walking over to the center of the room, where Louis was standing. He pulled his boyfriend into a warm hug, sighing when Louis’ arms wrapped around his back.

“That’s definitely not true,” Louis muttered against Harry’s chest. “You could’ve had anyone.”

“I could’ve had a lot of things, but that wasn’t exactly working out well for me in life, was it?” Harry pulled back just enough to look down at Louis. “Even with all of the money and the fancy clothes and big parties and everything that I could’ve ever bought myself, you were the best thing to ever happen to me. Don’t ever forget that.”

Louis smiled up at Harry before puckering up his lips.

Harry didn’t hesitate to duck his head down and catch Louis lips with his own, giving him a long, sweet kiss.

After they parted, they stood there for just another moment, savoring their time together.

“We should get downstairs,” Harry finally whispered, “before they come looking for us.”

“Probably.”

Harry took a step back, but held out his hand, which Louis happily took.

“What were you doing up here anyway?” Harry wondered as they exited the room.

“Just showing them the house,” Louis answered, which wasn’t a complete lie.

“Showing them an empty room? That must’ve been exciting.”

“Well, there’s a great view of the yard from that room.”

“Oh. OK. If you say so.”

“I say so. Now let’s go open some presents.”

“Yes!” Harry cheered. “I checked the registry online yesterday and saw that someone bought that ‘Welcome to My Crib’ sign. I can’t wait.”

Louis rolled his eyes fondly. “Great, babe. I’m so excited.”

\---

“Can I open my eyes yet?” Louis asked. Harry currently had his hands over his eyes, keeping them shut, as he guided Louis into the now finished nursery.

Louis had spent the last few days at his mom’s house so that he wouldn’t have to be around all of the wet paint. The fumes wouldn’t be good for the baby.

“Almost,” Harry told him. “Just a few more steps.”

“OK.”

Louis could tell when they were actually in the room. The scent of paint hit him like a ton of bricks.

“Oh, wow, you definitely painted. The smell is strong.”

“No, it’s not,” Harry said. “That’s just your pregnancy-heightened sense of smell coming through.”

“As long as it looks nice, it doesn’t matter. We still have seven more weeks before the baby’s in here.”

“Exactly. OK. And, open your eyes.”

Louis felt Harry move his hands away, so he slowly blinked his eyes open. When he could focus, he gasped.

The room looked incredible. The walls were painted just the right shade of rose red that they’d agreed on, and Harry had actually managed to get the white paneling installed, too. The picture frame-like border was painted on the wall, giving them the perfect space to hang photographs once the baby was born.

The crib had been assembled and placed under the border and the changing table that Anne had bought them was across from it on the opposite wall. There were off-white curtains hanging on the windows and under the windows were white butterflies that had been painted on. The hardwood floor had been refinished in a lighter shade, but a large white and tan area rug covered most of it for now, while the baby was still little. There was a light wooden rocking chair with cream-colored padding in the corner near the changing table, complete with an ottoman.

“It’s perfect,” Louis finally said. “Harry, it’s so beautiful.”

“You like it?”

Louis turned around, wanting to roll his eyes at Harry. “Of course I do! You worked so hard on it.”

“I mean, I had a lot of help. I hired someone to install the paneling, because I just didn’t want to mess that up. And turns out, I’m really bad at painting, but you know who’s not? Niall. He was surprisingly great at it. And Perrie did those butterflies. And Liam got the carpet just right so that it would be even in the room. My mom hung the curtains and Gemma stocked up the changing table with onesies and diapers and stuff, so, I didn’t really do that much.”

Louis listened to Harry with a smile on his face.

“I love you,” he said when Harry finally finished rambling.

“I love you, too.”

Louis leaned up and pecked Harry quickly on the lips. “And I have a surprise for you.”

“For me?”

“Yeah. Well, for the nursery, but I didn’t tell you about it yet, because, well, just hang on.”

Louis turned and left the room, knowing Harry was very confused, and loving that fact. He waddled down the hallway to the room farthest away and into the bathroom, where his mom and sister had hidden the painting.

He pulled it out of the linen closet, and carried it slowly back to the nursery, not wanting to drop it.

“OK,” he announced. “Open it.”

“What is it?” Harry asked, taking it in his hands.

“Just open it.”

Harry knelt down and started to tear away the wrapping paper. When he had all of the paper off, he flipped the painting over and… was silent.

“It’s a [robin](https://images.fineartamerica.com/images/artworkimages/mediumlarge/1/robin-in-the-snow-debbie-anderson.jpg),” Louis said when he didn’t say anything for a while. “I, um, ordered it for us to hang in here, because I wanted a way to honor your stepdad. And, I know how close you were to him, and even though I never met him, I know he was a great man, just based on how you and Anne and Gemma talk about him.”

Harry looked up at Louis with tears in his eyes. “Louis…”

“I hope I didn’t overstep.”

“Of course you didn’t!” Harry stood up and pulled Louis into a tight hug. “Baby, you could never overstep. I love it. Is this why you wanted a red theme for the nursery?”

“Yeah. I thought of it a while ago, and it just stuck with me. Once you liked the idea of a red nursery, I knew I had to order a painting to go in here.”

“I love it. Thank you so much.”

“And there’s one more thing,” Louis said.

“What else could there possibly be? This is already so incredible.”

“I want Amelia’s middle name to be Robin,” Louis rushed out.

If he’d thought Harry was shocked before, it was nothing compared to his face now.

He stared right at Louis. “What?”

“Yeah. When we were talking about baby names a while ago, and you asked if I already had a name picked out and that’s why I wasn’t giving any suggestions? Well, you were sort of right. I knew I wanted Robin to be the middle name ever since we found out I was pregnant. It was just a matter of finding something that flowed right with it. And nothing was working, until I read Amelia, and just knew it worked. I’m just happy that you liked Amelia, too, because the options were sort of limited.”

Harry chuckled, his eyes still not leaving Louis’. “You’re incredible, you know that?”

“Sort of. You tell me that a lot.”

Harry laughed. “I do. Because it’s all true. I can’t believe you did all of this for me.”

“Well, you do so much for me. I have to do what I can.”

Harry wrapped an arm around Louis’ shoulders. He looked at the picture again.

“Amelia Robin Tomlinson-Styles,” he said, saying the full name for the first time. “It’s perfect.”

“Just like her daddy,” Louis told him. He placed a hand on top of his stomach and rubbed small circles into it.

“Just like her papa,” Harry replied.

“There you go again, being all cheesy.”

“You started it.”

“Yeah, I guess I did this time.”

Harry leaned in to kiss Louis softly on the lips. As Louis kissed him back, all he could think about was how lucky he was. He had a loving boyfriend, a baby girl on the way and a house that he could have only ever dreamed about.

At this point in his life, just a year and a half ago, everything he had was all just that – a dream.


	4. Chapter 4

**January 2016**

 

Everyone around Louis was cheering and hugging. The ball had just dropped on television. It was officially midnight, which meant it was now January 1, 2016.

Louis took another sip of his champagne and shook his noisemaker again, happy to ring in the new year. He was at his mom’s house, surrounded by all of his family members. The baby twins had somehow managed to stay asleep upstairs through the rest of the family’s celebration.

Lottie and Fizzy were taking selfies with their phones while his mom and stepdad, Dan, hugged again. Daisy and Phoebe, who had looked about ready to pass out just fifteen minutes ago, were now trying to decide which one of them would be brave enough to ask Jay if they could have a sip of her champagne.

Louis took out his phone, planning on sending a ‘Happy New Year’ text to Harry, but stopped when he realized his phone was actually ringing. It was a FaceTime call from the devil himself, and Louis accepted it as he walked out of the front door.

“Happy New Year!” Harry yelled the second the call connected.

Louis grinned. “Happy New Year, Harry.”

“Thank you. Did you watch the ball drop?”

“I did, for whatever reason. I don’t know why. It’s not like I don’t know exactly what’s going to happen.”

“For the excitement, Lou,” Harry told him. “Just, the suspense of waiting for the new year to finally be here and the adventure of what’s to come.”

“Same old shit, different year.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I’m plenty of fun,” Louis insisted.

“I don’t know who told you that, but they lied!”

Louis laughed. “I miss you, man.”

“I miss you, too. The people around here aren’t really… like you, if you catch my drift.”

“How was your night?”

“It was fine. My family had a huge party, as usual. It’s pretty much the last place I want to be, but at least I’m with my family, you know?”

Louis nodded. He understood what Harry meant, but it still broke his heart that Harry had to be in a situation that made him uncomfortable.

“I’m sorry,” Louis said.

“Don’t be. I mean, in a couple of weeks, we’ll be back at school and everything will be back to normal. I can be the weird rich kid who loves to read but doesn’t like to party, and you can be the smart, fun, amazing guy who other people just haven’t had the pleasure of becoming friends with yet.”

“That’s not really how you see us when we’re together, is it?” Louis asked. “I hate that you see yourself that way.”

“I call it like I see it.”

“Yeah, well, for the record, I happen to love that you love to read and don’t like big parties. I also love that you can make me laugh and that you could do anything in the world and you decided to become a teacher, of all things.”

“Jeez, Lou. Stop, you’re gonna make me blush.”

“I’ll stop when you stop seeing all of your amazing traits in a negative way.”

Harry looked down. “It might take a while,” he quietly admitted.

“That’s OK. I’m not going anywhere.”

_Because I love you._

It hit Louis like a ton of bricks. He could see the exact moment that he realized it, too, since his face was currently reflected in the top corner of his phone screen. He loved Harry. Like,  _loved_ him.

All of the signs were there. Throughout the last two weeks of break, Harry was usually the first person Louis talked to in the morning and the last one he talked to before he went to bed. Whenever something funny happened, Harry was the first person he told about it. Harry was the person that he’d wanted to talk to tonight at midnight, besides his own family, but that was only because they were in the room with him. Harry was the person he thought about every day, and couldn’t wait to see when he got back to campus. Harry was also the person whose pretty pink lips Louis was staring at that very moment.

“Louis, are you OK?” Harry asked. “You look pale.”

Louis shook his head, getting himself out of his daze. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just thinking.”

“Oh, don’t hurt yourself.”

“Shut up.”

Harry smiled. Louis wanted to poke his dimples a little bit.

“Well if you’re going to be rude, I guess I’ll just hang up, then,” Harry said.

“Go ahead. I’m not hanging up first.”

“Well I’m not hanging up first.”

“You just said you were hanging up!” Louis said.

“Well I changed my mind. You hang up first.”

“No, you hang up first.”

“I  _dare_ you to hang up first!”

“What?”

“Ha!” Harry actually patted himself on the back. “I know. I’m good.”

“Fuck.”

“So, what are you going to do?”

“I guess I’m hanging up first. You play dirty.”

“Sorry, Lou.”

Louis shook his head. “So unfair.”

“I don’t see you hanging up.”

“Fine. Bye.” Louis hit the ‘End’ button before Harry could say anything else, already feeling sad that he wasn’t talking to him anymore.

And that was another thing. Why was he feeling sad about hanging up a phone call? They would probably talk again later and would definitely be seeing each other in just a few weeks.

There was nothing to be sad about.

Right?

\---

Wrong.

Louis got back to campus on the Saturday at the end of January, two days before classes started, and all he wanted to do was see Harry. Niall came back that day, too, so they spent some time catching up, informing each other of different things that had happened over their winter breaks.

Seeing his roommate was great, but that night, his attention was split between Niall and Harry, who had just sent him a ‘just got back’ text.

Immediately, Louis wanted to go over there, and fortunately for him, it seemed that the ‘missing you’ feeling was mutual, because Harry told him to come over tomorrow.  

So, the next morning, Louis parked his car in Harry’s driveway, and, for whatever reason, felt the need to check his appearance in his rearview mirror before he got out. After seeing how good he looked - if he did say so himself - Louis stepped out of the car.

He went up to the garage door and found the pin pad, typing in the code that Harry had texted him an hour ago. He stood back as the door went up and ducked under it, running inside. He pushed the button next to the door to lock up the garage and made his way into the house.

“Harry!” he called out. “Where are you?”

“In here!”

Louis started to follow the voice into the living room, but got distracted by the large box with a big red bow on it sitting in the dining room. It was in the back corner, behind the table and chairs, but the shiny red caught Louis’ attention immediately.

“Hey, what’s that?” Louis asked.

Harry, who was sprawled on the couch, didn’t even have to get up to see what Louis was talking about.

“Oh, um, that’s just a TV my mom sent me.”

“Your mom sent you a sixty-inch flat screen? What for?”

“I don’t know,” Harry answered vaguely.

“OK, um, I know we’re not talking about the whole ‘you being rich’ thing, but like, is this just something that your people do?”

Harry snorted. “My people?”

“Yes. You people with money. You just send each other expensive presents for fun?”

“No.”

“So what’s it for? Is it your birthday or something?”

“Um…” Harry pursed his lips and looked like he was trying to say something.

“Oh, my God! Harry, it’s your birthday?”

“No.”

“When, then?”

“February 1?” Harry answered, the slight inclination at the end of his sentence making it seem more like a question.

“Febru- Harry, that’s next week!”

“Yeah…”

“Why didn’t you tell me? I didn’t do anything for you!”

“Louis, we’ve talked about this.”

“Yeah, but this isn’t just a ‘thank you’ gift, it’s your birthday! I feel awful.”

“Please don’t,” Harry said in a pleading tone. “Please. Seriously. It’s fine. I’m not having a party or anything, so it’s not like you have to buy me a gift. Liam’s probably just taking me to dinner on my actual birthday, and you can join, if you would like to. But I don’t have to do anything for it, nor do I want to.”

“But it’s your birthday…”

“Yeah. And getting to hang with you and Liam would be enough. I promise.”

Louis sighed. “OK.” He sat down on the couch, what small part was left of it thanks to Harry’s stretched-out body taking up most of it.

“You’re pouting,” Harry noticed.

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“I like birthdays.”

Harry sighed.

Louis made sure to make his pout more pronounced, and even threw in a sad gaze to really drive it home.

“If you promise not to make a big thing of it-”

“I promise! Thank you, Harry!”

“Why are you thanking me? You don’t make any sense.”

“Because I know it’s a big deal for you, to celebrate something in a way that would’ve annoyed other people and made them not want to hang out with you anymore. That’s why.”

“Since when are you a therapist?” Harry wondered.

“Since you started tutoring me and my skills at analyzing things improved by like, a million percent.”

“Damn, I really am good at my job, aren’t I?”

“You really are.”

“You’re still a pain.”

“I know. But you like me anyway, don’t you?” Louis smiled and grabbed the remote off the coffee table before turning on the television to find something to watch.

As he flicked through the channels, Harry watched him, seeing how comfortable he was there.

“Yeah,” Harry said softly before looking away to face the television, as well. “Yeah, I do.”

\---

On Saturday, Louis picked Harry up from the townhouse and started driving without telling him where they were going.

“Well, it’s cold today, so I’m guessing we’re not going someplace outdoors,” Harry said, trying to figure out where Louis was taking him.

“You’d be correct.”

“You’re wearing jeans and a sweatshirt, so it’s not a fancy dinner. I like that.”

Louis smiled. “I knew you would.”

“There’s nothing in the backseat, no like, equipment or anything, so I don’t think it’s sports related.”

“It’s not.”

“Are you taking me shopping?” Harry asked. “Because that would be different.”

“Sort of,” Louis admitted. “We might not buy anything.”

“What do you mean? Louis, you’re not taking me to steal something, are you?”

Louis burst out laughing. “Harry, what do you actually think of me?”

“I don’t know, but you said we might not buy anything… Are we doing window shopping, then?”

“Kind of.”

“Where are you taking me?”

“Hang on. Impatient.”

Harry huffed. He tapped his fingers against his thighs and stared out the window. “Are we there yet?”

“Harry!”

“Just asking a question.”

“You’re a pain in the ass,” Louis told him. “I say that with love, though.”

“When you say it so spitefully, how could I do anything but believe you?”

“Shut up. And we’re here.”

Harry sat up straight as they pulled into a lot and Louis found a spot to park his car.  

“Barnes and Noble?” Harry asked skeptically.

“Yup! So, I found this idea online where it’s like, you do a [scavenger hunt](http://www.thedatingdivas.com/the-bookstore-date/), but with books. Like, you and your friend find a favorite children’s book and read it to each other. Or, you find a poem that describes each other. Um, I figured that since we met because of books and stuff that you might like it. But if you don’t, we don’t, um, have to do it. We can-”

“Lou,” Harry cut in. “I love it. It sounds like a lot of fun.”

“Really?”

“Yeah! Let’s go!”

Harry unbuckled his seatbelt and got out of the car. Louis grinned and got out, too.

Once they were inside the store, Harry asked, “OK. So what do we do?”

Louis pulled out his phone, holding it so Harry couldn’t see the screen. “OK, so it’s three steps. First, it says we have to visit the cooking section and find a recipe that you would like to share with your… friend.”

“Oh, that’s easy!”

“For you. Second, you go to the children’s section and find a book that you loved as a kid and share it with your… friend.”

Harry nodded, thinking over his options already. “OK, I have a few ideas.”

“Perfect. And the last step is to find a poem that describes your… friend.”

“I like this. So, I guess you said we might buy things because we might find books in the store that we like?”

“Exactly.”

“Cool. Well let’s go, then.”

Harry started walking toward the cookbooks and almost immediately found one that was mostly about Italian food.

“You’re going for the big guns, aren’t you?” Louis asked.

“I am. Now go away. I’m looking for a good recipe.”

“Rude.” Louis walked down the aisle, browsing the titles. They all looked a little complicated, like the recipes in them required more work than he was used to.

He looked over his shoulder and saw Harry really reading the book he had like he was studying for an exam.

Louis smiled and shook his head, just happy that Harry had liked his idea. He kept walking around, looking at each shelf in hopes that something good would catch his eye.

And then he saw it. Perfect. He picked up the book and started looking through it, examining the pictures and reading the directions very carefully.

“OK, I think I’m ready,” Harry said, walking over a few minutes later.

“Perfect. So am I.” Louis held up his [book](https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/clone-brews-tess-and-mark-szamatulski/1022683242?ean=9781603425391).

“Louis, brewing beer is not cooking.”

“Of course it is.”

“It is not.”

“It is, too,” Louis insisted. “I’m mixing ingredients. That’s cooking.”

“But the end result isn’t anything you can eat.”

“Well duh, you drink beer.”

“We’ve been here for five minutes, and you’re already cheating.”

“Ch- I am not cheating! Hang on!” Louis pulled out his phone and googled the definition of cooking. He read, “‘cooking: to prepare food, a dish, or a meal by combining and heating the ingredients in various ways.’ That’s how you make beer. You put stuff in a pan or whatever and the first step is to boil it. You didn’t know that did you? Yeah, you boil it, and what happens when you boil something?”

“It gets heated up,” Harry said, already tired from Louis’ argument.

“It gets heated up! That’s right. So yes, brewing beer counts as cooking. Now excuse me.”

“You’re getting this on a technicality. I hope you know that.”

“Oh, I know it. And I’m rolling with it. So what did you find?”

Harry shook his head, but opened his book to the recipe he found. “OK, so how do you feel about seafood? Specifically, shrimp?”

“I’m listening…”

“Good. I’m going to tell you about [this](http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/giada-de-laurentiis/penne-with-shrimp-and-herbed-cream-sauce-recipe-1943967) one. It’s penne pasta with shrimp and a cream sauce with wine in it.”

“Ooh, that sounds good.” When Harry showed him the picture of what the meal looked like, Louis’ mouth started watering. “Yup. I want that.”

“I mean, it looks pretty simple. And the prep time is pretty low.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying we could cook this for dinner tonight.”

“Marry me.”

Harry started laughing. “Because I’ll make you pasta?”

Louis nodded. “Yup.”

Harry tapped his chin, like he was pondering the proposal. “I’ll have to think about it.”

“That’s fair.”

“In the meantime, what beer are you  _cooking_ for us?”

“Well, I’m glad you asked!” Louis opened his book to the page he’d been eyeing up. “OK, so this [beer](https://www.homebrewersassociation.org/homebrew-recipe/maplewood-brewing-co-charlatan-american-pale-ale/) has hints of tropical fruit in it.”

“I’m definitely listening…”

“Right? I don’t know about pairings for food and all that, but I think this one sounds really good. It’s a pale ale, so it’s not too heavy, and it’s got mango, passion fruit and grapefruit brewed right in with it, so you’re definitely going to taste it.”

“I love it. Can you make it for us?”

Louis winced. “Uh… I don’t know about that one. Do you know how much work goes into making your own beer?”

“You picked the book!”

“I didn’t know you were going to one-up me and offer to actually make it. I thought this was like, a hypothetical situation.”

“Well, I guess you’re just gonna have to buy the beer tonight to make up for it. I mean, you kind of owe me.”

Louis rolled his eyes. “Fine. We’ll go to the liquor store after we leave here, and then we’ll go to the grocery store and then back to your place to cook. Deal?”

“Deal.” Harry took out his phone and took a picture of the recipe. “OK. So, kids’ books, right?”

“Right. On we go.”

In order to get to the children’s section, they cut through British Literature, and Harry found an old favorite.

“Oh,  _Romeo and Juliet_!” Harry said, picking up a copy of the play off the shelf. “I love this one.”

“That’s stupid.”

“What?”

“ _Romeo and Juliet_ is stupid.”

“Is not! It’s romantic!”

“They were fourteen!” Louis argued. “Like, come on. ‘Oh, Romeo, Romeo, where for art thou, Romeo? I’ll fucking run away from home and marry you right now if you come steal me from this awful life I lead.’”

“OK, the age thing was a little much,” Harry agreed.

“Yeah, just a little.”

“But you have to admit there’s something romantic about the idea of falling in love with someone you shouldn’t, risking everything to be with them and running away from your family who doesn’t understand.”

“Yeah, the  _idea_ of it,” Louis said. Then he thought about it for a second before adding, “OK, I can see why you’d like the idea of giving up your family name to be with someone you love and never having to be what they want you to be. I get that.”

Harry raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything else.

“But come on. They were fourteen. Like, you don’t get married at fourteen. You get pimples at fourteen. You worry about dancing with someone at Homecoming and being too scared to tell someone you like them at fourteen. You don’t get married. Think about it. If kids these days got married at fourteen, they’d be walking down the aisle in UnderArmour sweatshirts and Adidas sliders.”

Harry started laughing loudly, ignoring the annoyed looks he got from the people around them.

“OK, fine, you hate  _Romeo and Juliet_ , but I like it. If they were a few years older, I think you would love it, too.”

“Maybe.”

Harry put the book back and continued walking.

“OK, so any book you loved as a kid,” Louis repeated when they reached the Childrens’ section.

“Got it. I’ll be over here.”

Louis probably shouldn’t have been surprised when Harry started heading toward the  _Berenstain Bears_ books.  

Louis took a look around, not sure where to go first. Right now, he saw a lot of characters he was only sort of familiar with thanks to his youngest siblings. There were a lot of  _Paw Patrol_ ,  _Sofia the First_ and  _Pete the Cat_ , but not a lot that he would’ve read when  _he_  was a kid.

For each familiar book, Louis found three that he’d never seen before. He browsed the section, reading the covers and wondering what the books were about.

Louis figured  _Geronimo Stilton_ was about a mouse going on some kind of adventure, based on the amount of cheese on the spine of each book.  _A-Z Mysteries_ was probably about a group of kids solving mysteries when a major clue started with a different letter of the alphabet. Louis wasn’t too sure about that one.

 _The World According to Humphrey_ looked like it was about a hamster. Louis didn’t know why there were so many books in that series. How interesting could it be to read about a hamster?

When he looked over his shoulder, Harry wasn’t where Louis had left him, so Louis figured he was actually getting a book. He continued on, walking by the picture books for a second to check for another series.

 _Bingo_.

Louis found the  _Goosebumps_ books, all with new covers, along the back wall of the section. He searched for one that he’d read a thousand times, but when he saw that they didn’t have it, he settled for the sequel. Once he had it in his hands, he went to find Harry.

Louis found him by the Dr. Seuss books. “Did you find one?” he called over.

Harry turned around, holding a  _very_ familiar book in his hands. “Definitely.”

“ _How the Grinch Stole Christmas._ Really, Harry?”

“Oh now you’re gonna tell me this book is stupid, too.”

“I mean…”

“What’s wrong with  _The Grinch_?” Harry wanted to know.

“Well first off, what even  _is_ he? Like, what kind of animal? Or creature or whatever. For that matter, what even are the Whos? Like, are they people with some kind of genetic change? And how did he get to all of those houses and steal all of those presents and get them up that cliff of his? How?”

“How does Santa go to all of the houses in the world in a single night? And how does he carry all of the presents in one little cart that’s pulled by reindeer?”

“Oh, God,” Louis said. “I don’t have to be the one to tell you Santa isn’t real, do I?”

Harry laughed. “Of course not. But it’s a fiction story. You’re thinking way too much into it.”

“I guess.”

“Well, what did you pick?”

Louis held up his book.

“ _The Haunted Mask 2?_ ” Harry snorted. “And you were talking about my book being unrealistic.”

“What? It’s a classic.”

“Yeah, so classic that they made a sequel.”

Louis pouted. “I couldn’t find the first one.”

“Yeah, but how persuasive is this mask if it can get haunted twice? How does that happen?”

“That’s not even what the book is about. It’s the same mask that gets on someone’s face and the longer it’s on, the stronger it gets. Then it takes over and suddenly, the mask is in control and you can’t do anything to stop it.”

“Oh. Sorry, I never read it.”

Louis’ jaw dropped. “What do you mean? Like, you’ve never read  _this_ book? But you’ve read other  _Goosebumps_ books? Right?”

Harry stalled. “Um…”

“You never read  _Goosebumps_ as a kid?”

“No.” Harry shook his head. “My parents wouldn’t let me. They said it was mindless entertainment with no actual value.”

“That’s horrible.”

Harry shrugged. “It’s OK.”

“It is not!” Louis marched back to the  _Goosebumps_ section, now looking for one specific book.

“What are you getting?” Harry asked.

Louis didn’t answer, instead choosing to keep looking for the book. “Ha!” he said a moment later. “Found it.”

Louis pulled a book from the shelf and handed it to Harry. “If you’re going to read any  _Goosebumps_ book, read this one.”

“ _Night of the Living Dummy_?” Harry read. “Why this one?”

“Because everyone knows that one. Might as well start with a true classic.”

Harry turned the book over and read the synopsis. “So, it’s a ventriloquist dummy that comes to life?”

“Yup! Isn’t it great?”

Harry raised his eyebrows, but didn’t say anything.

“Trust me,” Louis said. “You’ll like it.”

“If you say so.”

“I do. Now let’s read these books we actually picked for this challenge.”

They found a sitting area with small wooden chairs that were not comfortable at all to sit in, but shared their books with each other. Harry read his entire book, but Louis only read the first few chapters of his, saying that if Harry wanted to read the rest, he could probably find his original copy somewhere in his mom’s attic.

“And now the last part,” Louis said once they put their respective books away. Harry was still holding the  _Dummy_ book, though. “Poems.”

Harry groaned. “I suck at poetry.”

“So do I. That’s why this one will be fun.”

They walked over to the poetry books and started to look. Louis looked at the covers of the ones that looked like they might be on the romantic side, wondering if it might be too much to give Harry a sentimental poem. But when he checked to see what Harry was doing, he found that he didn’t have to worry.

“Is that a Shel Silverstein book?” he asked.

Harry looked up from what he was reading. “What? Oh, yeah.”

“You’re giving me a Shel Silverstein poem?  _Where the Sidewalk Ends_? Seriously?”

“Well… yeah. I told you I suck at this.”

Louis walked over to see what Harry was looking at.

“In the Land of Happy?” Louis read. “Sounds like fun.”

Harry shrugged. “I was just browsing. I think it describes you, though.”

Louis read the poem out loud.

_Have you been to the Land of Happy._

_Where everyone’s happy all day._

_Where they joke and they sing_

_Of the happiest things._  

_And everything’s jolly and gay?_

Louis snorted. “Oh, is that why you picked this for me?”

Harry laughed. “Shut up and finish reading it.”

“Fine.”

_There’s no one unhappy in Happy._

_There’s laughter and smiles galore._

_I have been to The Land of Happy-_

_What a bore!_

“Well this makes me sound like a real treat,” Louis said.

“No, not like that! Just like, you see through the masks that people put on. You know that it’s not possible to be happy every single moment of your life, and you’re not impressed when people act like something they’re not. That’s you.”

Louis thought it over. “Oh. OK, so there’s some symbolism there.”

“Yeah, surprisingly enough.”

“Interesting. Let me find one.”

Harry passed the book over and Louis started to look through the pages. After a few minutes, he paused.  

“Oh, this one’s perfect for you,” Louis said. He cleared his throat and read, ‘I have a friend who is a giant-’”

“OK, that’s enough.” Harry snatched the book from him and started flicking through more pages as Louis laughed. “So we’re done with the symbolism then.”

They went back and forth for a while, finding poems to read to each other that slowly got more and more ridiculous.

It took until the poem of a dog with two tails and no head for Louis to say it was enough.

“OK. Are we ready to eat?” he asked.

“Yes; I’m starving. Let me just go pay for this.”

Harry held up his  _Goosebumps_ book and started to walk toward the front of the store. As they walked, Louis snatched the book from his hand.

“Louis!”

“Harry, I promised I wouldn’t do anything big for your birthday. And did I?”

“No…”

“So I kept my promise. This means that I get to buy you a five-dollar book. I promise I don’t want anything from you in return, OK? Well, except for some pasta for dinner. But I’m buying the beer, so it balances out, don’t you think?”

Harry thought about it. “I guess.”

“Good. So, I’ll go buy this, then we can get started on dinner. OK?”

Harry smiled. “Sounds good.”

\---

A little more than an hour later, after going to the grocery and liquor stores, Harry and Louis were back at Harry’s house getting dinner ready. Since it was the end of January, finding a tropical-flavored beer was a little tough, so Harry and Louis just settled for rum.

“Louis, you don’t need that much!” Harry insisted as he watched Louis pour more rum into the blender.

“Says who?”

“Says me! It’s a piña colada, you know. Is there any pineapple juice in there at all?”

“Of course!” Louis promised over the sound of the blender whipping up more drinks. When he was done, he added, “Somewhere.”

“Louis…”

“I’m kidding. Just watch the stove; don’t burn our dinner.”

“I’m almost done,” Harry told him. “I just have to combine everything and mix it up, then it’ll be ready.”

“Oh. That was fast.”

“Yeah, well time flies when you drink two piña coladas and try to get the chef drunk, too.”

“I’m not drunk.”

“Yet.”

“And if I was?” Louis challenged. “What would you do?”

“Probably film you doing stupid shit.”

“That’s no different than any other day.”

Harry snorted. “Yeah, you have a point there.”

“Hey!”

“You said it!”

“Yeah, but you weren’t supposed to agree!”

Harry shook his head. “It’s challenging knowing you sometimes.”

“At least it’s not all the time.”

“Yeah. Food’s ready.”

Louis put his glass down and went to get plates from one of the overhead cabinets. He grabbed two and put them on the counter before getting silverware out for them, as well.

“Do you want to eat at the table or in front of the TV?” Louis asked. He looked up to see Harry staring at him with a blank expression. “Oh, right. Silly me. In front of the TV it is.”

After Harry put pasta on both plates, Louis took them out to the living room and put them on the coffee table. Harry followed him with two glasses now completely full with piña coladas.

Louis picked up the remote and asked, “Do you want to watch a movie?”

“We can,” Harry said.

Louis pulled up Harry’s Netflix account and started browsing through different categories. “Are you in the mood for anything in particular?”

“Um… I don’t know. Nothing scary.”

“I can work with that.”

Harry took a bite of his pasta, which he found that he actually really liked, and thought about any movies he might want to watch.

“You watch a lot of rom-coms, I see,” Louis teased, seeing that most of the suggested categories had to do with romance.

“Yeah. So?”

Louis just shrugged. “Nothing. Just, your Netflix looks the same as mine.”

“Maybe we’re Netflix soulmates, then.”

“I don’t think that’s a thing, Harry.”

“We can make it a thing if we want it to be a thing.”

“This is getting weird. Pick a movie.”

Harry sighed. “I don’t know… Oh! You know what I was thinking about the other day?”

“Giving me a straight answer instead of making me figure out what movie you want to watch?”

“You’re no fun.”

“Just tell me what movie to put on!”

“Fine!” Harry yelled. “ _The Breakfast Club_! Are you happy now?”

“Will you get mad if I say ‘yes’?”

“Maybe a little annoyed.”

“OK, then.”

Louis brought up the movie and started it. Then he started to really eat, now that his major decision for the night had been made.

As the movie began, Louis let his mind wander. This whole night had felt oddly domestic, not even counting the spouse scavenger hunt he had taken an unknowing Harry on.

They had cooked dinner together – Louis only technically – and were now eating it in front of the TV and watching a movie. It felt like a regular romance to Louis, except for the fact that Harry didn’t know Louis liked him. Louis looked down at his plate and wondered how – no,  _if_ – he should tell him.

Louis didn’t want Harry to think that he was like his other ‘friends,’ that he was only interested in Harry for the money or for what Harry could do for him. Because honestly, it was the exact opposite. Louis was happiest with Harry on nights like this, when they just spent time together. Harry didn’t have to buy him anything and Louis usually didn’t let him.

He was pretty sure, though, that he’d made his stance clear to Harry, that he actually liked Harry for  _Harry_. It was just the little bit of uncertainty that was holding Louis back from saying anything. He didn’t want Harry to cut him out of his life and pretend like he never existed, like his old friends.

“You OK?” Harry asked, cutting into his thoughts.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just thinking about which character I’m the most like.”

“Oh. I think I used to be Claire, but now I’m more Allison.”

“How are you Allison?” Louis wanted to know.

Harry shrugged. “Just like, the basic way. I’m quiet, I don’t really talk to anyone here and on the outside, people probably think I’m antisocial and don’t want to talk to anybody because I hate them. I mean, they’re not totally off the mark, but still…”

“Yeah, but Allison was more of an outcast. You’re definitely not an outcast.”

Harry snorted. “Louis, I have two friends: you and Liam. Niall’s cool, but I wouldn’t consider him a friend yet. I actually do sort of avoid people, just because there aren’t many people these days that I feel like being bothered with. Plus, Allison was ‘the basket case,’ and what’s more basket case-like than throwing a fit on the quad in the middle of the day so everyone can see and hear you? Probably nothing.”

“See, there you go again, seeing everything about yourself as a negative.”

“How can you possibly make that into a positive, Louis? How?”

Louis took a deep breath. “Well, you’re not a basket case. You just reached your breaking point with people who were no good for you. You stopped holding in your real feelings and let them know exactly what you thought of them. You’re not antisocial – even though there’s nothing wrong with that – you just know who you really want to spend time with. You don’t want to waste time hanging out with people who you don’t really care about. And so what if you only consider a few people here a friend? It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. Again, you know who you want to be around. You know who your true friends are. But, you also have all of the people who you tutor, who probably love and respect you, and you have your family, who I know love you. And most importantly, you have me, who’s not going anywhere, and really just wants you to be happy.”

By the time Louis finished his speech, Harry was just staring at him with a fond expression, his lips slightly parted like he was preparing to say something.

Louis stared right back, hoping that his eyes would relay how much truth was behind that last sentence. He cleared his throat. “Um, but that’s just what I think.”

Harry put his plate down on the table and moved toward Louis, wrapping his arms around and pulling him into a tight hug.

Louis just smiled. “Was it something I said?” He heard Harry giggling into the crook of his neck.

“Thank you,” Harry said when he pulled back. “You always know how to build me up.”

“Someone has to. Might as well be me.”

Louis could feel Harry grinning even though he couldn’t completely see him. He pulled back and saw that he was correct: Harry had a very wide smile stretching across his face.

“I’m totally Brian, by the way.”

“What?” Harry gasped. He picked up his food and took another bite. “You’re not Brian.”

“Maybe not as much now, but in high school, I definitely was. Always had A’s, never messed up or did anything wrong. My parents weren’t as strict, and I never had suicidal thoughts like he did, but yeah… I was, uh, intense with my grades. So it was a bit of a shock to me when I realized I actually needed a tutor.”

“Were you one of those kids who just didn’t want to ask for help?”

“Yeah,” Louis admitted. “I just didn’t want people to know that I actually  _didn’t know something_. Like, there was nothing worse than that for me, than having people see me as second best. I had to be the best; I had to go to a great school and do everything right. I couldn’t afford the great school right away, but at least I’m here now.”

“I’m glad you’re here now,” Harry quietly said.

“Me, too.”

The two of them smiled softly at each other. After a few minutes, Louis cleared his throat and sat up a bit straighter, which also put some space between Harry and Louis, who had been slowly moving toward each other.

“Um, we should probably eat,” Louis said. “Before the food gets cold.”

Harry nodded and turned to his plate. He also took a long sip of his drink.

“Thirsty?”

“Yeah. And this could’ve used more pineapple.”

Louis slapped Harry in the arm as they both laughed. “Shut up and drink it!”

“Gladly.”

\---

An hour later, Harry and Louis were on the right side of tipsy. Louis’ piña coladas definitely had a bit too much rum, and it was showing in both boys.

The two of them were sitting on the couch, giggling about the squeaky noise Harry had just made.

“You sounded like a mouse,” Louis said, laughing loudly.

“Shut up!” Harry whined. “I thought there was a spider on the back of my neck!”

“It was just your hair! Is that what happens when you grow your hair out? It gets long and brushes against your neck and you scream like my baby sister?”

“I thought it was a spider!” Harry insisted.

“It was just your hair, babe.”

“You’re being mean.”

“No, I’m not.”

“Yes, you are.”

Harry pouted, even going so far as to cross his arms in front of him.

But as mad as Harry might have been, all Louis could think about was how cute he looked, with his pink lips jutting out and bright green eyes staring him down. His curly hair was loose around his shoulders, with a few strands falling in front of his face.

Louis really wanted to kiss him.

So he did.

It was nothing but a brief peck, just Louis’ lips pressed up against Harry’s soft ones, but it was enough to warm Louis up like he was sitting on the beach in hundred-degree weather. It was enough to make his heart race so fast he was sure no monitor could track its speed. It was enough to tell Louis that he didn’t really want to kiss anyone else. Ever.

The problem was, when Louis kissed Harry, Harry didn’t kiss him back. When Louis pulled back, Harry looked stunned, and the look in his eyes had Louis thinking that Harry was trying to find a way to let Louis down gently.

“Um…” Louis stalled. “I, uh- Shit.”

Louis stood up and headed for the door, fully intending on grabbing his shoes and getting the fuck out of there.

But he didn’t make it there.

“Louis, stop!”

Louis paused just outside the laundry room, preparing himself for the let down.

Harry was just a few feet from him. “You kissed me.” He said it as an observation, not an angry accusation. Louis supposed he should be happy about that.

“Yeah. I did. I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry?”

“Well, yeah? I mean, you didn’t seem to want it. I got confused, I guess. So I’m sorry that I kissed you when you didn’t want me to. Um, but I’m not sorry I did it, either? I mean, I’m not sorry that you at least know how I feel. About you, I mean. I mean, I’ve sort of been wanting to do that for a few weeks, so I’m glad I did it. So, I guess I’m also sorry that I’m not sorry? That doesn’t make any sense. Shit.”

“You kissed me,” Harry repeated.

“Yeah.”

“And you wanted to? You’re not sorry that you did?”

“No, I’m not sorry.”

“Good.”

Before Louis could ask for clarification, Harry was rushing forward, cupping his cheeks in his hands and connecting their lips together again.

This kiss was much different now that both parties were participating in it. Harry moved his lips against Louis’ in a smooth, slow rhythm, like he was making sure there wasn’t a single second of this that he didn’t forget.

Louis took a step forward and wrapped his arms around Harry’s waist, holding him closer to him. His fingers made his way under the hem of Harry’s T-shirt, and gently stroked the warm skin on Harry’s back. He felt Harry sigh against his mouth before spreading his lips. Louis slid his tongue in, instantly feeling Harry’s tongue against his. He tilted his head as he took another step impossibly closer so that every part of him was touching Harry.

He couldn’t get enough. The longer he kissed Harry, the more he wanted, and now that he knew Harry felt the same way – at least on some level – he knew that he could have it all, everything that Harry would give him.

Eventually they both needed to breathe properly, so after a few more long kisses mixed with a couple of soft pecks, they finally pulled apart.

Louis kept his hands where they were, and trailed his fingers over Harry’s back.

“So…” Louis started.

“Was tonight a date?” Harry whispered.

“Why are you whispering?”

“I don’t know. It feels like it’s gonna be a secret, so it seemed appropriate.”

Louis smiled. “I don’t know. Do you want it to be a date?”

“Maybe.”

“Then it can be a date.”

“OK," Harry said. 

“OK. You’re a cheap date.”

Harry rolled his eyes and took a step back.

“No!” Louis protested, holding on. “Don’t move.”

Harry sighed and pulled Louis closer to him instead. “I guess. But can I take you on a real date? One that we both know about before and while it’s happening?”

“I guess. That seems like things that regular people do.”

“Yeah, but I don’t know if we’re normal people,” Harry said.

“You’ve got a point. But yes, I’d love to go out with you.”

“Good. I’ll figure it out. In the meantime, can we make out some more?”

“Hmm…” Louis said, as if he was thinking it over. “I guess that would be OK.”

When Harry pulled Louis in, bringing their lips back together, they both knew that it was more than OK.

 

**February 2016**

 

“I’ve never been kicked out of a theater before,” Louis admitted as he and Harry got into Harry’s car.

It was the following Saturday, and the two of them had decided to go see a movie as part of their date. The problem was, they had spent so much time making out in the back that Louis not only couldn’t even remember what movie they’d paid to see, but an employee had interrupted them to tell them that they needed to leave immediately.

Oops.

“Yeah, me, either,” Harry said, turning the key in the ignition. “Guess we’ll just go to the bar a little earlier than expected.”

“That’s OK. By the time we get there, it’ll be almost ten. That’s respectable enough.”

The two of them made small talk on the way to the bar, one that was close to Harry’s house, but neither of them had been to before.

Harry soon pulled into the parking lot, having no problem finding a spot to park his car due to the early hour – early by Saturday college town standards, anyway.

They flashed their IDs at the entrance and made their way inside. The crowd inside was decent, but there wasn’t anybody on the dance floor yet.

Since they didn’t want to be the first ones out there, Harry followed Louis to the bar. Louis got the bartender’s attention and asked for two beers and four green tea shots.

“Four?” Harry asked in surprise when the bartender went to get their drinks.

“Yeah. What’s wrong with that?”

“I don’t know. I mean, it seems like a lot. We just got here.”

“That’s the point, Harry. We need to get the night started somehow, don’t we?” Louis asked.

“Yeah. I guess.”

“If it’s a problem, just tell me. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” Louis said sincerely.

“It won’t make me uncomfortable; I promise. You know what? Bring on the shots!”

“That’s the spirit!”

When the bartender came back, Harry gave her the money to cover the cost.

Louis picked up a shot and held it up. “To a successful first date.”

Harry grabbed a shot and clinked it to Louis’ glass. “Cheers.”

They threw back the shot, and after a brief glance, took the second one, as well.

It was going to be a good night.

\---

An hour later found Louis and Harry on the dance floor, now packed with more people. But the two of them didn’t even notice; they were in their own world.

Louis was pressed up against Harry, his back to Harry’s front. Harry had his hands on Louis’ waist, just holding on as Louis’ hips moved slowly against Harry’s crotch in time to the music.

Louis had one hand wrapped up and around the back of Harry’s neck, while the other was running up and down his own torso, feeling himself through the thin material of his T-shirt.

Harry was running his nose up and down the side of Louis’ throat, and the feeling of Harry’s breath on Louis’ skin was sending shivers up Louis’ spine.

“You’re so fucking gorgeous,” Harry said in Louis’ ear before he moved down to kiss the crook of Louis’ neck.

Louis grinned and let his eyes fall shut. God, he felt alive right now. He had a slight buzz going on, Harry was all over him, and, based on what he felt against his ass, he could feel Harry getting hard for him.

Just to tease a little more, Louis rocked his hips back, rubbing his ass right up on Harry. His grin grew when he heard Harry groan at the sudden feeling.

“I need to get you off this dance floor before I do something I’ll get kicked out for,” Harry told him, as if it was something nobody else could see.

“Is that right?” Louis turned around and caught Harry’s lips in an open-mouth kiss. He slipped his tongue in between Harry’s lips, and Harry immediately began sucking on it.

The two of them stood there, making out, still in their own little world. It wasn’t until someone bumped into them, jostling them out of their daze that they pulled apart from each other.

“I need another drink,” Harry said.

Louis agreed. He’d sweated out most of the alcohol he’d had before hitting the dance floor, and that wasn’t OK. He grabbed Harry’s hand and led him off the dance floor.

They shoved their way through the crowd and eventually reached the bar.

“Babe, what do you want?” Louis asked, trying to flag down the bartender. When Harry didn’t answer him, Louis turned around, shocked at what he saw. “Harry, what’s the matter?”

Harry was standing so tensely Louis was afraid he was going to snap. His jaw was clenched, his head was ducked and his shoulders were hunched in, like he was trying to make himself smaller. But it was his eyes that held his attention. They were staring straight down to the floor and already tearing up.

As far as Louis could tell, nothing had happened, but there was something coming. "Baby, what's wrong?" he tried again. 

“Styles!”

Louis turned toward the voice and saw a familiar-looking guy heading toward them. He was a few inches taller than Louis, and looked a bit stronger than him. He had dark hair and eyes, and an evil sneer on his face.

He’d seen this guy around campus before. He didn’t recall his name, but this guy wasn't the kind of guy Louis would ever hang out with.

Then Louis remembered. This was Grant, Harry’s former ‘best friend.’

Louis had his guard up immediately, based on his own gut reaction and also Harry’s tense form. He adjusted his stance so he was between Harry and this new guy as he got closer.

“What are you doing here, Styles?” the guy barked. He was very arrogant, talking like he should just be given everyone’s automatic attention.

Louis could feel Harry shift around behind him, and finally heard a quiet, “Hey, Grant.”

“Can’t hear you, Styles!” Grant mocked. “Why you so silent?”

“I wasn’t- Um, I’m not, uh, silent.”

“Still a loser, I see. Can’t even get a basic sentence out.”

“I’m not a loser.” Harry snuck a quick glance at Louis, hoping Louis somehow was ignoring this. “I can get a sentence out.”

“Why don’t you just leave him alone,” Louis told Grant. It seemed like a suggestion, but Louis’ tone proved otherwise.

“Oh, you got a bodyguard here, Styles?” Grant asked. “Interesting choice. Kind of small, if you ask me.”

“Why don’t you fuck off?” Louis shot back.

“Oh, he’s feisty! Good for you, Styles. That was always your type, wasn’t it?”

“Excuse me?”

“Grant, shut up!” Harry said.

“Oh, I struck a nerve, huh?” Grant sneered.

“You’re  _on_ my nerves, that’s for sure,” Louis told him. “Seriously, fuck off. No one invited you over here to interrupt our night.”

“No, but I saw you and decided to come say ‘hi.’”

“OK, great. Now go back to whatever people have low enough standards to actually be some kind of friends with you.”

“Well you don’t have to be rude.”

Louis scoffed. “You came over here with that intention, though, didn’t you, Grant? Just wanting to bother us somehow?”

“What are you talking about? I’m not bothering you,” Grant said. “I’m just stopping by for a chat with my good friend Harry here. It’s been a while since we’ve seen each other.”

“And whose fault is that?” Harry asked, getting a little louder.

“Yours,” Grant told him simply. “If you hadn’t started acting like a little antisocial bitch, you’d still have people to hang out with.”

“Don’t talk to him like that,” Louis said, taking a step toward Grant. “And he does have people to hang out with. He has me.”

Grant gave Louis a quick once over. Then he scoffed. “People who matter.”

“OK, you know what?” Louis shifted forward quickly, feeling Harry’s hand on his arm to hold him back.

Grant grinned. “You even let people fight for you now, Styles? That’s great.”

“He doesn’t need me to fight his battles for him,” Louis shot at him. “He’s a grown man and can handle himself. It’s you actually that I’m a bit worried about. You really felt the need to come over here and talk to us even though it’s pretty clear that Harry doesn’t want you here. And you know what? I don’t want you here, either.”

Louis started to move forward, getting closer to Grant as he walked. “So I’m not fighting Harry’s battle, but I’m sure as hell fighting mine, because  _you_  came over here and got in  _my_  face. You’re rude, you’re condescending, you’re disrespectful and, quite honestly, you seem like a bit of an asshole. Maybe when you were ‘friends’ with Harry way back when, when he let you mooch off him like the parasite you are, that was OK. But those days are over. Harry doesn’t want to spend time with you or waste his money on someone who isn’t there for him when the times get rough. He’s too good for that. He’s warm and loving and kind and patient and the fact that you abused his wonderful traits because your head was stuck so far up your ass that you couldn’t see what a real friend was, honestly, was your fault. And it’s your loss that you don’t get to be friends with Harry anymore. But you’ll survive. Cockroaches always do. So you can back off now like I’ve already asked, go find your friends or whoever can actually tolerate you and leave us alone. How’s that sound?”

By now, Louis was just inches from Grant and was also aware that they had a small audience, including the bartender that Louis had been trying to find. If Louis had been less angry, he would have felt a little more embarrassed, but honestly, he didn’t care about anything right now. Nothing was more important than getting Harry away from him and making sure Harry felt comfortable again.

Grant took a step back, still eyeing Louis up. He took a look around and, seeing people still watching, said “OK, Peanut, relax.”

“Peanut?” Louis roared.

“Grant, fuck off,” Harry yelled. “Just fuck off, OK? You were never my real friend. You’ve never actually cared about me or what was going on in my life. All you saw was dollar signs. So what do you want right now? Seriously, I’m happy now. My life is great, so much better than any time when you were in it. So just walk away. I don’t need you in my life. I don’t want to see you right now or ever again, honestly. Walk away.”

Grant scoffed. “Or what?”

Louis grabbed a glass of beer from the bar next to him and splashed it in his face.

Harry’s jaw dropped as Grant stood there with beer dripping down his face and onto his T-shirt.

Grant wiped his face, trying to get the beer away from his eyes. “What the fuck? Are you kidding me?”

“No. I’m not kidding, asshole. But I sure as hell am done here. Let’s go, Harry.”

Louis grabbed Harry’s hand and pulled him away from Grant. They walked out of the bar and once their feet hit the sidewalk, Harry started leading them. His hand gripped onto Louis’ more tightly and their speed picked up.

When they got to Harry’s car, Louis wanted to ask if they were OK. Harry hadn’t said anything since they started walking, and even now, as he started the ignition and backed out of his space, he wasn’t saying anything.

Suddenly, Louis didn’t feel so tough. Was Harry mad at Louis for opening his big mouth and sticking up for him? What if Harry wanted to handle it himself and Louis just went and messed it all up?

 _Shit_.

That was probably exactly what happened. And now Harry was going to take him home and break up with him. They weren’t even dating yet and Louis had already messed it all up.

A few minutes later, they pulled into Harry’s driveway and they both got out of the car.

“Harry?” Louis asked, but Harry didn’t say anything. Harry went up to the garage door and pushed his code into the pin pad.

When the door was up, they both went inside. Louis went into the house first and waited as Harry locked the garage and shut the door behind him.

“Harry, I’m sor-”

Louis was cut off as Harry grabbed him behind the neck and pulled him into his chest. Harry roughly brought their lips together and walked them backward until Louis’ back crashed into the wall behind him.

"No one's ever stood up for me like that before," Harry confessed. "You ripped Grant to shreds. Do you know how fucking hot that was?" 

Louis put his hands on Harry’s hips, holding tightly on as Harry connected their lips again and pushed his tongue into Louis’ mouth. Louis let out a whimper when Harry’s tongue found his.

Harry grabbed Louis’ hands and pulled them over Louis’ head, securing them there against the wall with just one of his hands. With his free hand, he trailed down Louis’ torso, his fingers feeling feather-light against him.

Harry continued moving his hand down, down, down until he reached Louis’ waist. Then he slid it around to Louis’ back and slipped a finger down beneath the waistband of his jeans.

“Fuck,” Louis gasped, pulling away. He felt Harry’s finger sliding down his crack toward his hole, and the desire for him to go all the way down made him drop his head back against the wall. Harry took the opportunity to go after Louis’ throat, then. He instantly attached his lips to the side of Louis’ neck, sucking and kissing at the skin there until he found a sweet spot.

“Oh, God,” Louis said as Harry nibbled at the sensitive skin just above his pulse point. He lifted one leg and hitched it around Harry’s waist and rolled his hips forward, looking for some friction on his dick, which was currently straining against the front of his jeans.

“Lou,” Harry moaned as he switched sides of Louis’ neck.

“Harry, come on,” Louis whined. He rolled his hips again, this time meeting Harry’s crotch against his own. He hadn’t noticed Harry lining their hips up, but the pressure against his cock felt good.

The two of them stood there, essentially dry humping as Harry kissed him again, much softer than the situation called for. Louis could already feel his orgasm building up, so he started to move quicker.

And then the pressure was gone.

“No!” Louis cried. “Harry!”

“Not here,” Harry told him. “Upstairs. Let’s go.”

Breathlessly, Louis nodded. Then he started running up the stairs, headed straight for Harry’s bedroom. When he got there, he kicked off his shoes before pulling his shirt off and tossing it toward Harry’s hamper in the corner. It would get washed eventually.

When he turned around, Harry was standing in the doorway, watching him carefully.

“You coming in?” Louis asked. “Or do I have to do all of this myself?” Then he pulled down his jeans and his briefs, as well.

Louis didn’t have enough shame to even blush as Harry’s eyes zoned right in on his cock. Louis wasn’t dumb; he knew he looked damn good, and his hard dick probably looked pretty damn perfect to horny Harry.

Harry took a few steps toward Louis, but Louis held a hand up. “Nope,” he said. “You, too.”

Harry smirked when he realized what Louis meant, so without another word, he undressed, too. His clothes actually made it into the hamper.

Now the two of them stood in front of each other completely naked. Both of them shamelessly looked the other over.

“Are you ready now?” Harry asked, partly serious, partly trying to hide his grin.

Louis just nodded.

Harry slowly walked over to Louis and cupped his face in his hands before pressing their lips together. This kiss was slower, even slower than the last kiss downstairs. Louis put his hands on Harry’s waist so that he could do the guiding this time. He took a few steps back, and, making sure Harry was moving with him, backed up to the bed.

He took his time sitting down so that Harry could follow him, and when Louis was seated, he wrapped his arms around Harry’s neck and pulled him down with him. Their lips stayed connected the whole time.

Harry had one knee on either side of Louis’ body and rested his forearms on either side of Louis’ head to keep him balanced. They kissed for a few more minutes and when Harry pulled back, it was just enough that he could rest his forehead against Louis’.

“What do you want?” Harry asked gently.

“You. All of you.”

Harry didn’t move for a moment, like he was thinking something over. But then he pecked Louis on the lips and moved down the rest of his body.

He kissed and licked all over Louis’ chest, lingering around his nipples. One at a time, he pulled the small buds into his mouth, sucking on them until they got extra puffy.

“Harry,” Louis moaned. “God…”

Louis’ toes curled into the mattress as Harry worked him over. His cock was impossibly hard, and he didn’t know how it could get any harder.

And then Harry was pushing his legs apart and sucking him off. It took everything Louis had not to thrust up into his mouth, but he somehow restrained himself. He did, however, weave his fingers into Harry’s hair and pull. Hard.

Harry groaned, the vibrations from his throat going down Louis’ cock and sending him even more into madness.

“Oh, Harry!” Louis pulled even more as Harry moved his head up and down, getting Louis’ dick completely wet. “Make me come, please.”

At Louis’ words, Harry moved one hand from Louis’ leg and put two fingers near Louis’ mouth. He continued sucking on Louis, and Louis sucked Harry’s fingers into his mouth, getting them slick. He had a pretty good idea what Harry was going to be doing with these fingers.

After a few minutes, Harry pulled his fingers out of Louis’ mouth and brought them down between Louis’ legs. He circled one wet finger around Louis’ hole.

Louis gasped and his mouth fell open. He couldn’t handle this: Harry on his cock and around his hole at the same time. It was… a lot.

When Harry started to push in with his finger, Louis let out a loud moan. “Harry, I’m gonna… Shit, pull off or-”

Louis didn’t get to finish his thought, because suddenly he was coming. Harry was able to pull off a bit, but not all the way, so Louis shot right into Harry’s mouth.

Harry sucked him through it, though, and Louis was gasping for air when he was finished.

“Are you OK?” Harry asked before bringing his body up so he was hovering over Louis.

“Yeah. Fuck, your mouth is incredible.”

Harry grinned. “Thanks.”

Louis laughed. “I wanted to ride you, though.”

“Really?” Harry raised an eyebrow. “I mean, you always can later if you want.”

“No.” Louis shook his head. “Now.”

Taking Harry by surprise, Louis pushed his shoulder, knocking Harry off balance. He fell to the bed next to Louis, and flipped himself onto his back just as Louis was straddling him.

“Where’s your stuff?” Louis asked.

“Top shelf of the dresser.” Harry pointed behind Louis to the bureau next to the bed.

Louis got up and opened the drawer, finding lube and condoms there, just as Harry said. He grabbed a bottle and ripped a condom off the strip before returning to the bed. He dropped the condom onto Harry’s pillow and popped the cap on the lube.

Harry held his hand out for it, but Louis just shook his head.

“Nope. You can just watch for now.”

“Are you kidding?” Harry asked.

Louis grinned and winked. Then he coated three of his fingers in the lube before reaching behind himself. He rubbed at his hole with one finger before circling it, massaging gentle circles to his spot.

He watched Harry as he did it, even biting his lower lip just to gauge Harry’s reaction.

Apparently, it was entirely positive. Harry’s cheeks were flushed and there was a light layer of sweat on his face. His eyes were also glued to Louis’ face for right now. Since he had Harry’s attention, Louis let his eyes flutter shut and he stopped biting his lip. He pushed one finger inside himself and let out a shuddery breath.

“Fuck, Lou,” Harry whispered. He put his hands on Louis’ hips, letting them roam around to Louis’ ass. He gave each cheek a squeeze.

Louis smiled and opened his eyes. “You like my ass, huh?” he asked as he kept moving his finger inside himself.

“I do.”

“Yeah? How much?”

“Can I show you?” Harry asked.

The question sent a jolt right to Louis’ cock. “Maybe.”

Harry lay his head back on the bed and moved his hands down to the mattress beside him. “Come here.”

Louis slowly pulled his finger out of his hole and shuffled up the bed so that he was hovering over Harry’s face.

“Are you sure?” he asked before moving anymore.

Instead of answering, Harry wrapped his hands around Louis’ upper thighs, lifted his head and licked. The tip of his tongue grazed Louis’ hole, but it was enough to convince Louis.

He lowered himself down onto Harry’s waiting tongue and cried out at Harry’s first full lick. It felt incredible, to say the least.

Because Louis had already started fingering himself open, it was easy for Harry to point his tongue and slide it inside of Louis.

And he did.

“Ah, Harry. Oh f- Oh, shit.” With every lick, Louis could feel himself shaking more as he sat on Harry’s face. He reached down and grabbed Harry’s hair again, needing to hold something to feel a little more balanced. But it didn’t help. Louis’ thighs shook around Harry’s head. He tried to lock them up, but they were too wobbly to stay still.

Louis wanted to moan, but he was so overwhelmed from Harry licking him out that all that came out was a small squeak.

When Harry’s tongue wasn’t sliding in and out of Louis’ hole, it was moving all around it, in both short, kitten licks and long, thorough ones. The uncertainty of what was coming next – no pun intended – had Louis even more on edge, so much that he could already feel his cock getting hard again.

The realization had Louis crying out, and Harry took it to mean that Louis was further along than he was, so he started licking faster, slurping and rolling and folding his tongue across Louis’ rim more than he had before.

Louis could feel himself hunching in, like he wanted to preserve the feeling between his legs, but he knew he had to stop before he came again, before he could even get Harry’s cock inside him.

“Harry,” he whispered. Struggling to speak, he tried again louder. In a shaky, strained voice, he said, “Harry.”

Harry pulled his lips from Louis and looked up at him. He’d had his eyes closed the entire time, like he’d been completely enjoying it. Louis had no doubt that he had.

“I need you to stop. Please.” Louis lifted himself up and watched as Harry roughly wiped his mouth off with his hand.

“Fuck,” Louis said.

“You OK, babe?” Harry asked, mocking Louis in his sensitive state.

“Just sit back against the headboard.”

Harry did as he was told. He happily watched as Louis put more lube on his fingers.

Harry’s tongue had made things easier, so, taking a deep breath, Louis shoved two fingers inside himself. He twisted and turned them for just a moment before slipping in a third finger.

He didn’t spend much time there before he started to get desperate. He’d been on edge for so long and he really just needed Harry’s cock in him. He’d been eyeing it up for a while now. It was time.

Louis pulled his fingers out and wiped them off on the blanket on Harry’s bed. Then he started crawling toward Harry.

Harry sat against the headboard, waiting for Louis to climb into his lap. But instead of doing that, Louis ducked down and took Harry’s cock in his mouth.

“Fuck,” Harry hissed, taken completely by surprise. He watched Louis bob his head up and down quickly, not wanting to tease Harry so much as get him fully hard. Harry could feel it working, so well that he thought he might actually come soon if Louis didn’t get off him.

“Babe, stop,” Harry said. “Don’t want to come yet.”

Louis pulled off very slowly, leaving his lips wrapped around the head for just a few seconds as he stared at Harry.

Harry groaned and threw his head back, covering his eyes with his hands in hopes that losing the sight of Louis would help. He heard Louis rip open the condom wrapper and roll it down his cock, but Harry didn’t look again until he felt fingers trailing up his thighs.

Louis was now on his knees in between Harry’s legs, taking his time getting into the position Harry so wanted him to be in.

“Lou…”

Louis raised his eyebrows, but didn’t say anything.

“Come on!” Harry rolled his hips, really needing Louis to get a move on.

Louis smirked and slowly crawled closer to Harry, straddling his hips. “Was this what you wanted?” he asked innocently.

“Yes.”

“Hmmm… Well, what should we do, then?” Louis reached behind him and grabbed Harry’s dick. He lifted himself up just a bit, enough that he could line himself up properly.

“Maybe we should do this,” Louis said. Then he sunk down just enough so the tip of Harry’s cock pushed into Louis’ hole. Louis had to stop because just that first sensation was enough to knock the wind out of him.

“You already feel amazing,” Harry told him. He grabbed onto Louis’ hips, not forcing them to move yet, but just wanting to hang on.

“Yeah? What about now?” Louis stared at Harry as he moved down a little more, never breaking eye contact. He could feel himself getting fuller, more stretched out, and as much as he wanted to close his eyes, he held out. He did lick his lips, though, and smiled when he saw Harry’s eyes track the movement.

When he was fully seated in Harry’s lap, he took a second to try and breathe normally, but there was no way that was happening.

He rolled his hips a few times, wanting to get adjusted – and also to drive Harry a little bit crazy. He locked his legs around Harry’s before picking himself up about an inch. When he sank back down, he watched as Harry’s eyelids fluttered. Just that slight reaction from Harry made Louis want to keep going. The feeling inside him helped a bit, too.

Louis leaned forward a little and put his hands on Harry’s shoulders as he rose up again. The initial burn of Harry’s cock filling him up was quickly going away, replaced by only pleasure. He sank back down, shifting around until Harry hit his prostate.

Louis’ mouth dropped open and he started to move faster now that he knew how that felt. His grip on Harry’s shoulders tightened as he moved on Harry’s cock, aiming for that spot every time.

“God, you’re gorgeous,” Harry said, watching Louis move.

“Shut up.”

“Why? You don’t want to hear about how hot it is to watch you right now? Getting all flushed because you’re literally bouncing on me, trying to get yourself off. I can see my cock going in and out of you and-” Harry pinched Louis’ ass, earning him a slap on the arm. “-your ass is amazing.”

“Harry,” Louis moaned. He was starting to get tired, but he could feel himself getting closer.

“You need me, babe?”

Louis could only nod, too drained to do anything else.

Harry took that as his answer, so he sent his hips up, driving his cock up into Louis.

Louis whimpered. He did his best to keep moving up and down, and now that Harry was thrusting up, they were meeting in the middle.

Even better, Harry was hitting his prostate as he fucked up into him, and Louis knew it wouldn’t be much longer until he came again.

He wrapped a hand around his own neglected dick and jerked himself off as his movements came to a near halt.

Thankfully, Harry picked up the slack and kept moving his hips, bringing both of them to their orgasms.

“I’m coming. Shit, I’m gonna come.” Louis moved his hand faster over himself, and after a few more pumps, he was shooting out over his fist.

The mere sight of Louis’ blissful face after his orgasm pushed Harry over the edge.

“Louis, fuck!” he yelled as he came, filling up the condom.

Louis collapsed against Harry’s chest, and the two of them lay there struggling to breathe correctly.

The room was hot and smelled like sex and sweat, but Louis and Harry didn’t look or smell any better.

Harry pulled out after a while. He took off the condom and tied it off, dropping it in his trashcan on the way to the bathroom. He returned to his room after cleaning himself off, bring a warm, wet washcloth with him. He very gently wiped Louis off and threw the towel into his hamper.

Then he moved the blanket on his bed back and pulled it over him and Louis, holding him close.

They lay there in silence, both getting lost in their own heads over the evening’s events.

“You’re wonderful, you know,” Harry finally said as Louis started dozing off.

“You got that backwards, baby,” Louis said back.

\---

A few days later, when Harry asked Louis to be his boyfriend, Louis didn’t hesitate to say yes.

Harry said it was the best birthday present he’d ever had.


	5. Chapter 5

**October 2017**

 

“Babe, come here!” Louis called from the living room. “Come see this.”

He sat perfectly still as he waited for Harry come in from the kitchen.

“What is it?” Harry asked. When he entered the room, he stopped right where he was. “What are you doing?”

“It’s cool, right? You can say it is.”

Louis currently sat on the sofa, leaned back into the cushions and balancing his glass of water on his belly.

“You’re really proud of yourself, aren’t you?”

“Yeah. I’ve only been waiting my whole life for this moment.”

“You’ve been waiting your whole life to be able to rest a glass on your pregnant stomach without having to hold it?” Harry asked fondly.

“Yeah. I mean, after watching my mom do it so many times, I knew I would love it as soon as I was able to.”

“You’re a funny guy, that’s for sure.”

Louis grinned. “Thank you. I know, though.”

“Well, Mr. Comedian, what would you like to do for dinner? We forgot to do the grocery shopping yesterday like we were supposed to, so we’re sort of short on options.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be. My boy wanted to stay in bed and cuddle all day. How was I supposed to tell him no?”

Louis smiled. “Well, do we want to go out for dinner? Or we could order in.”

“Would you mind going out? We haven’t been out in a while.”

Louis shook his head. “Of course not. You’re gonna have to be patient with me, though. It’ll take me some time to get myself off this couch.”

Harry chuckled. “When am I ever not patient with you?”

“That’s true. Can you help me up, then?”

Harry nodded and moved the glass from Louis’ stomach. He held out both hands for Louis to take.

“OK,” Louis said, grabbing Harry’s hands. “Hang on.” He started to rock forward a little bit, trying to get enough momentum to roll up onto his feet. Now that he was eight months along in his pregnancy, it took a lot more effort to do even the simplest things, like standing up.

“Take your time,” Harry told him.

Louis nodded and tried to roll up again. “Almost there.”

Harry smiled as he watched Louis trying to get up. When he finally did, Harry wrapped his arms around his waist to make sure that he didn’t fall back to the couch, undoing all of his hard work.

“I’m tired.”

“I know you are. Catch your breath and then we can go upstairs.”

Louis nodded. After a moment, he was good to go, and the two of them went up to their room to get ready.

\---

“What do you think she’ll look like?” Louis asked as he waddled out of their bathroom later that night.

They’d wound up going to The Cheesecake Factory for dinner, the same place where they’d gone for their third date as a couple – and as Harry had clarified, it was the third  _actual_ date, where they both knew it was a date going in.

“I don’t know…” Harry said. “I mean, I had blonde hair when I was a kid. Your sisters have blonde hair. Maybe she’ll be blonde. I hope she has your eyes, though.”

Louis scrunched his face up as he sat down on the bed, leaning back against the headboard. “No, I want her to have your eyes.”

Harry shook his head. “No way. Definitely yours.”

“Fine, well I want her to have your curls, then. She’ll look so cute.”

“I mean, she’ll be cute no matter what, I think.”

“Obviously.”

“I want her to have your skin tone, though,” Harry said.

“Why?”

“You’re tanner than I am. It’s nice. I’m kind of pale sometimes.”

“Yeah, just sometimes. Like, in the fall and winter and early spring. But you get a little darker during the summer.”

Harry shook his head. “Nah, you’re like, naturally tan. I love that. And with blonde hair? I really love that.”

“I hope she gets your height!”

“Aww, babe, you don’t want her to be 5’9” like you?”

Louis laughed. “God, I’ve been lying to you about that for so long you actually believe it. That’s cute.”

Harry laughed, too. “OK, so we want a tall girl with blonde curly hair, blue eyes and tan skin. God, it sounds like we’re raising a surfer.”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“We live an hour from the nearest beach! We’re going to be doing a lot of driving if she winds up loving surfing.”

“Are you saying our daughter’s dreams aren’t important, Harry?”

“Of course they are! And why are we talking about this? She hasn’t even been born yet!”

“Just want to know where you stand on our daughter achieving everything she wants.”

“Have I ever told you how much I love when you drag me like that? And make me feel all flustered when I try to prove a point against you and eventually just give up and let you think that you’re right?”

Louis frowned. “No.”

“Good. I wouldn’t want to lie to you.”

Louis sat for a moment, processing what Harry had just told him. Then his jaw dropped and he gasped. “Rude!”

Harry just started laughing. “I love you.”

“Whatever.”

“Can I turn the light off now?”

“Yeah, please do. I’m exhausted. I need to sleep off the fact that my boyfriend doesn’t love me anymore.”

“Always with the dramatics.”

“I didn’t study Drama for nothing.”

\---

“Babe, I’m home!” Harry called out as he walked in the house. He dropped his keys and wallet on the table near the front door. He’d just had a great workout at the gym and all he could think about was taking a long shower and putting on some sweats.

But it didn’t look like that would be happening. As Harry was kicking off his sneakers, Louis came in slowly from the living room, holding his stomach.

“Harry…” Louis said quietly.

Harry looked up. “Lou, what’s wrong?”

“Um… I think… This might be it?”

Harry froze. He took in Louis’ panicked expression and tense form before reacting. “Oh, shit. Oh shit this is it!”

Harry ran past Louis and up the stairs to their bedroom. He went into the closet to find the hospital bag that they’d packed a few nights ago. He hadn’t realized he’d need it so soon.

He grabbed the black bag and slung it over his shoulder before looking around the room for anything else he might need. Realizing that all of the important things were already in the bag, he shook his head and bolted back downstairs to Louis.

“OK, let’s go! We have to go! Come on! Get in the car!” Harry stopped talking the second he realized that Louis didn’t look as nervous as he had a minute ago. “What’s wrong?”

Louis snorted before bursting into full laughter. “I’m sorry, Harry, I was just kidding.”

Harry dropped the bag to the floor as he watched Louis laugh. “What?”

“I’m sorry. Yeah, I’m not having the baby right now. I just really wanted to see what you would do.”

“What!”

“I know it was mean,” Louis said. “But my mom said we should practice, so I figured I would do it sooner rather than later.”

“You’re not having the baby right now?” Harry asked, wanting to confirm.

“No, I’m not. But you did really well with that. That was really fast.”

“Gee, thanks.”

Louis smiled. “Don’t be mad.”

“I’m not. I guess I’m glad I don’t have to go to the hospital smelling like this.”

“Yeah, I wasn’t gonna say anything, but…”

“Shut it. I’m putting this back upstairs and then I’ll be in the shower.”

“OK. Love you.”

“You too, I guess.”

 

**November 2017**

 

Louis paced back and forth in his bedroom trying to calm himself down. The room was too hot and he felt like he couldn’t breathe. He desperately fanned himself with his hands and wanted the tears in his eyes to go away and not fall down his cheeks.

“Oh, my God,” he whispered. He knew he was stressing himself out and needed to relax, but he just couldn’t.

The baby was due in two weeks and all he could think about was how  _not_ ready he was. He was only 22, just six months out of college. He and Harry weren’t married and they didn’t have jobs, and yet, they were about to have a baby. He wasn’t ready. They couldn’t possibly bring a baby into this world. What was he thinking?

He grabbed his phone from the bed and tried to call Harry again. Louis knew that he was at the gym, and always kept his phone in a locker while he was there, but he was desperate.

When the phone rang for the sixth time, Louis hung up and tossed his phone to the bed, because suddenly it was too much. He lost it. He sank down to the mattress as the tears started streaming down his face.

He stayed there for a while, just needing the tears to stop, but it was impossible. In times like this, he needed Harry, but of course he wasn’t answering.

So it looked like he would have to go to the next best thing. Once Louis stopped crying, he rolled up to his feet and searched for his keys.

\---

Twenty minutes later, Louis pulled up outside of his mom’s house. He got out of the car and made his way up the driveway.

Lottie sat out on the wooden bench they had on the porch. She had a notebook in her lap, so it looked like she was studying. When she saw him coming, she jumped up and the notebook went flying.

“Louis, what’s wrong? Is it the baby?” she asked.

“Where’s mom?”

“She’s in the kitchen. What happened?”

“Nothing. I just need mom,” Louis told her.

Lottie nodded and opened the door for him, letting him get by.

“Mom!” Louis called as he walked.

“Louis? In here!”

Louis walked into the kitchen and saw his mom standing at the counter chopping vegetables.

“Louis, what are you- What happened? Boo, what’s the matter?”

“I can’t do this!” Louis cried. “I can’t have a baby! What were we thinking?”

“Louis…”

“Mom, I can’t do this. I need- I just- I-”

“Louis, listen to me,” Jay said sternly. “I need you to calm down.”

“But mom, I can’t do this! Harry and I aren’t even married! Like, what’s wrong with us? And, I don’t have a job! Neither does he! Like, we’re barely adults and we’re having a kid and why did nobody tell me we couldn’t do this?”

“Louis, stop it. You absolutely can do this. You are going to be an amazing father.”

“What if I’m not?” Louis cried. “Mom, I’m not ready… I’m not-” He couldn’t get anything else out as the tears started falling again.

“Oh, baby,” Jay whispered. She pulled him into a hug and held onto him as he cried. She rubbed his back and made quiet shushing noises in an attempt to console him, but she knew that she had to let him get it all out.

The two of them stood right there in the kitchen, rocking back and forth, until Louis calmed down again.

“I don’t want to mess this up,” Louis quietly admitted.

“Why would you?” Jay asked. She pulled back so that she could see his face again. “What makes you think you could ever mess this up? You’ve been the best older brother anyone could have ever asked for. You’ve always been there for them, whatever they needed. You have the biggest heart and put everyone before yourself. You love this family unconditionally with everything you have, and you will raise this baby the same way, knowing what it’s like to be loved every single second of every single day. Louis, you can do this.”

“What if I can’t?”

“Then you have Harry, who loves you more than anything. The two of you are a team and if you need help, you have him. And that boy is beyond ready to be a father, too. He’s been by your side every second of this pregnancy, and that’s something I thought I could only hope for. He’s your partner in every sense of the word and he’s so excited for this baby. You two are ready.”

Louis sniffled. “But-”

“No buts. Yes, you two are young, but you’re perfect together. You have all the skills in the world to successfully raise a child; I know it. As for the work thing, I’m happy you both decided to take the year off before looking for jobs. It’s just easier to do it this way, so you don’t have to worry about asking for parental leave just a few months into the school year. Plus, I know we usually try to avoid the whole money issue, but it’s not like either of you  _need_ to work right now. It’s OK that you’re not working. In September, you can both go into a school after having a nice long break with Amelia.  _And_ , in case you missed this in health class, Louis, two people don’t have to be married to make a baby.”

Louis snorted. “I know, mom.”

“So why is that an issue of concern?”

Louis shrugged and looked down toward the floor.

Jay narrowed her eyes. “Louis, you don’t think Harry would… leave you and the baby, do you?”

“No. I don’t know. Maybe.”

“Louis!” Jay gasped.

“What?” Louis looked back up at his mom. “I mean, I don’t know what I’m doing…”

“Neither does he.”

“- and I look like a whale right now -”

“As if Harry has ever cared about how you look. You must’ve missed the sappy way he stares at you when you do even the silliest of things. It’s quite disgusting, actually.”

“I just don’t want him to feel like I trapped him or something. I mean, none of this was planned.”

“Well, I’m probably biased, but usually the best things in life are unplanned.”

Jay looked lovingly at Louis when she said that, and Louis could only blush. “Thanks, Mom.”

“You’re welcome. And Harry would never feel trapped. Harry was born to be a father; I knew that the moment I met him. Remember that first time he came over for dinner? He carried Ernest around in his arms the whole night? And when he finally put him down, he picked up Doris. He loves babies and children, and they feel the same way about him. What was it his mom said about him last fall? A heart of gold and boots to match?”

Louis smiled. “Yeah, that’s him.”

“Do you think Harry isn’t ready to be a dad?”

“No, of course not.”

“So why do you feel that way about yourself? You have more siblings and more experience with kids. You’ve watched more episodes of  _Peppa Pig_ and read _Where the Wild Things Are_ more times than I can keep track of. You’ve helped with warming bottles and getting babies to stop crying and hosting tea parties and getting kids to school on time. You’ve done all of the baby raising without the actual baby. Now you finally get to have one, and I couldn’t be more proud of you or more confident in your abilities. And I mean that.”

Louis watched his mom carefully. He felt a lot calmer than he had an hour ago, much more at peace. He asked, “How do you do that?”

Jay shrugged. “It’s a parent thing. You’ll know it soon enough.”

Louis smiled.

“Louis, you’ll make mistakes,” Jay said, finishing her encouragement. “You will. But that doesn’t mean you won’t be an incredible father. And you’ve got all of us on your side; don’t ever forget that.”

“Thanks, mom.”

“You’re welcome. Do you feel better?”

Louis nodded. Before he could add something else, he felt his phone vibrating in his jacket pocket. He pulled it out to see Harry was calling.

“Hello?” he answered.

“Baby, what’s the matter? You called me twice without a message? Are you OK? Is it Amelia? What’s going on?”

“Harry, calm down! I’m OK, Amelia is OK, everyone is OK.”

“Why did you call me? What happened?” Harry asked quickly.

“I had a… moment, I guess. Just a moment of anxiety and my nerves took over. But I’m fine, I swear. I’m at my mom’s.”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m positive,” Louis insisted. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

“It’s OK. I’m glad you went to talk to your mom, though. She’s been through this before; she can probably help you more than I can.”

“I still wanted you, though,” Louis said quietly into the phone, hoping his mom wouldn’t hear, even though he knew she was eavesdropping.

“I know, baby. I’m sorry I didn’t answer.”

“It’s OK. I promise I’m better. I’ll be leaving soon.”

“Come over for dinner!” Jay yelled suddenly.

“Mom!” Louis hissed.

Harry just laughed. “She wants me to come over for dinner?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Just saying,” Jay said innocently. “You’re already here. He might as well come over, too.”

“What do you say?” Louis asked Harry.

“Sounds good to me. I’ll just shower and then I’ll be over.”

“OK. I love you.”

“Love you, too. See you soon.”

“See you soon.”

Louis hung up the phone and stared at his mom. “Well, I know where I got my subtlety from.”

Jay frowned. “You don’t have any subtlety.”

“Exactly.”

\---

“So how are you feeling?” Niall asked.

It was just a few days before Louis’ due date and Niall and Liam were over for what could possibly be the last time before the baby arrived.

“I feel good,” Louis told him. “Um, we went to the doctor on Monday, and she said that I was right where I should be for this part of the pregnancy. Everything looks good, so it’s just a waiting game now until she’s ready to come out.”

“Are you ready for her to come out?” Liam asked.

“I’m definitely ready. This heavy belly makes it tough to breathe properly when I lay down. I can’t wait to relax on my back again.”

Liam and Niall laughed before Liam asked Harry the same question.

“Oh, I’m ready,” Harry answered. Then he glared at Louis. “Babe, why don’t you tell him how ready I am?”

Louis pressed his lips together, trying to hold his laugh in.

“Oh, boy,” Niall said. “Louis, what does that mean?”

“Um…” Louis started to answer, still trying not to laugh, “I sort of tricked Harry? I told him that the baby was coming when she really wasn’t and now he’s mad about it.”

“Yeah, it was great,” Harry cut in grumpily. “I’m running around the house trying to get the baby bag and my shoes and Louis’ pants and everything, and then all of a sudden, he starts giggling and tells me that he’s just kidding. It was really funny.”

“It sounds kind of funny,” Niall muttered under his breath.

“You know what, it would’ve been, if that was the only time he’s done that. But this was only the most recent time, just this morning.”

Liam and Niall started laughing loudly at that point, and Louis couldn’t help but join them.

“How many times did he get you, H?” Niall asked.

“Three! All at different times of the day over the last two weeks.”

“Why did you keep falling for it, though?” Liam wondered.

Harry threw his hands up. “I don’t know, maybe because my boyfriend is nine months pregnant and could go into labor at literally  _any time_.”

“I guess.”

Harry rolled his eyes.

“Babe, you’re not really mad, are you?” Louis asked gently, a smirk still on his face.

“Yes, I’m mad.”

“Why are you mad?”

“It was two in the morning!” Harry whined. “Why did you have to wake me up then?”

“Because Amelia kicked me awake and I couldn’t fall back asleep. I already went to the bathroom; what else did you want me to do?”

“Not wake me up! Go watch some TV. Get a snack. Do a word search. Anything else but get me up for a little prank.”

“You found it funny,” Louis said.

“No, I didn’t.”

“One day you will.”

“No, I won’t,” Harry told him. “I’ll never get over it.”

“Sure, you won’t.”

“Harry, just think about this moment the next time Louis scares you,” Niall said.

“I hope you don’t do this again. The next time you tell me you’re in labor, it better be the real deal, or I’m going to my mom’s.”

Louis snorted. “Yeah, right, like you would ever leave me alone. Remember, I could literally go into labor at any time.”

Harry glared at Louis using his own words against him. “I don’t like you.”

Louis shrugged. “As long as you love me, that’s OK.”

\---

Louis straightened the robin painting in the nursery and took a step back to look around the room again.

The painting had been hung up, onesies and diapers were ready on the changing table, clothes from the baby shower hung up in the closet and the carpet had been vacuumed earlier that morning. The curtains were tied back, the floor was swept and the paint smell was completely gone.

The nursery was completely ready for Amelia. Now all they needed was her.

Louis put one hand on top of his belly and one on the bottom, cradling his baby. He was ready; he was sure of it.

A gentle knock at the door captured Louis’ attention. He turned to the door to see Harry smiling softly at him.

“Hi,” Louis said.

“You look beautiful,” Harry told him.

“You need some new compliments.”

Harry chuckled and walked into the room. He wrapped his arms very carefully around Louis’ shoulders, pulling him close to him.

Louis rested his forehead against Harry’s chest and placed his hands on Harry’s hips. He took a deep breath, feeling more at peace than he had in a while.

“You ready?” Harry asked gently.

Louis nodded. “As ready as I’ll ever be.” He looked up at Harry and asked, “You?”

“More than ready, baby.” He ducked his head so he could rest his forehead against Louis’. “Can’t wait to be a dad with you. You’ll be the best dad this world has ever seen.”

“Nah, I think that’s you.”

Harry smiled. “Guess we’ll just have to be the best dad team the world has ever seen.”

“I love it.”

Harry softly pressed his lips against Louis’. When he pulled back, he whispered, “We’re having a baby.”

“Is that what this is? I thought I just had a big lunch.”

Harry chuckled. “No turning back now.”

“Good. I’ve got everything I’ve ever wanted. I really don’t want to.”

\---

It was the last week of November and Harry was watching TV in the living room. He was comfortable on the sofa, so comfortable that he was starting to doze off.

“Harry, get up, we have to go,” Louis said urgently, walking into the living room.

Harry sat up at Louis’ tone. “What’s the matter?”

“The baby’s coming.”

Harry frowned and shook his head before getting comfortable on the couch again. “I’m not falling for that again.”

“Harry, this is not the time. The baby’s actually coming right now, I swear.”

“OK. Babe, can you get me a bottle of water?”

“Harry!” Louis yelled. “I’m sorry for those other times, but I’m serious. The baby is coming right now.”

“OK. Cool.”

Louis tried to say something else, but all that came out was a moan. Harry looked over to see Louis’ shoulders hunching in and his hands spreading across his belly, like he was trying to protect it. He had a pained expression on his face and his breathing was shaky, at best.

“Oh, that Drama degree is really coming in handy, huh?” Harry asked. “Come sit with me; help me find a movie.”

Louis stood where he was, trying to balance out his breathing. After a moment, he came over to the couch and sat next to Harry.

Harry scrolled through his Netflix suggestions, not sure what he felt like watching.

“Can I hold your hand?” Louis asked softly.

“Of course.”

Harry put out his hand so Louis could take it. Seconds after Louis grabbed it, Harry just felt excruciating pain.

“Oh, my God!” Harry twisted off the couch as Louis groaned and squeezed his hand with more strength than Harry knew he had. “Lou, what the fuck?”

“Do you really think I’m still kidding?” Louis screamed. “Get off your ass and get me to the hospital!”

Harry stared at Louis, in complete shock. Then he finally mumbled, “Oh, shit, you’re in labor.”

“I know!” Louis yelled.

“Oh, shit!” Harry ran from the room and up the stairs to their bedroom. He put on his boots and grabbed shoes for Louis. Then he snatched Louis’ hospital bag from the closet before racing out and down the hallway.

When he passed Amelia’s room, he skidded to a halt. He took a few steps back so that he could peer inside, and it hit him that in a few days, they would be bringing back a baby to sleep in here, and she would learn and grow in it for the next eighteen years of her life.

“Fuck,” Harry whispered. “I’m gonna be a dad.”

Just then, Harry heard a wail from downstairs. “Harry! Where are you?”

“I’m coming!” With one last look inside the nursery, Harry ran back downstairs to get Louis and to get him to the hospital. The baby wasn’t waiting any longer.

\---

“Yeah, mom, we’re here now,” Harry said into the phone as he paced outside of Louis’ hospital room.

They had been taken back as soon as they arrived at the hospital and Louis hadn’t waited long before requesting an epidural. As soon as the nurse arrived to administer it, Harry had been asked to leave the room, so he figured it was a good time to make his phone calls.

“They’re giving him the drugs now,” Harry continued. “And then we have to wait a little while for it to take effect and for the baby to show that she’s ready to come out. But the doctor said it shouldn’t be much longer.”

“So when should we get there?” Anne asked. “Did you call Gemma yet? What about Jay?”

“I didn’t call Gemma, but I called Jay from the waiting room, since she has more people to get ready. But she said she’ll make an early dinner and be here around 6 or 7.”

“Then Gemma and I will get there then, too. How’s Louis?”

“He’s OK. He’ll probably feel better now, though.”

“I’m sure. The drugs don’t take long to take effect.”

“That’s what he’s hoping for.”

“And heads up, he’ll be saying some weird things probably, but that should stop once the medicine is better distributed in his system.”

“Yeah, Jay told us the same thing.”

The door to Louis’ room opened, and the nurse walked out. “You can go back in, Mr. Styles. He’s all done.”

“OK, thank you,” Harry said. “Mom, I’ll call you later if anything changes, OK?”

“Of course. Get back to Louis. Make sure he’s comfortable.”

“I will. I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

Harry hung up and went back into the room, already smiling at what he saw.

“Hi, Harry!” Louis said happily from the bed. “Where have you been?”

“I was calling my mom. Everyone’s excited.”

“I know! Because we’re having a baby, Harry!”

Harry laughed at his boyfriend, all loopy on his pain medicine. “We are. Are you excited?”

“So excited. We’re gonna have a little baby girl. Oh my God, wait. Come here.”

Louis beckoned him forward with one finger.

Harry went over to the bed. He put his palms on the mattress and leaned forward.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Louis whispered.

“Sure.”

“OK. Babe, remember how we took DARE in fifth grade, and we learned that drugs are bad?” Louis asked, his words slightly slurring together.

“Yeah…?”

“Well, I take it all back.” Louis started to giggle. “Drugs are great.”

Harry laughed along with Louis before kissing him on the forehead. “I love you.”

“I love you, too. Duh. Now let’s have this baby!”

The door opened, and their doctor walked in. “Mr. Tomlinson, Mr. Styles, it’s good to see you today.”

“Great to see you, too,” Harry said.

“Louis, how are you feeling?” Dr. Davis asked.

“Great!”

“Ahh, I see your epidural kicked in.”

Louis just grinned.

“How long do you think it will be before we can go to the delivery room?” Harry asked.

“Well, I’ll check. Obviously, male pregnancies are very different from female pregnancies. A lot less pushing, right? So, like we talked about before, Louis’ abdominals will be very tight, keeping the baby safe while she gets into the right position. When she’s ready, his muscles will loosen up, letting us know it’s time to take him back. Let me just check, and then I can give you a better time estimate.”

Harry nodded and watched as Dr. Davis pulled some gloves from a blue box on a counter near the front of the room.

After she put them on, she walked over to the bed and put her hands on top of Louis’ stomach.

Louis giggled. “That tickles.”

Dr. Davis just smiled as she pushed lightly down on the top and sides of his belly.

After a moment, she said, “within the hour.”

Harry just stared. “Within the hour?”

She just nodded. “Yes, I think so. Typically, male pregnancies tend to go much faster than female ones, just because there are less body parts that have to adjust. But I’ll be back in a half hour to check in, OK? Then we’ll go from there.”

“OK. Thank you.”

“Thanks!” Louis said.

“You’re very welcome,” Dr. Davis told them both.

She discarded her gloves in the trash can and exited the room, leaving Harry and Louis alone, and a bit in shock.

“One hour,” Harry said. “One hour and we’ll have our baby.”

“Do you think she’ll like us?” Louis asked sadly. “What if she doesn’t like us?”

“Who? Amelia?”

“Yeah.”

“Why wouldn’t she like us?” Harry wondered.

“I don’t know. I mean, I’ll play pranks on her and you tell awful jokes.”

Harry burst into laughter, taking Louis a bit by surprise.

“She will love us,” Harry told him. “Mostly because we’re her parents, and she can’t escape us.”

“Oh. That’s a good point.”

“Yeah. She’ll learn to ignore my jokes just like you do, and learn how to avoid your pranks, just like I do.”

“But you always fall for my pranks.”

“Then let’s hope she’s smarter than I am,” Harry said.

Louis laughed. “I love you.”

“I love you, too. Hey, Lou?”

“Yeah?”

“Why don’t they play poker in the jungle?”

“Why?” Louis asked.

“Because there are too many cheetahs!”

Louis started laughing. “Hey, babe?”

“Yeah?”

“I know I’m laughing right now, but just know it’s because of the drugs I’m on, OK?”

Harry grinned. “OK.”

“OK. Yeah, I really hope the baby has my sense of humor.”

\---

An hour later, Louis and Harry were in the delivery room. There was a curtain that hung above the bed, blocking Louis’ body from the chest down so that they couldn’t see the doctors performing the surgery.

Louis had been prepped, and Harry now wore scrubs over his clothes.

“OK, Louis,” Dr. Davis said from the other side of the curtain. “Are you ready?”

“Ready,” Louis answered shakily. Harry stood by the top of the bed, near Louis’ head. He took his hands in his and held on tightly.

“OK, Louis, you’ll feel a little bit of pressure, but it will be over in a second. I promise.”

“OK.”

Harry watched Louis’ face for any sign of discomfort or distress, but Louis was focused on the ceiling above him, his eyes not moving at all.

Harry heard the doctors muttering on the other side of the curtain, and as much as he wanted to look and see what they were doing, he knew that watching Louis was more important in this moment.

Until he heard a cry. A beautiful, high-pitched wail of a cry. It made Harry’s head spin, turning his gaze from Louis to beyond the curtain, but his view was blocked by one of the nurses.

“Harry?”

He looked back at the bed to see Louis now staring at him with a wide stare.

“Is that her?” Louis asked, his eyes already lined with tears.

“I think that’s her,” Harry whispered.

“Is she OK?”

“She’s wonderful, Louis!” Dr. Davis called over. “We’re just cleaning her up a little for you.”

“OK!” Louis sniffled. Tears began falling down his cheeks.

“It’s OK, babe,” Harry told him. He ducked his head and peppered Louis’ face with kisses. “Louis, she’s really here!”

“She’s actually here; I can’t believe it. Harry, she’s here.”

“Here’s your baby!”

Harry and Louis turned toward the voice, the one belonging to the nurse currently holding Amelia in her arms. Amelia’s hands were in fists and her skin was a beautiful new pink. Even though she was screaming, Louis and Harry knew they were in love.

“Oh, my God,” they said in unison.

“We’re going to finish cleaning her up and do some tests to make sure she’s healthy, OK?” the nurse said. “And once you’re back in your room, we’ll bring her in, all right?”

They could only nod, so amazed by the tiny sight in front of them.

As the nurse walked away, Louis stared back at Harry. “She’s here,” Louis repeated.

“She is. What a perfect little family we are.”

Louis puckered up his lips for a kiss, and Harry ducked down to give it to him.

Louis smiled when they pulled apart. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

\---

“I can’t believe how tiny she is.” Louis marveled at his baby girl, unable to take his eyes off her.

Harry sat on the bed next to Louis, one arm around his shoulders and the other tucked under Louis’ arm, the one that held Amelia.

It was just the three of them for now, although all of their families were in the waiting room, anxious to come see them.

Amelia was sleeping just then, and her fathers had never felt more at peace now that they had their completely healthy baby in their arms.

“Should I go get everyone?” Harry asked gently, even though he really didn’t want to disturb this moment.

Thankfully, Louis shook his head. “Not yet. They can wait a few more minutes. I just want you two for now.”

“OK, babe.”

Harry kissed the top of Louis’ head and stared at the baby, already knowing that he would never get tired of looking at her perfect, beautiful face.

As far as Harry concerned, he had his entire world in his arms right now. And he didn’t want it any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's it! I apologize (not really) for all of the tears you may have shed! But I'm sort of all about the fluff. Sorry not sorry. 
> 
> I absolutely loved writing this fic, no matter how frustrated I may have been at times, so I hope you love it as much as I do! 
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated. If you liked it, maybe reblog [this post](http://flamboyantommo.tumblr.com/post/165898580322) that I made?
> 
> Thank you!  
> Hit me up on [twitter](http://twitter.com/angelique_lee) or [tumblr](http://www.flamboyantommo.tumblr.com/) if you feel like it! If you follow me on either, let me know who you are so I definitely follow you back!  
> <3


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